[runlola72]

So I haven't been religious ever, really. I've dabbled I guess. In Buddhism, Unitarian Universalism... but not so much anything else. In recent months I have felt a renewed interest in trying to have some sort of relationship with God. T is a Christian, and very anchored in his faith. Recently, I asked T to pray for me, and he said he has never been asked that before but he said he would do it. He seemed pleased that I asked. When I asked I said I wasn't sure why the idea of him praying for me appeals to me so much. Do I just feel I need all the help I can get? Or am I trying to feel closer to T, like getting a virtual hug? Am I trying to get him to like me more? The thought of him praying to God on my behalf makes me feel very emotional. In the past I have had issues being chameleon like in relationships, and losing myself somewhat. Is this a trait common for people with c-PTSD, or insecure attachments? Anyway, I'm really confused and want to talk more about this with him but I also want to just continue with it as is, knowing he talks to God on my behalf. It makes me feel loved. Thoughts?

[atisketatasket]

I've told close friends who won't be offended - including agnostics and atheists - that I've prayed for them during rough times. They always seem touched, however much they question religion.

What makes it touching is that you know he believes - even if you don't - and that this is a sign you have some importance to him. I don't think it's necessarily chameleonness. It's not like you're learning about football so you have something to discuss with him.

[awkwardlyyours]

I haven't specifically asked someone to pray for me but in similar such instances -- when I've asked for something that's important to someone else but which I know little about -- it's usually been a way for me to make concrete whatever emotion feels too overwhelming to verbalize in that relationship.

As in, somehow to know / feel that there is something tangible by way of which I'm imprinted in the other person's memory / consciousness (for however short a while) has been comforting and given me a sense of security and safety.

And yeah, that would make me emotional because to me it's been a means of solidifying and holding on to a safe attachment given that my attachments in general have been tenuous, fleeting, scattered, inconsistent, unsafe etc.

[runlola72]

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I've told close friends who won't be offended - including agnostics and atheists - that I've prayed for them during rough times. They always seem touched, however much they question religion.

What makes it touching is that you know he believes - even if you don't - and that this is a sign you have some importance to him. I don't think it's necessarily chameleonness. It's not like you're learning about football so you have something to discuss with him.

Thanks for your response... Hoping it's not the chameleon in me. And yeah, not much in this world could make me learn about football, so it's good he's not a jock

[runlola72]

Originally Posted by awkwardlyyours

I haven't specifically asked someone to pray for me but in similar such instances -- when I've asked for something that's important to someone else but which I know little about -- it's usually been a way for me to make concrete whatever emotion feels too overwhelming to verbalize in that relationship.

As in, somehow to know / feel that there is something tangible by way of which I'm imprinted in the other person's memory / consciousness (for however short a while) has been comforting and given me a sense of security and safety.

And yeah, that would make me emotional because to me it's been a means of solidifying and holding on to a safe attachment given that my attachments in general have been tenuous, fleeting, scattered, inconsistent, unsafe etc.

Yes it does feel more of a safe attachment now. I'm really moved by his gesture