[LilacLime]

I've been seeing my current T on and off since 2012, but I've been going once a week pretty consistently this entire year. It wasn't until this April that I actually started to feel comfortable with her, and it honestly it's still an on going process (I'm very guarded, but my T is fantastic thankfully). I've been really struggling lately. I really wanted to go twice a week, but was too afraid to ask. Last session my T actually brought it up and said she thought it would be a good idea. For the first few days after this session I was thrilled because I really needed this and now there'll only be three days between my sessions, and three days seems way less daunting than a whole week.

Now here's were the problem starts. I talked with my mom about it and she's totally on board with it. Although I think I kind of worried her a little. She made a joke saying, "Wow if you need to go twice a week maybe I need to look into therapy." That kind of stung to be honest. Now all I have to do is talk to my dad about it. The problem with that is that I haven't even told him about any of my diagnoses yet (he thinks I have depression/adjustment issues because of my mom and his divorce), and I think this will really scare him. I have to tell him about going twice because it's going to show up on our insurance twice now, and he'll call and yell at her assuming she's double charging us if I don't. I need to find a way to tell him about it without alarming him.

After this week I'm switching my appointment from Tuesdays at 3 to Mondays at 3 and Thursdays at 10. The entire time I've been seeing this T our sessions have always been on a Tuesday (usually at 2). I'm really afraid I'm going to hate it. Plus if there's ever a holiday on a Monday I'm going to have to jimmy around my schedule and hope there's a time we both can do. Also what if she's not a Monday person, and by 3 I'm her second to last appointment. I just am really unsure about this time slot. Plus I'm really reluctant to give up my Tuesday spot because I know she'll fill it almost immediately after. I hate making decisions that I can't easily change.

Also I kind of feel like a freak for needing to see my T so often. Like I feel pathetic because I have no other support system. I'm also really afraid of becoming too dependent on my T. I don't want to scare her away either. I'm just really unsure if this was the right move on my part. Also even though she brought it up, she kept saying she was okay with it like I had brought it up. I just wish she was more encouraging of it. I don't know maybe i just misinterpreted her tone or what she really meant.

I also realized we never confirmed our session for the following Monday, and now I'm terrified that she's going to fill that slot, and I won't be able to get in. I can't call her til Monday morning and even then I'm not sure if I will because I don't want to seem needy or high maintenance. I don't know what do you guys think. Should I call her? I just really don't like change. This is supposed to be a good thing, but I feel awful.

Anyway, thanks for reading my huge wall of text I really appreciate it.

[AustenFan]

You could call and say 'I'm just double checking about this afternoon...did we say 2:00 or 3:00 o'clock??' Just make it sound like you can't remember the time, that way you won't sound worried she forgot or like you seem needy (which I don't think you are).

Does your mom have advice about how to tell your dad? Can you just say you're finding it helpful and think twice a week would be doubly helpful? That you and your T feel you are at a good place to work a bit harder and get more out of it by going twice a week?

I wouldn't worry about her not being a Monday person. If that were truly the case I don't think she'd schedule a whole day's worth of appointments then. You're not a freak for wanting to go twice and for wanting support. You're smart for knowing what you need and not being afraid to take it when it's offered. Good luck.

[gma45]

Hi LilacLime, Well the way I see it is , If you change to Mondays all holidays are on Mondays mostly those are the days people take off. But when a Monday holiday rolls around you could just go back to once a week on those weeks. I would let your dad know soon about it. Dads can worry so I don't think you have to go into to much detail just that you are going to try going twice a week for a while if the insurance will cover it. I think I would call on Monday but still keep my Tuesday appt this week. But that's just me. I hope things go well for you. I am sure they will work out, just try to relax a bit.

[guilloche]

Hi LilacLime -

- First, what a cool name! I had to say it... it just really struck me!

- Second, about telling your dad. He's not paying for it, is he? Is it really just to prepare him for the surprise of seeing it on the insurance statements? I'd just say something like, "Dad, therapy has been a big help. I'm still working through some issues, and my therapist suggested that I come in twice a week. I just wanted to let you know, so that you aren't surprised when you see it on the insurance statement." You don't need to go into details about your diagnosis or what you're doing, in my opinion, unless you want to, as that's pretty private stuff.

- Third, I just had to say - not having a good support network doesn't make you a freak. I don't either. It's unfortunate, and something we can work on, but I'm the same way. It is what it is, no judgements needed!

Good luck! I hope you get settled into your new therapy schedule quickly, changes are always a bit rough... but I'm sure once you get started and get through a couple weeks, it will seem totally normal.

[LilacLime]

Originally Posted by guilloche

Hi LilacLime -

- First, what a cool name! I had to say it... it just really struck me!

Thanks! I spent a lot of time think of it. I really like the alliteration, and they are my two favorite colors. I was still unsure about it, but after reading your comment I think I like it too.

Also thanks to everyone that commented on this. I was kind of in a downward spiral last night, but I'm feeling much better today. All of your kind words and advice really helped.