[JaneC]

It was the session today that we "said our farewells". I will have one final appointment in 10 days after I have met the new T, which is tomorrow but today, was 'IT'

I am still so surprised athow hard this farewell is for me. I know logically that him leaving before we have finished what I need to do, him leaving me and it not being my choice, has triggered deep feelings I have never addressed before. Of all the losses and leavings that have happened before.

It feels quite overwhelming.

I made him a piece of art and was really anxious to give it to him. He said it was amazing, and I told him the meaning behind it. He told me that many people will see it, and there will be many interpretations. There was a piece of it that I designed to be taken off, and held and.......anyway, he held it for a long time. He asked my permission to display it in his new office. I told him I was worried, because I wasn't sure he'd want to think of me all the time by having it......and he said, I'm going to think about you a lot anyway.

He had written me a letter, and wouldn't let me just have it, he wanted to read it to me first. I don't think I have cried so much. It was professional, but also personal and very caring.

I am so sad, and feel quite messed up.

And then there is tomorrow..........I have to meet a new therapist tomorrow, feeling like this? I need to be able to keep it all together, and I am just not sure if I can. I am so incredibly anxious to meet this lady I can not express it properly.

Support, kind words and ideas how to get through tomorrow would be sooooo helpful right now. Because I just don't feel up to anything and feel like running away. Thanks all

[stopdog]

Good luck with it.

I am so sorry you are hurting. I saw a therapist for seven months last year and he moved away. He actually told me he liked working with me so much that he considered not taking the new job, but in the end he did take it. We had a good ending and he wrote me a letter and read it to me just like yours did. I wrote him a long letter about how he impacted my life. I honestly don't really go there in my mind much because it is very painful still to have lost him. On the other hand I am grateful to have had a good ending to therapy after the horrible ending I had with the first one. It helps me see that i am not this awful, terrible person who can't "do" therapy and maybe the therapy ending wasn't my fault.

I think it will be really hard to see someone new, but if you hold on to the good of the therapy you had with him you can see that you can go through this with her too.

Really there just isn't an easy way to do any of this. I feel for you though. What you are going through reminds me so much of what I went through.

[unaluna]

Wow that sounds like a great farewell. really good things to remember in it.

[nervous puppy]

I had the same feelings of anxiety about meeting my potential new T for the first time. I too thought I had to "suck it up" and "pull it together" for the first session. Ours was more of a "meet n' greet". I must have done well because towards the end she commented on how "put together" I seemed to her. I laughed! It was all an act. I put on my "work face" and tried to approach the whole thing as a business transaction. As soon as I dropped that, I broke down.
I'm not exactly sure if you're still T shopping or not. Either way, this would be an issue for any T you see to have to work through with you. If she doesn't understand where you are at emotionally, you should probably run!

I guess I'm simply trying to say that you can (and should) use your new T to work through the grief of losing your previous T.

Good Luck!! && (fingers crossed)

[guilloche]

(((JaneC))) Just wanted to wish you good luck tomorrow with the new T. And as many hugs as you need re: your old T.

[Coco3]

This reminds me so much of my own final session with T, only a few days ago. I can feel your pain...

Good luck tomorrow.

[JaneC]

Sitting in waiting room feel like U may pass out! 1 minute til my appointment time and she.still has someone else with her!!!!

I don't like this not one little bit!!!

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How did it go?

[Open Eyes]

Hi Jane, it's been a few days, how was your new therapy session? How are you feeling now?

It may take some time to get so you "trust" this new therapist. It could be a positive that you are not seeing right now too.

((Hugs))
OE

[LadyGazelle]

I cried most of the session with my new therapist still not sure if this is a positive thing or not.

I actually gave a drawing to my therapist as a farewell gift too he seemed to like it also but gosh do I miss him.

Hope your session went well!