Reminder: We don't question other people's experiences or history

precaryous · Feb 10, 2015, 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anilam

I guess your support ends where other ppl's could get hurt?
We (posters/mods) still don't know whether this poster's story is false. You might think so but you don't know it- the only person who knows is the one posting it (delusions aside).

Perhaps I was not clear.

I might wonder if the poster's story is false or, I may not. I have not expressed an opinion one way or the other. I am a helpful member of PC, not hurtful.

I feel I am not alone wanting to process possible betrayal in a thread. I am wondering out loud how to construct a post to process such a thing (not naming or hurting anyone) without it being construed as a flame and being deleted or sanctioned.

unaluna · Feb 10, 2015, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

No, not true. "Our moms" were only supposed to tell us that if we grew up in a specific culture. What you quote is a cultural script that is not universal, and in many cultures (including several English-speaking countries) that script is not part of correct or polite behaviour.

If that very specific cultural script is supposed to be a norm on this international discussion forum, the mods have to make that very clear. Because to many of us, that script is foreign; we can adjust to it, but it is not something we are supposed to know.

You are correct. In the usa, the expression was that moms told their children, "if you cant say something nice about a person, dont say anything at all." It is on pc that dr john urges us to say something supportive. My writing in the original post was not precise.

Feb 10, 2015, 11:21 AM

" that may include delusions or delusional beliefs. How validating is it to be told one's delusions aren't real"....

I disagree with this statement. In therapy my delusions were always gently challenged.

Yearning0723 · Feb 10, 2015, 11:25 AM

If anyone is feeling betrayed or hurt about this situation, you can PM me and I will give you all the information I have.

brillskep · Feb 10, 2015, 11:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by _Mouse

" that may include delusions or delusional beliefs. How validating is it to be told one's delusions aren't real"....

I disagree with this statement. In therapy my delusions were always gently challenged.

Yes, gently. But this forum is not a therapy setting, supportive as it may be.

missbella · Feb 10, 2015, 11:48 AM

When you open a thread with the commanding second-person plural syntax, "We do not question or call into question," which likely hasn't been used on my cohorts since we were 12, I make strong inferences about your regard for your community and its concerns.

It's an ironic syntax if you intended to open a discussion about respect.

About distortion: I thought there's a large swath of mental health providers whose mission is to divest the world of its distortions through CBT and its cousins.
http://forums.psychcentral.com/psych...bout-them.html

Quote:

Originally Posted by DocJohn

I would kindly ask members to remain on-topic in my thread, which is about respecting another member's story, even if you don't agree with or believe it. Remember, some of our members may be suffering from symptoms of a mental disorder that may include delusions or delusional beliefs. How validating is it to be told one's delusions aren't real and they're making it all up? To me, it's no different than someone telling a person who suffers from depression that their depression isn't real.

DocJohn

Feb 10, 2015, 11:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brillskep

Yes, gently. But this forum is not a therapy setting, supportive as it may be.

you obviously have little knowledge of what 'supportive' really looks like.

DocJohn · Feb 10, 2015, 12:25 PM

Well, okay then. Sorry, but it seems this thread isn't going anywhere positive, despite my attempts and my apology.

I'm closing it, thanks for all of your input.

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