[LittlePage]

Ok so I went in for my appointment a few months ago to see my psychiatrist for a med refill. He has his own office and his wife is the office manager. I arrived like 8 minutes early and from the hallway I could hear him yelling at his wife about another patients chart and diagnosis. They have a small waiting room so I opened the door to peak in. They were in his office with the door shut. He was really angry and she was yelling back. I tried to make it obvious that I was there. I pulled the door shut loudly and then stepped back out. I re-entered and opened it as loud as I could and cleared my throat. The yelling softened for a moment and then the office door opened. His wife came out with tears in her eyes. They both pretending like nothing was going on or happened.

Since then I have been having a really hard time seeing him. In fact Im kinda angry towards him. My father would get drunk at yell at my mother and us kids growing up and that is all I can see in him now.

I don't want to have to start all over with a new psychiatrist since its easy just going in for med checks but every time I go back I have less and less respect for him.

I can certainly understand how you feel that way especially with bad memories of your own families resurfacing.

Have you considered telling him that you were very uncomfortable and angry by the argument/their behavior in the office?

My pdoc and his wife have a similar work arrangement although they have other staff, too. It took me a few years to realize they were even married. They kept everything very professional and still do.

I hope that this works out for you in the best way possible. It's kind of like you're between a rock and a hard place. You're there for mental health care but your doctor is screaming at his wife. Fights happen - but the office is not the venue for it.

That said, we are all human. If he is helping you, then I'd clear the air and bring it up, or just let it go with the hopes of no further incidences. I'd do whichever is more comfortable for you. You could always asked to be referred out if the situation was just too over the top. Do what's best for you!

[LittlePage]

They are nice. But they can be frustrating. I had to have a psych eval for weightloss surgery which he did for me. But they lost it and I had to do the whole eval a second time. I followed him to a new practice because I had been seeing him but they are just so dysfunctional.

[annielovesbacon]

I know it's hard to start over with someone new, but that's what I would recommend. Even if he has never treated you poorly, how someone treats someone else can be an indicator of how he might treat you.
For instance, my next door neighbor owns a driving school. When I was 15 I overheard him in his backyard screaming at his wife. His school is the only one in my hometown and I HAD to go to him to learn how to drive (my parents were not able to teach me themselves). At first it was fine, but when I started actually driving, if I would make a mistake more than once he lost his temper with me. I remembered how he yelled at his wife and I would get really scared. It really affected how I drove.
I'm really sorry this happened to you, especially that it reminds you of your dad. I hope everything will work out for you.

[ThisWayOut]

Yelling is a huge trigger for me. I probably would have stayed for the session out of fear (similar triggering around dad things), but I'm not sure I would ever go back. I'm also not sure that session would have been useful as I would probably have been severely dissociated... I'm sorry you witnessed that.

[Unrigged64072835]

That's rather unprofessional. Just because they are married doesn't give him carte blanche to abuse her while they're at work. (Or at all, really.) Yelling is a big trigger for me as well.

[LittlePage]

Originally Posted by annielovesbacon

I know it's hard to start over with someone new, but that's what I would recommend. Even if he has never treated you poorly, how someone treats someone else can be an indicator of how he might treat you.
For instance, my next door neighbor owns a driving school. When I was 15 I overheard him in his backyard screaming at his wife. His school is the only one in my hometown and I HAD to go to him to learn how to drive (my parents were not able to teach me themselves). At first it was fine, but when I started actually driving, if I would make a mistake more than once he lost his temper with me. I remembered how he yelled at his wife and I would get really scared. It really affected how I drove.
I'm really sorry this happened to you, especially that it reminds you of your dad. I hope everything will work out for you.

I know what what you mean. I kinda fear him yelling at me now.

[LittlePage]

Originally Posted by ThisWayOut

Yelling is a huge trigger for me. I probably would have stayed for the session out of fear (similar triggering around dad things), but I'm not sure I would ever go back. I'm also not sure that session would have been useful as I would probably have been severely dissociated... I'm sorry you witnessed that.

Thankfully it was just for a med check. I actually started seeing a therapist separate from him. Not because of that incident but my anxiety was growing out of control and I didn't feel comfortable discussing it with him.

[jeremiahgirl]

Yelling is also a trigger for me, when I was younger my step dad hated me & my twin he would yell curse words at us as we walked in front of the TV he was viewing. Plus he'd yell & fight with my mom, so as soon as I hear voices escalating the anxiety rises .

It's very unprofessional to yell in any office, but a psych office is down right scary! In situations like that I'd panic and maybe cry. I'd have a serious thinking period (by myself) wondering if I should return. Posting ones opinion on the experience on line would maybe cause them to seek some help themselves. I'm sorry you witnessed that my friend.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[annielovesbacon]

Originally Posted by LittlePage

I know what what you mean. I kinda fear him yelling at me now.

It's not right for you to be afraid of your pdoc. I hope you are able to find someone new to go to!