[HazelGirl]

At the beginning of August, my T and I agreed to switch my appointments to Wednesdays. But a month and a half later, I'm still not used to it. My appointments used to be today, and I feel so odd knowing I'm not going today. I don't like Wednesday appointments, despite the fact that it works with my schedule a million times better. Ugh.

Any tips to help me not feel so terrible on Mondays?

[guilloche]

I'm sorry... I know what you mean. It's not exactly the same, but I do piano lessons once a week... and some semesters the schedule changes, and it always confuses me and makes the flow of my week feel "off".

Do you do any kind of preparation for T? Like, make lists of what to talk about or print stuff out? If so, you could make Monday your "prep" day to get yourself ready?

Otherwise... maybe just find a nice way to treat yourself on Mondays? Some meditation or guided imagery, a nice peaceful walk, chocolate cheesecake yumminess?

(((HazelGirl)))

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by guilloche

I'm sorry... I know what you mean. It's not exactly the same, but I do piano lessons once a week... and some semesters the schedule changes, and it always confuses me and makes the flow of my week feel "off".

Do you do any kind of preparation for T? Like, make lists of what to talk about or print stuff out? If so, you could make Monday your "prep" day to get yourself ready?

Otherwise... maybe just find a nice way to treat yourself on Mondays? Some meditation or guided imagery, a nice peaceful walk, chocolate cheesecake yumminess?

(((HazelGirl)))

I don't do a lot of prep. I only text my T what I want to talk about if I think I will have a hard time bringing it up. But that's only occasionally. Other than that, I just show up.

I know for me it's a consistency and reliability thing. It makes me feel anxious and "off" when things change, and my appointments have been on Mondays for the past two years. It's very different, and I don't like it. I know I will eventually adjust, but right now, I feel anxious and stressed just because the days have changed.

[Soccer mom]

Maybe your T. would have some suggestions to make the adjustment easier. Unfotunately like a lot of things it may just take time.
I'm trying so hard to stay busy in between sessions (this 1.5 weeks seems like FOREVER) and it's hard to do especially when I have a lot I want to say and know the 50 minutes won't be enough. I'm doing all I can not to ask for another appt this week.

[Crook32]

I know what you mean. My appointments with the new T are on Wednesday and my old appointments were on Tuesday. This is my first week without a Tuesday appointment so I was trying to figure out what to do tomorrow when 4pm gets here.

I have thought about just trying to distract myself as much as possible at work but that is all I have come up with so far. I hope some others can come up with ideas for you.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[sweepy62]

I don't do well with change either I'm horrible at it, even minor ones, I swear I have mini meltdowns to just ruminating. My days are Wednesdays , my t is great like that she knows I like Wednesday at 11 . It's only a matter of time before you get use to it.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[HazelGirl]

I feel silly that it's causing me so much stress. It shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Change is hard for me too! How about doing something special on this day every week, like something you enjoy- getting coffee/ ice cream/ a new book/ take a hobby class/ etc?

[sweepy62]

Originally Posted by HazelGirl

I feel silly that it's causing me so much stress. It shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Why not? If its bothering you then it is. It's a change, if your like me, change causes me distress , it's like a Jenga game, when the pieces crumble down and you have to start again. I'm still distressed over this damn schedule , I could be saying well I'm still seeing her right? Nope!!! It's a Jenga game and all my pieces came down. Even though you said ok to Wednesday , it doesn't mean you were expected to react well to the change.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[StillSearching11]

My appointments are Thursdays, and I hate it. I don't go every week, but on weeks where I do go, I would rather start the week with a therapy appointment than spend the entire week waiting to unload.

[HazelGirl]

Thanks. It's just that I always respond so drastically to things like this. I get anxious and stressed, and I feel scared and rejected. And it's all my own freaking doing. I suggested the time change because it worked much better with my schedule. But at the same time, I feel so terrible as a reaction to it. What the heck is wrong with me!!?

[ThisWayOut]

I had reacted badly to changes I had asked for in the past. It's just a mastery of throwing of the routine. Currently, I see my t on Saturdays. It totally throws me because my appointments Jane always been on weekdays. Now it feels really off... it's OK to be thrown by changes, especially if your sense of control is off (as mine is currently).

[HazelGirl]

Yeah, I have major problems with control. And it definitely comes out when things change.

HG, I wanted to thank you for posting this. I had to reschedule my T appointment from this morning to tomorrow afternoon, because I had to give a lecture today. Tuesday mornings have been my T time for over two years, and yesterday afternoon I started to feel really awful without any obvious cause - I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that it was Monday and not holiday time, and I still wasn't going to see T the next day. And I'm still feeling kind of lost and thrown. Thanks for helping me identify what it is about!

[blur]

hazel, it sounds like possibly asking for things, like with your friend too, makes you worry the other person will end the relationship or reject you. idk, does that sound at all like what it might be? it can be really hard to ask for things when your needs weren't taken care of when you were young. you can end up feeling like it isn't allowed or the person will get mad or reject you or leave, etc.

i really like the idea of doing something nice for yourself on mondays. shoot, you could even watch cartoons when you'd normally have T.

[iheartjacques]

Do something for yourself at the time you would've had your appointment? Journal a conversation with t in your head?

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by blur

hazel, it sounds like possibly asking for things, like with your friend too, makes you worry the other person will end the relationship or reject you. idk, does that sound at all like what it might be? it can be really hard to ask for things when your needs weren't taken care of when you were young. you can end up feeling like it isn't allowed or the person will get mad or reject you or leave, etc.

i really like the idea of doing something nice for yourself on mondays. shoot, you could even watch cartoons when you'd normally have T.

My T and I texted for a few minutes yesterday, and came to the conclusion that my mind is used to discussing things on Mondays. To not be able to do that is stressful and anxiety-provoking, simply because I am used to "unloading" on Mondays.

Originally Posted by Mastodon

HG, I wanted to thank you for posting this. I had to reschedule my T appointment from this morning to tomorrow afternoon, because I had to give a lecture today. Tuesday mornings have been my T time for over two years, and yesterday afternoon I started to feel really awful without any obvious cause - I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that it was Monday and not holiday time, and I still wasn't going to see T the next day. And I'm still feeling kind of lost and thrown. Thanks for helping me identify what it is about!

Yeah, I have always felt the same way when we have to change appointments because of holidays or vacation. It always throws me off, so I knew it would be a little difficult to switch. I just didn't expect it to be this difficult or to last this long.

Originally Posted by iheartjacques

Do something for yourself at the time you would've had your appointment? Journal a conversation with t in your head?

I ended up spending some time journaling about the different stressors in my life and getting them out on paper. And that helped a little bit.