Do you like to have the therapist call you by name?

I voted other because the only thing that would bother me is if he/she called me by some other name. I do notice that I will purposefully address any therapist I've worked with by their name when speaking about something I feel is really important to me. I think I do it for emphasis.

I don't think I have ever said the woman's name. She uses mine several times at each appointment but I have never had cause to use hers.
I have no problem with my name, or if someone is calling to me to get my attention, but in a situation where there are only two people, I have no idea why it would be necessary or advisable.

I read your response after posting mine. Wow, makes me think, considering my need to always be in control, that I use the therapist's name to "have power over them." Certainly goes with my personality!

Other, because it has never happened. People don't address each other by first name in my language, unless they need to call someone's attention or indicate whom they are speaking to. The exception being salespeople, and I dislike it when they address me by name, it's an artificial and foreign intimacy marker which doesn't work. The only person who addresses me by name is my best friend who is American, and he pronounces it in English which is different from the two different native pronunciations - I don't mind him doing it, because it is part of his language and culture, and as an intimacy marker I'm not repulsed by that specific person using it. However, even though we speak English to each other, T has never addressed me by name (except in writing) or in any other way. It does not seem like a natural thing for him to do. I have sometimes wondered how he would pronounce my name.

Ursula K LeGuin is an excellent writer not least because she has the ability to look beyond what is an obvious part of her own culture - using names when talking to people - and realise that it is not inherent to all communication everywhere...

If you really wanted to know, I could respond to this at length (it is something I've done research on, as have many other people). The short answer is: People, in cultures where it is done, may do it for a number of very different reasons. If it is not necessary or useful for somebody, there is no inherent necessity for it. You are not alone in finding it useless or puzzling. Personally, since I've worked so much with it, I kind of wish it were an option here because I do see uses for it for myself.

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Interesting...

When I think about it, my T never used my name in the beginning, but now T tends to use my name.
I wonder why? Hm.

Personally, I don't care either way.

My T usually only says my name when he is trying to make a point. Like he will say "twistedangel" like he is exasperated. It just makes me giggle. LOL

Yes. I like it when he uses my name. he has only done it a couple times though. i wish he would do it more. I feel acknowledged and it adds a personal effect. hard to explain. i am not sure what warrants him using my name in certain convo's as opposed to others. i dont disassociate. i am guessing when he wants me to reveal a bit more than i would like. and it has worked. i have felt comfortable enough to answer.

Did you know that her parents were anthropologists? I think that growing up with the knowledge that her own culture was not the center of the universe gives her writing a lot of depth and universality. I'm glad you appreciate her, too.

I like it, but my T doesn't call me by my name often. Only when she tries to get my attention back.

I find anyone I am talking to already saying my name "shocking". I usually am not expecting it and feel like I've been caught out or something, look over my soulder, that sort of behavior If someone starts with my name and a question or something, that's okay but just randomly inserting my name into a conversation tends to jar me.

I am a preschool teacher, so I hear my name all day long-doesn't bother me. My T generally uses it to greet me, and I noticed when she used it once in session last week to try and get me out of the funk I was spiraling in.

I put other. I don't actually care whether T uses my name or not. However, when she does use my name, it catches my attention and I seem to focus more sharply on what she's saying. Mostly my T doesn't use my name, and I'm good with that.

I have major self esteem issues so sometimes I just don't like hearing my name come out of other people's mouth's period. It makes me feel disgusting (CSA related).

My therapist has used my name once, that I recall.

The first time was actually a bit jarring because she was expressing empathy about an upsetting situation, but she addressed me as if I were a child... specifically speaking to the 'little girl' and called me her 'Little (WrkNPrgess)". I don't know that I minded, and in fact felt some emotion from it, but I think I gave her a look, because she hasn't done it since.

She might have used my name speaking to me directly once or twice since, as an adult, as well. In those cases, it was fine. I didn't think one way or another. However, I feel a bit odd in general when people use my name because, well, it IS direct attention isn't it? It brings up a lot self-conscious feelings on a subtle level for me any time, with anyone.

Another thought about this is; I don't address my T by her name directly, at all.

This actually bothers me a bit. Why not? I'm not practiced at calling people by their names. I'm not good at that kind of conversation in general. Now I want to figure out a way to do so. It seems impersonal. We have conversation twice a month for almost two years and I've never said, "Well, ______(T), this is what I think..."

My T said my name today actually, to pull me back from somewhere. It does work, because it seems to speak to my adult iykwim.

I'm curious Mast - I certainly find it useful for me...

My T has a nickname for me so she rarely uses my given name. She uses the nickname if she needs my attention though. "Bay! Are you listening? "

T has occasionally used my name..the first couple of sessions she used my full name. The only person who ever called me that was my dad so I really don't like it...so I asked her to please call me by my nickname. So she has always called me that...however, she rarely uses my name.
I honestly don't care one way or the other.

I voted yes.... I guess it really doesn't matter, but I'm used to people using my name in my job primarily. Usually my T will say "Hi Lizzy, c'mon in!" when she comes out to the waiting room. Othertimes she'll use it when I'm kinda zoning out.

My T doesn't do it often so I notice it every time that she does. It is almost always when she is trying to tell me something she really thinks I need to hear. I tune in much more when she says it because then I know she is being serious and wants me to really understand what she is saying to me.

I'm glad she doesn't use it too often though.

I have DID. Each of us loves it when t calls us by name and recognizes who she is talking to. She is really good at it. Our body's name just feels s foreign to us; its nice when she uses our "real" names.

I think I've only heard him say my name a few times in a couple of years. I've never said his name to him. I don't know which name to use - his legal name is one but he likes to be known by another.

We both use each others name. I remember reading somewhere that using a person's name encourages them to like you.

If someone is going to address me, I want them to use my name. Better than "hey you". And only my fiance uses nicknames for me. It's weird when he addresses me by my first name.