[dancinglady]

I was in therapy for close to 34 years. I guess I learned everything right to say to a therapist. I am doing a short term employee assistance program with a brand new just out of PhD school therapist. She is so naïve and has no life experience. When she asks a question I just tell her what I know she wants to hear and she just lights up like a Christmas tree. I am only going there for support so no harm done. I can get support from anyone mostly but it is nice to have someone who is trained. Her lack of experience just screams inability to really help anyone. Hope she only gets cases like me because she could do some real damage to anyone just starting therapy. She is asking questions that no first timer would know the answer to.

I actually read her body language and she defended herself like there was no tomorrow. She has already been supervised but experience is all that she needs at this point. She has not picked up on my real diagnosis and I do not plan to show any signs. This EAP is through my employer so I have to be very careful about what I say. I am doing good from my perspective and getting what I need which is all that counts right????

Wow I guess I really have graduated from therapy. I guess I got everything there was to get out of it already. Support is all that is left. Oh well.

[Salmon77]

I'm a bit confused as to why you're seeing this T at all, and granted she may be young and naïve, but--I don't see how you can expect anyone to help you or have any insight if you hide your issues and don't tell them the truth about things.

[Skeezyks]

The Skeezyks estimates the longest he was in therapy was perhaps 3 or 4 months... So I salute you for sticking with it for 34 years, dancinglady! You may not be gaining much from this newbie, beyond support. But I would guess she's learning a thing or two from you. I guess everyone has to start somewhere. She's probably fortunate to have you...

[stopdog]

If support is something that is useful, then I don't see a problem. I have never found a therapist to be any good at insight regardless of honesty from me.

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I was in therapy for close to 34 years. I guess I learned everything right to say to a therapist. I am doing a short term employee assistance program with a brand new just out of PhD school therapist. She is so naïve and has no life experience. When she asks a question I just tell her what I know she wants to hear and she just lights up like a Christmas tree. I am only going there for support so no harm done. I can get support from anyone mostly but it is nice to have someone who is trained. Her lack of experience just screams inability to really help anyone. Hope she only gets cases like me because she could do some real damage to anyone just starting therapy. She is asking questions that no first timer would know the answer to.

I actually read her body language and she defended herself like there was no tomorrow. She has already been supervised but experience is all that she needs at this point. She has not picked up on my real diagnosis and I do not plan to show any signs. This EAP is through my employer so I have to be very careful about what I say. I am doing good from my perspective and getting what I need which is all that counts right????

Wow I guess I really have graduated from therapy. I guess I got everything there was to get out of it already. Support is all that is left. Oh well.

Really? Your seem to lack Any real empathy. Telling T's what you think they want to hear? You think they can't hear what you don't say?

[PinkFlamingo99]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

Really? Your seem to lack Any real empathy. Telling T's what you think they want to hear? You think they can't hear what you don't say?

I don't really think they have mind-reading powers. wpuldn't it be more useful to be honest though?

[here today]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

Really? Your seem to lack Any real empathy. Telling T's what you think they want to hear? You think they can't hear what you don't say?

I just want to say the OP didn't strike me that way. I think it makes good sense to evaluate, if you can, what a T is likely to be able to do for you, to give you, and what they likely can't. You can share more later if the sense of trust builds. Otherwise, after 34 years of trying already, why open things up if they're not likely to be resolved.

[stopdog]

I think a good number of therapists have no clue what a client is saying nor do they know if a client is telling the truth or not. The ones I have known have not heard what I did not say. Most of the time they didn't hear what I actually said either.

[Piickles]

If she's just out of school she's still learning... Experience doesn't just appear suddenly. Of course she is going to make mistakes in order to learn. I'm guessing that's why they tell you when you are seeing someone who is fresh out of school and why their fee increases the older and wiser they get. You have been made aware of her inexperience, she's not claiming to be someone she's not. Only so much you can learn from supervision, lectures and from text books. I'd say she's doing her best with the knowledge she has - everyone needs to start somewhere. Telling her what you think she needs to hear may make her feel good, but it's not going to learn or help her to help others.

[stopdog]

I feel no responsibility to help a therapist learn how to help others.

Originally Posted by PinkFlamingo99

I don't really think they have mind-reading powers. wpuldn't it be more useful to be honest though?

Is that what you understood from my reply? That I'm saying a T is a mind reader?

That's not what hearing what's not said means. Plus honesty can only Happen if one is fully conscious of all material. . Clients don't mean to lie. They're presenting what they can. If material is unconscious, than they can't fully present.

[glitches]

I love that newbies wouldn't know the answer to her questions

[nottrustin]

So you are in it for fun? of course she won't handle things right or come up with an accurate diagnosis. If you are purposely providing what you think she wants to hear instead of the truth of course she will be wrong. It is like giving somebody some pieces of multiple puzzles and expecting them to get the right picture. What therapists actually want to hear is the truth.

[divine1966]

Is this court ordered? Or job mandated? I don't see any purpose in pretending? Do you find it useful? in what way? I understand just going for support but if you only say things you think she wants to hear how is she supporting you?

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[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by stopdog

I think a good number of therapists have no clue what a client is saying nor do they know if a client is telling the truth or not. The ones I have known have not heard what I did not say. Most of the time they didn't hear what I actually said either.