Sweepys thread just triggered something in me. My T keeps trying start csa work with me, but just talking about it vaguely destabilises me (according to my T) and we have to stop. We have been trying to do this for 3years now. We have tried EMDR and exposure,but he says I need more bodywork. Plus he's gone off to do more training but I haven't asked about that yet as I haven't been very well lately and are stabilising my mood.
I was just wondering how long did it take people to really start talking and processing the csa work. I would like to get on with this but my T is hesitant and ddoesn't want to rush me.
What other sort of bodywork is there that people have tried?

[stopdog]

I think it can take awhile. I have not tried emdr or bodywork that I know of. No therapist has suggested it.

[feralkittymom]

BPA, I think the time is very, very individual, and there's no better or worse scenario there. Stability is important because you need that base to support you when the emotions around the CSA work surge. When your T says you need more bodywork, what does that mean? Is this something you've been doing, or something new he wants to start?

I never did bodywork, nor exposure/emdr--happily. My therapy was relational/psychodynamic. But I didn't have recall until the depression started to lift, so it wasn't like knowing ahead of time and then planning the work. It just started breaking out. Dissociation was the biggest problem, and my T often had to slow the process down in order to lessen the dissociation and keep me functional in my life. It was a balancing act. So the overall process was probably longer than some, but "gentler." He didn't believe in digging for the sake of digging; we talked about memories and fragments as they emerged. Actually, I usually wrote memory narratives, and often then couldn't talk about them until a lot later. And even then, we didn't talk about them in an exposure sort of way, but rather referred to incidents and moments as a way of opening up feelings and discharging them, as well as correcting cognitive distortions.

[sweepy62]

It's taken a while as you know this is my 3rd t, also I have had alot of stressors so we have had to pre start and stop many times , plus the c s a language barrier is in the way. We are starting shaing now pre exposure with the c s a words and feelings around it. I'm not saying any of those words yet. She is not trained in emdr . I don't understand the body work, I do have body memories .

Thanks everyone. I think by bodywork he means stuff like grounding, and becoming more aware of the sensations onmy body. Somatic therapy is bodywork. What rainbow does is bodywork. I couldn't even stand him sitting in chair next to me let alone waving his hand infront of my face in a vaguely threatening way when we did emdr.
Sometimes I just get flooded with body memories and can't tell where in the body they are.
That's time when I dissociate and don't remember anything about the session. He always ask how much the last session do I remember while his other clients get asked about the thoughts and feelings about the last session.

[feralkittymom]

Sounds like trying to slow down the dissociation so that you can begin to get control of it. If he can help you isolate the progression of it by noticing it in your body, then you can counter some of the effects by targeting that area of your body. For me, it involved mostly breathing, and a feeling in the pit of my stomach like you get on a roller coaster dropping, as my perception was that the room was tilting and shifting strongly.

[sweepy62]

To me just her saying the c s a words for now , and me explaining or trying what they mean to me, feels like a bunch of pins and needles in my body and a feeling like riding an elevator , and in my head I hear screeching a black board, so I cover my ears.

Thanks I just feel like a fool, because I think maybe trying to avoid it even though i know i need to doit.
A while ago T and were speaking about the length of time II have been coming and he said that he hopes I don't think he is spinning me along just for money. That was the most ridiculous thing I have heard as if my paltry payment is going to make a difference when I know most of his other clients pay $100 more than me for session.

For me the dissociation is quite sudden. One minute T just has to mention a word and suddenly its the next day. I hate that.

[feralkittymom]

It was very fast for me, too, sometimes, though I don't think so deep. I definitely have chunks of session time that I don't remember, and didn't remember at the time, but I don't think I ever lost RL time. But it can get better (((BPA)))