[Lucinda]

Ive been seeing my T for over a year now and still find it hard to talk to him, get upset or do anything other be in a child place just enjoy his company .

In the past few months i have been having group t/A and the lady who runs it is good offering contact if and when your eady for it, it has been somthing that i feel i have responded well to being able to come from a child place sat on the floor and have the contact has really helped me. i am able to say how i feel but often from a 3 yr old place.
My t doesnt do this you reamin in the adult and talk to himas an adult mantain eye contact. i really struggle with it i have got alot from him the consistancy and honesty and i like the guy i dont doubt he is a good t but maybe its just not for me

or am i finding it hard and am just running away? how healthy is it to spend your sessions as a child?do you grow out of it the group only runs till september

I have asked my t about sitiing on the flor i have said how i feel but he feels his way is the right way to go and i dont doubt he does think it is best

I havent had T/A before or had anyone that is happy with me coming from a child place so i dont know how helpful on the whole it is and if i found somene that would give me the same therpay indivually as i get in the group would that set me back. If you are a child in therpay do you naturally move on?

Stuck

Lucy

[sidony]

Hi Lucy,

I'm not sure I totally understand your post. What is T/A? I'm familiar with group therapy but not with that abbreviation.

What do you mean when you say you come from a child place? Do you limit your language to the vocabulary a child might use? How old are you in real life? Why do you prefer to act younger? Do you listen the way a child would? Or do you listen as an adult?

My guess is that your therapist thinks it isn't helpful for you to act in that manner. Maybe it's enabling you to avoid interacting as you need? In real life, you won't be able to play a child so he may think it's not beneficial to act that part in therapy.

I wish I understood your post better.

Sidony

[Perna]

Lucy, is T/A transactional analysis? http://changingminds.org/explanations/behaviors/ta.htm

I don't think you are supposed to literally "be" a child, it's kind of like role play? That's fine but I don't know that it's "therapy" which is what one uses to work on one's self from where they are now, as an adult. We can't "be" children again and though acting out situations that way might give us helpful insights into how we got where we are, there's nothing to "resolve" there because we don't have our whole selves?

I don't see you as running away from anything, I think role play in a situation you're "familiar" with is "easier" than sticking it out as an adult and learning to make your thoughts and wishes known in real, present time with another real person.

I don't see any "conflict" in doing the two different types of work but I also don't see any reason to just choose one over the other as if they were comparable and it was only a matter of taste. They have very different goals I think and, especially if your group T/A thing is over in September, that isn't "going" anywhere into your very real future? To me, T/A is more like a "course" one would take to understand background better and where you and others might be coming from but not too helpful if you stay in just one of the roles. Humans aren't just one thing or another, but all the roles, a "child" wouldn't be able to have this actual problem you're expressing :-) and be able to conceive of it as you do. Your adult self is very much alive and well, working to try and "balance" you and I think that is what your therapist you've been seeing for a year is doing also.