[Giucy]

Finally, I found the right T !
Or as we say here, "I found the right shoe for my foot" (in French, j'ai trouvé chaussure à mon pied).

Since my PTSD is strongly linked to harassment, discrimination and abuse, I thought that the best bet was finding a T specialized in these issues.
Here, very few Ts get this.
And here, we have a well-reputed psychiatrist : she was the first mental health professional to teach professionals and laypeople about such issues.
However, her notoriety makes difficult to have an appointment with her, and her fees are too high for my budget.
I also knew that she could not be the only mental health professional to treat all French victims of such issues, so she necessarily has colleagues to whom she can refers patients.
So, I called for asking a referral to one of her colleagues.

The psychiatrist I was referred to did not take new patients, but referred me to someone else.
After a short interview, I made my first appointment with him. Now, I have had four sessions with him and I can say that it leads to good progress

Good progresses means :
1) I understand that the discrimination and harassment I went through was not my fault. I already knew it by self-teaching, not thanks to therapy.
However, previous Ts were in the mindset of either "you must have done something to get it" or "indirect discrimination doesn't exist and legal complaints are only for bad people seeking revenge". I am lucky to know how to spot and name BS for what it is, because such attitude can be very damaging. Especially when Ts feel obliged to give wrong legal advice they are unqualified for and then, they get at length to tell you how sick/non-compliant you are for refusing to follow their advice. On the top of it, they tell you how much you refuse people who disagree with you because your refusal to follow their advice means you'll be always unhappy. (BS of course)
Finally, I met a T being a T

2) Finally I found a shrink who really helps me instead of wanting to make his therapeutic "church" win rather than treating a patient ! He told me last session that "sometimes, we need more than one therapeutic technique to treat a specific issue", and I added "same as we need more than one anti-retroviral med to treat HIV".
No one would tell a HIV patient "if one molecule is not enough, it's because you didn't want to try hard enough and you're too stupid to understand its benefits".
However, when one therapeutic technique was not enough, previous Ts were quick to assign all the blame on me for "not wanting to try hard and understand its benefits, and being in denial of your issues because it could not be possible to have accurate self-knowledge when you're so sick".
If I was such in denial of my issues as ex-Ts could think, my GP would had been worried and taken any necessary action way before ex-Ts panicked over the so-called "denial of my issues" !

When I saw my T yesterday after panic attacks, he told me that he changed his mind about prescribing an AD when he saw me.
He was happy that using more than one therapeutic technique I learnt over the years was enough to cut panic attacks' roots.
He also told me that no matter what some naysayers could say or imply, a judge cannot grant guardianship just because someone has brain injury and does not want children (no matter what some judgemental people said or implied when they knew about my disability and being CF).
T allowed me to use him as a scapegoat when someone berates me about not wanting children being a sign of incapacity to consent (like the beautician I met for the first time, lecturing me about how much I'll regret not to have children when I'll be friendless exactly like her aunt when waxing my legs. With the same condescending tone as if she wanted to be my Court-appointed guardian. She received no tip after that lecture, of course)

[CANDC]

Giucy, so glad you are finding the therapist you want and need. You have done a lot of ground work on yourself. That is admirable.

Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems though still there are more manageable. There are lots of compassionate people here that can make the load lighter by sharing and caring. Feel free to participate actively at Psych Central.

Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

I'm happy for you and I hope the rest of your journey is one that leads you to heal.

[Giucy]

Thank you for your replies

Feel free to participate actively at Psych Central

One baby step at once As we say, "small streams make big rivers"

You have done a lot of ground work on yourself. That is admirable

People here are admirable for trying as hard as they can to get better, modos, members...
Getting better involves plenty of trial and error : finding the right med combo, the right T etc... If therapy X or med Y turns out to be inefficient for you, it has nothing to do with a character flaw and everything to do with tool Z/therapist U being a poor fit for you.
CBT alone can be a great therapy for some people with PTSD and being a poorer fit for others with PTSD.
We have a long way to find a style of therapy to cure every single issue to every people with mental illness !