Protecting Me

HazelGirl · Sep 17, 2014, 10:18 PM

My T told me today that she feels like she wants to protect me sometimes, which was really sweet of her. I know one of her daughters is a year older than me, and one is a year younger, so I know that contributes (she has said so herself). But it's nice to have someone who wants to protect me, who cares, who worries about me if I'm struggling, and who is there for me. These are all things I've felt like I needed for a long time, but never got (I'm only 22). I was never protected, cared about, worried over, or anything like that. I was the "strong" one who never was given any nurturing, so I acted like I didn't need it.

I don't know what the point of this thread is, except to say I am really appreciative of my T right now and definitely lost in transference feelings. Haha.

growlycat · Sep 17, 2014, 10:25 PM

It is nice, isn't it?

My longtime T once ended one of our arguments brilliantly….in an exasperated tone he said "I only want to protect you from this!!!! (despairing feelings)"

I think I paused and said, "oh."

end of argument.

sweepy62 · Sep 17, 2014, 11:12 PM

That's great, I'm happy she said that. She really cares.

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HazelGirl · Sep 17, 2014, 11:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by growlycat

It is nice, isn't it?

My longtime T once ended one of our arguments brilliantly….in an exasperated tone he said "I only want to protect you from this!!!! (despairing feelings)"

I think I paused and said, "oh."

end of argument.

Haha, I totally understand that. I can imagine having an argument with my T some day like that. It is really nice to know she is there for me, in ways I haven't ever experienced before. I feel like I can go to her when something is wrong, and she will help me through it, rather than blaming me and leaving me to clean up my own mess. I really, really appreciate her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweepy62

That's great, I'm happy she said that. She really cares.

Yes, she does. But I forget that all the time. I start to believe that she doesn't. And then she reminds me that she really does and really wants to help me, if I let her.

ScarletPimpernel · Sep 17, 2014, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HazelGirl

Yes, she does. But I forget that all the time. I start to believe that she doesn't. And then she reminds me that she really does and really wants to help me, if I let her.

I doubt all the time that my T cares. I know she does, but something just clicks in my brain and I decide she doesn't. My T knows this (and I think it frustrates her). So she had me do an assignment. I went home and wrote out a list of all the ways my T has shown me that she cares. I wound up with a list of 68 different ways. That has helped me a lot. The doubts still like to creep in, but it's easier to ignore them when I have evidence that says otherwise.

HazelGirl · Sep 18, 2014, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

I doubt all the time that my T cares. I know she does, but something just clicks in my brain and I decide she doesn't. My T knows this (and I think it frustrates her). So she had me do an assignment. I went home and wrote out a list of all the ways my T has shown me that she cares. I wound up with a list of 68 different ways. That has helped me a lot. The doubts still like to creep in, but it's easier to ignore them when I have evidence that says otherwise.

I like this idea!