[stopdog]

Has the therapist ever said they found you challenging? Did you agree with the assessment? I don't have a definition of challenging in mind especially - just however you would see it.

[musinglizzy]

She never offered it, but I've said it and she agreed. The worst she's ever called me was stubborn. Several times.

[WrkNPrgress]

I've never felt that nor has it ever been said about me. But for the clietn, I don't being challenged is a bad thing at all. If something feels difficult, or out of one's comfort zone, that means change is happening. IMO.

It should be challenging for the client, at least to some degree or nothing will change.

[stopdog]

The question is not do you find therapy a challenging endeavor, but rather has the therapist or you ever found you to be a challenging client to engage with.

I was definitely a challenging client for several years, but I am not so anymore. I knew it. My T knew it. My pdoc knew it. It wasn't a mystery. My bipolar depressive and mixed episodes caused serious suicidality and multiple hospitaluzations were needed. I had to undergo ECT twice in those years. I was highly impulsive which was frightening to both my T and my pdoc. Yes, I was absolutely a challenge.

But they were both convinced I could reach greater stability and mental health. They challenged me to keep fighting, to keep working, and to keep moving forward. They were right, and I owe them my life and stability. I was very blessed to have a skilled T and pdoc who knew exactly how to face the challenge that was me and help me find my way through.

[precaryous]

I think I'm a challenging patient. My therapist has not given her opinion one way or the other.

My old T said he found me challenging and my new T said he found me challenging at first. I don't have any mental health problems as such (aside from occasional anxiety and attachment issues) and I think it is more to do with the way I challenge the counsellor. I have a relatively clear understanding of what is useful for me in therapy and what isn't, and I'll tell the therapist if I don't find what he's doing useful. T1 never quite got his head round that but T2 does know how to handle it now, so he's more comfortable with my challenging nature. I don't think I've become less challenging.

OHHHHH yes... we both know it, but he did just tell me last week that I might be 'extreme' but my issues are understandably based.

I warned him in the beginning that I was a pain in the backside and I KNOW he didn't believe me then. I think he does now...LOL.. I honestly do NOT do it on purpose and at least I think he believes that. IF I didn't think he understood that I was not on purpose, I wouldn't have stayed.

But,, your answer I a definitely sad 'yes'!

[TangerineBeam]

My previous T said that I'm a challenging client. And I believed her then, because I know I can be very needy and clingy, and I have those episodes, and I have SI...
My current T doesn't see me as challenging (yet). When I told her that I think I can be very hard to work with, she said that if the client is "challenging" mostly depends on the therapist, not the client. It's when the therapist can't handle his or her own reactions and emotions, that the process becomes challenging.

[brillskep]

My therapist has never said that to me either way, but he has said that our particular context in therapy (dual relationships) is challenging. I couldn't agree more. But we have a mostly good therapeutic relationship an we both think therapy is working very well for me.

[ruh roh]

I'm not sure if it's the same thing as challenging, but I asked my therapist if I was difficult. She had to think about it (too long, it seemed) and then said that I was not difficult, but my level despair was difficult for her, but that I'm not there to look after her feelings.

[Salmon77]

He's never said anything like that. It seems to me like a strange and potentially harmful thing for a therapist to say.

I think ex-T might have thought I was a bit challenging as I challenged her on things she said and there was quite a bit of conflict between us. I think that new T probably finds me non challenging, maybe even quite easy so far. I can't see there being the same kind of conflict between us ever as she seems to have a kind of inner wisdom.

[Chummy]

She hasn't given her opinion on that. But I think that I am. I think I'm a really difficult client.

Weird that you'd ask this question today, Stopdog. Yesterday, my therapist very cautiously let me know that I can be hard to reach when I flip into my "masochistic" self. We talked about how when I get into that negative frame of mind, nothing she says seems to penetrate the wall of negativity and self-hatred that I've erected around myself. I can debate (very skillfully, I might add) her attempts to persuade me that I might not be seeing things clearly; even her best attempts fail when I'm in that place, and I can completely resist her attempts to help me see myself and/or behavior through a different (less harsh) lens. It kind of goes back to the thread currently going on in the forum about Core Beliefs. My core belief about my darkness and ugliness inside must have been formed sooooo early in life that no amount of persuasive cognitive challenges about the failure or wrongness of this belief has any effect on it.

My therapist didn't use the word "challenging" or "difficult", but I think what she was telling me is that it is really hard to work with someone who is so entrenched in their negative thinking. I know that I'm not always in that "part" of myself (I'm not DID but I am someone who feels that I'm fragmented in my self-identity) and when I'm not in that harsh, critical part of myself, the part that is determined to view me as the lowest piece of scum on the earth, I am quite positive and willing to try new and different things. I can SEE my good qualities when I'm not in that angry/downtrodden self and I know that I able a capable and accomplished person. But when in a "relationship", or trying to connect on a deeper level, that negative, prickly self makes an appearance and pushes anyone who is trying to get close far, far away. It's my defense. It's my fortress. The positive me sure wishes that negative self would take a freakin' vacation!!!! Permanently!

[BayBrony]

I fear I am challenging but my has repeatedly said I an actually a very special and rewarding client. I have lots of issues and neediness BUT I work very very hard, face the truth head on, listen to her, am willing to try new ideas etc
I.like that she thinks those things though I am not always sure I believe her.

[PinkFlamingo99]

I think I'm very self -destructive and have a hard time moving away from that, but I am also very agreeable, hardly ever get mad, easygoing. On the negative side I'm frequently in crisis, suicidal impulses or SI to the point of stitches. So to be honest, I'm not entirely sure. I do know at one point my old therapist said "most people who come see me get better, but you never seem to get better."

[Perna]

I think by definition one would be challenging being in therapy or one wouldn't have some of the troubles I have to begin with. I do remember we were talking about my stepmother and what a piece of work she was and my T pointed out I was probably not the easiest child to raise.

[SoupDragon]

Yes, contract re-negotiated to "contain" me.

[divine1966]

No. And I don't think she ever had a reason to think I am a challenging client. I am usually an easy person to deal with.

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[pbutton]

I can't think of anything that would make me particularly challenging, at least not in comparison to others with the same issues.

I'm sure I am a very boring, garden variety of patient. I would love to think that I'm challenging but I know I'm not.

[JustShakey]

My T has never called me challenging - he has said that he 'enjoys' me. I take that to mean that I'm enough of a challenge to be entertaining but not so much that I'm overwhelmed and draining.
Like Brony I have a lot of work to do but I want to face it head on. I want to live my life, and not always be feeling like I need someone to take care of me.

[Leah123]

I said something relatively early on, self-disparaging, about being difficult, and she said "You are a challenge I enjoy!" and later that I was her favorite client.

I believed it. My most difficult parts are the ones I hide best, so frankly, the fact that she's seen them is a compliment, a sign of the quality of our work and our relationship.

[RedSun]

I often apologise to T for being difficult, demanding, manipulative etc.
She sort of says something nice without saying anything iykwim