[krisakira]

I have been in EMDR therapy for a few weeks now, and have had 2 real EMDR sessions with the bilateral stimulation. I have chosen to use the vibrators you put in each hand that vibrates back and forth. Seem to work most comfortably for me. I was in EMDR a few years ago for a few sessions and hated it, but my therapist left the practice so it ended. I had DBT in between and recently completed the program. My DBT therapist seemed to not know how to help my trauma stuff so she referred me to the EMDR therapist (luckily in the same facility) which I was hesitant to do but am glad I did. So far, I have chosen my safe place, a castle, and my container, a treasure chest. The first bilateral stimulation session I focused on my dissociating episodes and putting the dissociation into the container. I wouldn't say it has worked yet, because I think I need more practice with it before it can really help. The second session was yesterday. I expressed my anxiety about a trip I have next weekend, involving flying and visiting a friend I had not seen in 9 years nor had ever been to the house she's living in currently. In fact, I've never been to Minnesota at all. So, she said we could do some bilateral stimulation with a problem solving exercise. She had me go through each step of the process of saying bye to my husband, getting on the plane, getting to the layover, getting to my destination, meeting up with my friend, being at her house, etc. All the steps. And whenever I said I was uncomfortable or had anxiety about a certain step, we would come up with solutions for letting me be able to get through the situation. For instance, the problem I have with saying goodbye to my husband can be solved by texting and calling him a lot during the visit and making sure my phone is fully charged before I leave for the airport and remembering to bring my charger. That way I am only a text or call away from him, and it puts me at ease. We did problem solving for the whole trip, everything I said I was nervous about or had anxiety or felt like there was an obstacle. My therapist even let the session go in over-time, to make sure we were done with everything. I have never had a therapist before allow me to stay past the hour. I think it has helped me to relax about my trip. I feel more prepared. She said we will get into the more traumatic experiences later on, once I am able to get through smaller and less stressful things, like anxiety and financial and school stress. We will build up to the more serious traumatic stuff as time goes by. I think that's why I didn't like EMDR the first time, was because we just jumped right into a really traumatic memory without trying smaller things first to get me used to my container and safe place. We jumped right in and I felt traumatized all over again. I have heard this from other people too. My advice for anyone in EMDR would be to go slow, start with smaller things, and then get to the big stuff later.

[Partless]

That's nice of you to share the EMDR sessions in such details, I think it's helpful to people considering this treatment.

[pattijane]

krisakira, sounds like you've got a great therapist! There's a saying in the trauma therapy world: "the slower you go, the fast you get there." Makes sense, right?!

I use EMDR therapy as my primary psychotherapy treatment and I've also personally had EMDR therapy for anxiety, panic, grief, and “small t” trauma. As a client, EMDR worked extremely well and also really fast. As an EMDR therapist, and in my role as a facilitator who trains other therapists in EMDR therapy (certified by the EMDR International Association and trained by the EMDR Institute, both of which I strongly recommend in an EMDR therapist) I have used EMDR therapy successfully with panic disorders, PTSD, anxiety, depression, grief, body image, phobias, distressing memories, bad dreams, and many other problems. It's a very gentle method with no significant "down-side" so that in the hands of a professional EMDR therapist, there should be no freak-outs or worsening of day-to-day functioning.

One of the initial phases (Phase 2) in EMDR therapy involves preparing for memory processing or desensitization (memory processing or desensitization - phases 3-6 - is often what is referred to as "EMDR" which is actually an 8-phase method of psychotherapy). In this phase resources are "front-loaded" so that you have a "floor" or "container" to help with processing the really hard stuff, as well as creating strategies if you're triggered in everyday life. In Phase 2 you learn a lot of great coping strategies and self-soothing techniques which you can use during EMDR processing or anytime you feel the need. It sounds like you're spending lots of time in this phase which really will make the rest of the work easier.

In phase 2 you learn how to access a “Safe or Calm Place” which you can use at ANY TIME during EMDR processing (or on your own) if it feels scary, or too emotional, too intense. One of the key assets of EMDR therapy is that YOU, the client, are in control NOW, even though you weren’t in the past, during traumatic events or other distressing experiences. You NEVER need re-live an experience or go into great detail, ever! You NEVER need to go through the entire memory. YOU can decide to keep the lights (or the alternating sounds and/or tactile pulsars, or the waving hand, or any method of bilateral stimulation that feels okay to you) going, or stop them, whichever helps titrate – measure and adjust the balance or “dose“ of the processing. During EMDR processing there are regular “breaks” and you can control when and how many but the therapist should be stopping the bilateral stimulation every 25-50 passes of the lights to ask you to take a deep breath and say just a bit of what you’re noticing, anything different, any changes. The breaks help keep a “foot in the present” while you’re processing the past. Again, and I can’t say this enough, YOU ARE IN CHARGE so YOU can make the process tolerable. And your therapist should be experienced in the EMDR therapy techniques that help make it the gentlest and safest way to detoxify bad life experiences and build resources.

Grounding exercises are essential. You can use some of the techniques in Dr. Shapiro's new book "Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help Techniques from EMDR." Dr. Shapiro is the founder/creator of EMDR but all the proceeds from the book go to two charities: the EMDR Humanitarian Assistance Program and the EMDR Research Foundation). The book is an easy read, helps you understand what's "pushing" your feelings and behavior, helps you connect the dots from past experiences to current life. Also gives lots of really helpful ways that are used during EMDR therapy to calm disturbing thoughts and feelings.

Pacing and dosing are critically important. So if you ever feel that EMDR processing is too intense then it might be time to go back over all the resources that should be used both IN session and BETWEEN sessions. Your therapist can use a variety of techniques to make painful processing less painful, like suggesting you turn the scene in your mind to black and white, lower the volume, or, erect a bullet-proof glass wall between you and the painful scene, and so forth. There are a lot of these kinds of "interventions" that ease the processing. They are called "cognitive interweaves" that your therapist can use, and that also can help bring your adult self's perspective into the work (or even an imaginary Adult Perspective). Such interweaves are based around issues of Safety, Responsibility, and Choice. So therapist questions like "are you safe now?" or "who was responsible? and "do you have more choices now?" are all very helpful in moving the processing along.