Sanitary towel.

Taking about how I use to fall in love with the mum in 'lost in space'. I asked T was that normal to fall in love with TV mums? T said, no. If a child had a loving mother they would not feel the need to find love else where.
I told T how that felt like a dirty secret. How I'd be fantasizing about her sitting alone in the sofa then I'd hear my mum in the kitchen and the reality of who my mum was, didn't feel soothing as daydreaming about the TV mum.

I sat silent for a while. T asked where is gone? I said, a used sanitary towel has come to mind. That's how my mum made me feel. You know how you'd feel of you saw one lying in the street. Disgust etc. T said, that's interesting. You feel you shouldn't have been born. I said, yeah I guess.
Funny how the mind throws up image associations to match feelings.