[Focus62]

Has anyone does this? Left your session without the intention of actually leaving? I didn't storm out in anger, but I needed to get outside, the flashback was so intense and outside is often the only place I feel truly safe. And the sun, wind, temperature, birds...they help to ground me. So without warning I just got up and walked out. I didn't say anything to T (she did realize I was either flashing back or dissociating though). She did follow me (I think she asked "Where are you going?" but I'm not entirely sure) - not closely because she knew that would freak me out - but I think she didn't feel right leaving me alone? So while I sat on the parking lot curb trying to figure out life, she stood nearby, waiting for me to receive her... eventually we returned inside, once I was feeling calmer.

Has this, or something similar, ever happened to anyone?

The only time I remember this happening was actually in group. Something was going on that was triggering for me and I needed to get where I couldn't hear. I didn't go far -- just to the front step. My therapist came out to check on me, and once he was sure I was okay, just needing some space, he just asked me to return to the room when I was ready.

[AnxiousGirl]

Hasnt happened but I wish it would. There are SO many times I would sit in the office in so much pain mentally because of the topic/exposure my T and I do and the urge to leave is so intense but for some reason I just sit there taking the pain and pretending like I'm perfectly fine. I dont know why this is though, I dont think my T will get upset or anything, I'm just afraid to show/admit that I feel emotions or something. I have a session tomorrow and I promised myself if I do feel anything like this to ask if I can step out for a second or two.

Yes, this has happened to me several times. The first time was with my first long term therapist, three months in. She asked a questioned that triggered me unexpectedly & I stood up,said something to her in a dissociated state and left, walking home 2 miles and leaving my car in her parking lot. Very disconcerting.

The second time was after she retired ( a year & a half in) & referred me to her partner. He left mid-session to answer a call from an insurance company, closing the door after him. All I remember is being anxious & agitated about the door being shut. I remember getting up & checking to see if he had door locked the door on me but apparently I ended up leaving & walking home. Very scary. These wet a few early incidents in my therapy that were disturbing but now understandable.

Now, I have times when things get "foggy" or hazy or time seems to extend outward in a weird way, but I'm able to recognize what's happening & often I can voice what's happening as it occurred. But that doesn't make it any less disturbing or unsettling. For me it is truly a "therapy" triggering thing because I have been able to function in a fast paced professional career without interruption pretty much all my life. I am very good at compartmentalizing, but in spite of that being a good thing for me professionally & financially it has been devastating for me personally & intimately. There are wounds no matter how we try to manage or cover up.

Yes, once I was stuck in a dissociative state of a 12 year old and couldn't switch back, so T took me outside for a walk as the room seemed too overwhelming. It lasted 10 minutes, and we went back inside when i was myself again. I was sad about going outside as that was actually fun being in that state and I didn't want it to end. But being outside somehow brought me back.

Originally Posted by Focus62

Has anyone does this? Left your session without the intention of actually leaving? I didn't storm out in anger, but I needed to get outside, the flashback was so intense and outside is often the only place I feel truly safe. And the sun, wind, temperature, birds...they help to ground me. So without warning I just got up and walked out. I didn't say anything to T (she did realize I was either flashing back or dissociating though). She did follow me (I think she asked "Where are you going?" but I'm not entirely sure) - not closely because she knew that would freak me out - but I think she didn't feel right leaving me alone? So while I sat on the parking lot curb trying to figure out life, she stood nearby, waiting for me to receive her... eventually we returned inside, once I was feeling calmer.

Has this, or something similar, ever happened to anyone?

Yes, recently. Except I had to do what I use to do as a child. Wall and walk.
T for the first time in 12yrs wrote an email the next day saint she hopes I was OK.

[junkDNA]

my T used to take me for walks outside if i was dissociating. many of our early sessions i spent dissociated.. sitting on his couch, not talking, a lot of the time with my eyes closed. while we were walking he would joke around and be silly. it did help to bring me back

[doogie]

Yes. I was triggered (unintentionally) by my therapist and I had to leave the room. Actually, I totally the left the session early. I couldn't return that day because my emotions were so out of control. I contacted my therapist later to apologize, and she not only understood, but was proud of me for standing up for myself and taking action to take care of myself in that moment. What I felt she would see as 'running away' she saw as strength and standing up for my needs. It was an interesting perspective shift for me. Good luck.

I think I did twice, with different T's. I'd sit down just outside the door of the room we were talking in. The first time was in a meeting with a 'lot' of people (pdoc, case manager, nurse of the residential ward I was staying and nurse of the crisis ward I'd stayed that weekend), no one followed me out, after a couple of minutes I returned to the room.
The second time I'm not sure what happened or who were present exactly, but my T followed me out and we sat on the floor of the hallway together for a few minutes.

I also walked out of physical therapy once, because the physical therapist did something that majorly triggered me. I said something like "I'm want to stop for today - we have an appointment for next Monday - bye". Next session she asked me what had happened, whether she'd done something wrong.