[itjustis]

My T knows I have strong attachment and maternal issues with her, but I've yet to talk about it in detail. (Something that I will bring up next session because it's becoming too much.) After admitting my feelings of attachment T mentions her daughter in almost every session...unless it's something I'm only just picking up on now? I'm not sure if she keeps bringing it up on purpose to hit a nerve and to get me to crack open or if it's her issues creeping in?
T is old enough to be my mother and her daughter is similar age.


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[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by itjustis

My T knows I have strong attachment and maternal issues with her, but I've yet to talk about it in detail. (Something that I will bring up next session because it's becoming too much.) After admitting my feelings of attachment T mentions her daughter in almost every session...unless it's something I'm only just picking up on now? I'm not sure if she keeps bringing it up on purpose to hit a nerve and to get me to crack open or if it's her issues creeping in?
T is old enough to be my mother and her daughter is similar age.


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A T should not mention her family so often.

[Argonautomobile]

I somehow doubt she's bringing it up on purpose to hit a nerve. That seems pretty passive-aggressive. I would guess it's either unconscious on her part, or you're just now noticing it more. You could always ask.

[LonesomeTonight]

If it's making you uncomfortable, I'd talk about it. I doubt she's doing it on purpose. Though it's possible there's some countertransference going on, like maybe she's thinking of you in a maternal way. So she's subconsciously referring to her daughter.

As for whether it's appropriate for a T to talk about their own family, my T rarely does it, but my marriage counselor does it all the time, mainly to relate to something we're talking about. Though it can be difficult on occasion because I do have some paternal (and some erotic) transference for him. Like a couple months ago, he mentioned he was going on a trip with his daughter to look at colleges, like I think just the two of them, and I felt a twinge of jealousy. But definitely mention it.

[musinglizzy]

Originally Posted by itjustis

My T knows I have strong attachment and maternal issues with her, but I've yet to talk about it in detail. (Something that I will bring up next session because it's becoming too much.) After admitting my feelings of attachment T mentions her daughter in almost every session...unless it's something I'm only just picking up on now? I'm not sure if she keeps bringing it up on purpose to hit a nerve and to get me to crack open or if it's her issues creeping in?
T is old enough to be my mother and her daughter is similar age.

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Yep....I totally get this! I finally got to the point where I had to ASK my T not to bring up her daughter so much in my therapy.

[Bipolar Warrior]

My uni therapist compares me to her own children all the time, or talks about them in relation to something that's going on with me. She'll often tell me about how she loves her own children as an example of how my parents should have loved me. It is somewhat difficult to hear her talk about it, but I think I understand what she is doing. Sort of.

I did ask her, just a couple of weeks ago, if part of it is her trying to make me angry about the way I've been treated by my parents, but she says it isn't. She says she is trying to give me a different perspective. She is usually very honest with me, so I probably have no reason to doubt what she is saying.

I'm sorry this is so hard for you right now. It is definitely worth bringing up in your next session, to hear what she has to say about it as well as expressing your own feelings on the matter. It is a tough subject, but I hope you will be able to have a productive conversation about it.