[Rosie25]

I've gone to therapy twice in my life.

First time I was like 19 years old. I was dealing with some anxiety and bullying issues I never faced. It did good to me but I never talked about deeper problems like my depression and mild OCD.

For two years I was pretty good but then I had a terrible emotional breakdown. All the things I was trying to deny went to surface and for 2 months I was almost a non-functional human being. My mom said it was a good idea to have some therapy again and I agreed.

Honestly, it was refreshing since my family is very conventional. We have a long story of depression but they have this "motto" of just get over it because more you think about it, more it affects you. Anyway, I went to this therapist and, even at first it was good, I started to feel like she was just making me go to get the money. Each session it was the same thing and I wasn't progressing at all. So I decided to cut it and finally try to face my problems.

I'm a lot better now, facing the fact I have depression and OCD it's a huge relief. However, I have to issues I want to discuss and even if I have a great relationship with my mom, I think she wouldn't understand them.

First, I'm afraid of having another emotional breakdown. It's unlikely but i'ts something always lurking in the back of my mind.

Second, I have some really bad trust issues that are giving me problems in my relationships. I discovered the reason recently (my dad didn't die as I was told, he just abandoned me, something I kind of knew) and I really think I need to get over it in order of having a healthy relantionship someday

Third, I want to have more emotional independency. I love my mom and she's great but I feel I need to stop relying in her everytime I'm a little sad about all since I want to leave my country for studies and work.

Now the problem, since the last bad experience of therapy and that stupid motto of my family has, I know they'll freak out when I tell them I want to go again. They'll say things like "you're so good now! it might do wrong to you!" "you're wasting your money in a pity party that only will make you feel more depressed".

I know it's easy to say: " screw them! it's your choice! but I think it's not just so easy when you're close to them and they were (and are) your main emotional support for so many years and so many breakdowns.

So what I do? How I tell them? I really don't want to hide and make excuses to go to therapy. I think that it's something it won't do any good to me

thanks for reading

[Bill3]

I know it's easy to say: " screw them! it's your choice! but I think it's not just so easy when you're close to them and they were (and are) your main emotional support for so many years and so many breakdowns.

It isn't easy at all but it sounds like saying This my choice is what you need to do.

Do you plan to tell them the reasons you mentioned above? If not, then here is an idea:

Family, I've given this a lot of thought and I've decided to go back to therapy. I am starting on _______.

If/when they besiege you with negative questions or criticism:

I'm sorry that you feel that way, but I've made up my mind: I need to start therapy now.

Repeat as often as needed (which might be quite often!).

[Victoria'smom]

I need to go back to a therapist as I'm becoming unwell and don't want to wait until it gets like last time.

[Favorite Jeans]

The practice of going to therapy without telling them and figuring out how to carve out a little privacy and independence in your emotional life would probably be therapeutic in and of itself.

[Xenon]

Yeah, unfortunately, there's no way you can tell them that will prevent the criticism and nay-saying if that happens to be their attitude toward therapy. You can either tell them and stand firm the way Bill3 suggested, or keep it to yourself for now.

Also, choosing not to tell them now doesn't mean you can't tell them later. You can always start on your own without mentioning it to anyone, and leave the option open to tell them some other time. I think starting therapy is hard enough without making some other difficult thing a prerequisite for doing so.

Right now, no one knows I'm in therapy besides me and my therapist. That doesn't mean I've decided never to tell anyone, but this feels fine for me right now to keep it to myself. I don't really want to deal with questioning about Is It Helping and All That Money I'm Spending; I just want to be left to be for now. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

[ThisWayOut]

If you feel the need to tell your family you want to return to therapy, you can, but as others have said, you can also choose to omit that info for now... you need to do whatever is best for you.