i told him a bit about the other people in my head but they didnt exactly want me too and now they are mad and i am starting to think they are right because they dont think i should trust him and i am usually careful what i tell him and now i am nervous that something bad will happen because i told him and i am starting to get scared again because i have been trying so hard to look normal because they think we cant trust anyone and i agree mostly but i am worried i have ruined everything and i feel guilty because what if i have done something that will impact on them i dont care if i get in trouble but i will feel bad if they do because of something i did.

[Leah123]

You know, I totally understand the desire to "look normal," and it's a valid fear about looking different/troubled, but... if what you want to be is better, to feel better and more at peace, I think the risk you took is a necessary one, because we can't be helped too well if we aren't honest. He won't want to hurt you or the voices either way, really. I'm sure he'll want to help.

but they think he will. i dont want to keep feeling bad but it isnt just my decision not when there are other people involved.

[Victoria'smom]

You are very brave to speak about them. Someone needs to trust him for you to get better.

I just worry that what if they are right and everyone else is wrong and maybe there is nothing wrong with me and everyone does want to hurt me and what if i start talking about them with my psychologist and then thery are right and he hurts us because they seem very sure but i am not sure about anything.

[lostwonder]

Eden hon. I've been in your shoes. You don't have to talk about them any further if you don't want to. I have found my life to be so much easier when I only share what they say it is ok to share. If your T is trustworthy, then the others will come to know that with time and you may have trouble getting them to shut up. No is a compete sentence and your T should respect that

I guess it is just hard because 2 of them have different opinions and one of them wants me to tell but the other doesnt and says that the other one wants to trick me and i dont know who to believe but maybe i should keep it to myself and then he cant hurt me the problem is it doesnt matter if he is trustworthy because i also feel like everyone else mostly health care workers are controled be someone evil it is hard to explain i just dont know what to do.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by eden1515

I guess it is just hard because 2 of them have different opinions and one of them wants me to tell but the other doesnt and says that the other one wants to trick me and i dont know who to believe but maybe i should keep it to myself and then he cant hurt me the problem is it doesnt matter if he is trustworthy because i also feel like everyone else mostly health care workers are controled be someone evil it is hard to explain i just dont know what to do.

Wow. When did you discover you have DID. You never mentioned it before.

I didnt know i have never been diagnosed with that as i haven't ever mentioned it to anyone until my psych appointment yesterday but he didnt say anything because he wanted me to do the test thing.

I've had the same internal struggles. As I became more integrated, the split of parts quietened.
Talking about them helped me.

Maybe this has been something that has been going on for a very long time like since i was little so i dont know but the people have changed over time.

It starts in childhood. The voices begun in Adolescence.
Is not schizophrenia or DID.

I never said it was either but i am not sure exactly what you mean.

I just know for as long as i can remember i have never been alone in my head.

What don't you understand?

all of what you said. You said it starts in childhood but you didnt say what you meant by that and then you saod the voices begun in adolescence but i wasnt talking about the voices at all in this thread and then you said "is not schizophrenia or DID" what is "is not" and i never said i had either of thoes things i was asking if i should have told my psychologist about the other people in my head i really dont understand any of what you said.

[Sonorotto]

Originally Posted by eden1515

I guess it is just hard because 2 of them have different opinions and one of them wants me to tell but the other doesnt and says that the other one wants to trick me and i dont know who to believe but maybe i should keep it to myself and then he cant hurt me the problem is it doesnt matter if he is trustworthy because i also feel like everyone else mostly health care workers are controled be someone evil it is hard to explain i just dont know what to do.

Wow Eden you are truely brave! Take a deep breath, make some tea, have a soak in the tub. Try and relax. We know this is weird but get out a pad of paper and write out your pro's and cons regarding what to discuss. Yeah, have a meeting of the minds. Open things up for discussion with yourselves. As others have said in this post he wants to help you. Thats why he choose to do what he does. Just give it some time. And be strong. you dont have to decide whether to continue with this worker right now, do you? Are you allowed to switch if you feel uncomfortable with the directions your conversations are going?
We are all here to support you! (Altho, there does seem to be negative energy coming from one of the posters...tune them out if it is just getting you upset. You dont need anymore confusion
Take care, peace

OK. Now I'm confused

Originally Posted by eden1515

i told him a bit about the other people in my head but they didnt exactly want me too and now they are mad and i am starting to think they are right because they dont think i should trust him and i am usually careful what i tell him and now i am nervous that something bad will happen because i told him and i am starting to get scared again because i have been trying so hard to look normal because they think we cant trust anyone and i agree mostly but i am worried i have ruined everything and i feel guilty because what if i have done something that will impact on them i dont care if i get in trouble but i will feel bad if they do because of something i did.

I think therapy is a leap of faith, we don't know if we are in safe hands, we have to hope we are. i think taking risks in therapy can be really helpful.

Originally Posted by _Mouse

OK. Now I'm confused

I'm sorry I just don't understand what you meant by the comment like none of it made sense to me like I don't know what you are referring to with it.

Originally Posted by Brown Owl

I think therapy is a leap of faith, we don't know if we are in safe hands, we have to hope we are. i think taking risks in therapy can be really helpful.

I guess so but I am just worried like is it worth them being mad at me or the possible risk for maybe the possibility of talking about them once like I don't know I just don't know if it is something he should know(assuming he doesn't want to hurt me) or if he does want to hurt me and I should keep closed up.

It all sounds very frightening. I think you're brave for even considering sharing with another person (your psychologist). I hope whatever you end up doing works out for you.

[growlycat]

The more you tell your T, the more he/she can help you. Without your input, they can fumble around for a long time.

I just don't know what to think I am so tired as well the constant back and forth and my head won't stop and I just can't sleep in general I just don't know if I can completely believe that he doesn't want to hurt me.

[Gavinandnikki]

Be well.

I dont know what to do or who to trust ugh my head wont stop.