[WrkNPrgress]

Okay, I know this is silly and I think I know the answer to this but I kinda want to get some feedback on this.

For over a year, most all of my sessions with T have been evening or weekend times. For the past 2 or 3 sessions, however, I had been using a few extra vacation days to get some daytime slots.
At my last appointment my T asked if I had daytime availability. I thought I didn't have any more vacation days, so we had to book an evening that was three weeks out. (that's kind of long for me.) I was surprised to find out her evenings were getting all booked up. I kind felt like I got scheduled out of my usual times.

Then today, I found out that I miscalculated and have some more vacation days I need to use up. I could have gone for a sooner daytime appointment after all.

My Question is this: would it be rude to ask her if those daytime slots are still available — now? The scheduled appt is just about two weeks away. Is it too late - and possibly rude- to ask to bump me up to one week?

I guess I can follow this up with perhaps a request to have regularly scheduled times. How many people here do that? How common is it to go week by week and see what's available for next time?

[eeyorestail]

I don't think it's rude at all--your schedule has opened up so you are looking for availability.

As for a regularly scheduled time, I think it's a good idea to see if one is available. I've always had a regularly scheduled time with my Ts (though not pdocs) and I find it more convenient that way.

[Chummy]

With my current T I had the same day and time every week. But now she has a new workplace. I don't now if they work with regularly scheduled times. I have only been once, not yet talked about that.

I don't think it's too late or rude to ask if you can have a sooner appointment. You can explain that you can go on a daytime appointment after all and that you rather have a session sooner.
And if it's better for you to have regularly scheduled times, then definitely talk to her about that. Lost of people have that.

[laxer12]

Go for it! The worst that could happen is your T decides to keep the original evening appointment. I'm a graduate student and I work on campus and coach a high school sports team so my schedule changes often. I've asked my T a few times to change my appointment time. I think she always keeps my evening time in her calendar but if she has an opening at another time, she almost always accommodates me. I've tried asking her to change a session a couple of days in advance (usually happens when I'm really struggling) and she respectfully tells me "let's keep what we originally scheduled for this week". And that's the end of it. You've got nothing to lose and two weeks is enough time in advance!

[WrkNPrgress]

ok. Done. Thanks for the feedback.

I am realizing that i have a bit of anxiety around contacting my T outside of session. It feels rude to bother her, even though she's assured me it's fine to text if I need something.

That's my stuff, I guess.

[Apathy123]

I don't think there is anything wrong with asking to change the appointment. Things happen and availability changes so she may or may not be able to accommodate you but you won't know without asking.

I have a standing appointment with my t and have only changed it once or twice because I had a conflict that week. It works best for me and my t to have a set schedule and most clients at her office work the same way with a set appointment every week or other week.

[WrkNPrgress]

So... it's rescheduled. Yay. It's an early morning slot, which means she gave me the first one of the day. I'm fighting the need to feel bad about her squeezing me in.

And I guess I'll just ask, "Would it be possible to set a regular meeting time?" It's funny to me this has never come up before. We always meet about once every two weeks and each and every time, at the end we have to take a few minutes while she peruses her Appointment book for a time that I can make.

It seems odd to me now that I think about it, but oh well.

[stopdog]

I have regular times with both. Sometimes I have to change because of work, but usually I can schedule around the set times.
I would call and see if a slot was available earlier if I wanted one. I would keep the night one too and tell the therapist I needed to get on a regular night schedule going forward

[wotchermuggle]

Originally Posted by WrkNPrgress

So... it's rescheduled. Yay. It's an early morning slot, which means she gave me the first one of the day. I'm fighting the need to feel bad about her squeezing me in.

And I guess I'll just ask, "Would it be possible to set a regular meeting time?" It's funny to me this has never come up before. We always meet about once every two weeks and each and every time, at the end we have to take a few minutes while she peruses her Appointment book for a time that I can make.

It seems odd to me now that I think about it, but oh well.

With a former T, I never knew week to week if I could come because sometimes he'd be booked up. I finally got up the courage to ask and I did get a regular day and time. In my case, he said yes and I think it was based on that I was his longest standing client at the time, I never cancelled, paid on time, etc. he mentioned that some people would just not show up so while he was booked, sometimes he wouldn't have clients.

Don't be too afraid of asking. Te worst case scenario is a no and you can still probably work around it.

[lostwonder]

Ask! I have two slots a week that are blocked off for me. It isn't unusual.

[WrkNPrgress]

Doh, I got so wrapped up in my last session I forgot to ask, and again as there is each time, come time to book the next appointment there's just this awkward space. She's waiting for me to tell her a good time and I'm waiting to hear her availability. It's... frankly weird. Like she doesn't want to reveal too much of her open schedule to me. Inevitably this is how the conversation goes:

T: "Ok, When would you like to come in again?"

Me: Looking at my calendar, "Oh let's say in two weeks...?"

(Silence while I wait for her to offer a day...)

Me: "I'm free Tues - Friday...pretty much any time..."

.....awkward silence.... while she just kind of stares at her book.

T: "Ok, When is good for you?"

Me: "Oh, uh.... let's say Wed...? Daytime?"

T: "I have ...10am... 2pm... (etc.)"

I mean I guess she's just totally open and being considerate but why can't she just say, "I have X and X available on the 19th" ? Our couple counselor always books with us by stating specifically her availability, like 'I have a noon on the 23rd, or a 2pm on the 24th... " etc.

I don't know why I find that annoying. Again sometimes it feels like she's being closed off or something.

[stopdog]

What if you did it the other way from the beginning?
client:"I would like to schedule and appointment in two weeks on Wed or thurs and I am available at x, y or z times - are any of those available?"
Rather than putting the ball in her court from the beginning?