What could you learn about your therapist that would make you think less of them?

LonesomeTonight · Sep 23, 2016, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WrkNPrgress

If she supported Donald Trump.

But that idea is so ludicrous it's unimaginable.

Same here, but it's already come up with both T and marriage counselor, and they very much do not support him. They're both quite liberal politically, though I feel like I could live with them being Republican--so long as they didn't support Trump!

Myrto · Sep 23, 2016, 12:49 PM

Like I mentioned in SarahSweden's thread, if my therapist had bullied people in her youth, I just couldn't forgive her and would quit. There are no excuses for bullying, I don't care how old you were or why you did it, it's unforgivable. Also if I found out that my therapist was homophobic.

Sep 23, 2016, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monalisasmile

This is a good thread, thank you Atisketasket. I know a therapist whose client leaves his socks in the room after every session. I used to use the room after her and after finding socks a few times I suspected that she had a foot fetish but she denied it, the jury is still out on this one.
I learnt that my t is kind to all of her friends but not so kind to her clients and supervisee's.
I spoke to another therapist this week and my t is her supervisor and she is terminating t because she feels they are not working well together so I learnt my t is behaving like this with everyone in a professional context. I learnt that I take her behaviour personally.

I wish you would leave this therapist. She sounds awful.

precaryous · Sep 23, 2016, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

What piece of personal information about your therapist would make you think less of them professionally?

Another thread made me wonder this. Never mind how you got the information - you suddenly know a piece of personal information about your therapist that affects your opinion of them as a professional. What would that information be? Some kind of crime, some kind of personal foible, something against your own individual moral code, etc.?

For some reason I'm thinking "toe fetish" but that might be the insomnia talking.

Pretty sure this qualifies- searching name of a previous Pdoc and finding a pic of him being led away in handcuffs accused (and convicted) of several things...

nottrustin · Sep 23, 2016, 08:15 PM

The only thing that I can think of is I found out she lied to me. I know so much about her that unless she has lied about things I have an idea of basic belief system. Most is either in alignment to what I believe or we at least respect about each other. We have worked hard to build trust in our relationship because I have a hard time trusting people. To find out I couldn't trust her either would be then end of our professional relationship to the point I could no longer work with her.

MobiusPsyche · Sep 23, 2016, 08:53 PM

If she was an anti-vaxxer.

atisketatasket · Sep 23, 2016, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MobiusPsyche

If she was an anti-vaxxer.

I would be right with you on that one.

1stepatatime · Sep 23, 2016, 10:57 PM

To find out that she wasn't sincere in all that she says to me, that would be a deal breaker. That's my trust issue stuff creeping up rearing its ugly head im sure. Her political views, well I know she doesn't care for Donald Trump.. (can't say that I blame her) However if she were constantly advocating for Hillary that would turn me off as well.

SvanThor · Sep 23, 2016, 11:02 PM

If she was a third-wave feminist (in which case she probably would not see me).

yagr · Sep 24, 2016, 02:58 PM

Despite having an extraordinary imagination, I can't think of anything.

She's helped me where no one else was able to. I owe her a debt for that and I start by accepting her as she is - imperfect like the rest of us.

nottrustin · Sep 24, 2016, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I do think less of her because her morality is different from mine. Since most of society believes like she does, not like I do, I have to accept it. I am old-fashioned so it bothers me that T had no objections to her daughters living with their boyfriends, and she herself may be doing that. I believe in marriage first.

I also thought less of her because she got divorced. Not because divorce is wrong, but because I used to think professional Ts would know how to stay in a marriage. I've learned otherwise, and looking back, most of my former T's were divorced.

Rainbow, I struggle with this as well in general. I have a lot of the same beliefs you mention here. All the examples you mention describes my T. Since I am in the minority if it is difficult. I have learned that while I don't agree with their lifestyles, I can accept the person and our differences. But yeah it is hard.

stopdog · Sep 25, 2016, 04:57 PM

Some reasons those guys give for not disclosing more:
https://psychotherapynetworker.org/b...30am_throttled

Sep 25, 2016, 05:17 PM

I think if I learned that his professional background was made up or he intentionally mistreated clients in harmful ways, I would think less of him. I don't really care what he does in his personal life as long as I have nothing to do with it.

stopdog · Sep 25, 2016, 06:03 PM

The reason I found the article interesting was that the author was counseling couples while having domestic violence at her.

Myrto · Sep 26, 2016, 10:56 AM

I've just thought of something because Marion Cotillard is in the news (regarding the Brangelina divorce) and she's a known 9/11 truther. If I found out my therapist was into conspiracy theories (moon landing, anti-vax, pyramids, 9/11) I wouldn't be able to stay with her because conspiracy thories are so unbelievably dumb and infuriating.

junkDNA · Sep 26, 2016, 11:01 AM

if i found out he has abused someone

Sep 26, 2016, 11:28 AM

That was an interesting article Stopdog! I think if I saw my t in a supermarket scolding her child it would change the whole relationship!

Argonautomobile · Sep 26, 2016, 02:34 PM

I'd have a hard time continuing to see him if I learned he liked to trophy hunt or enjoyed the writings of Laura Schlessinger.

atisketatasket · Sep 26, 2016, 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

I'd have a hard time continuing to see him if I learned he liked to trophy hunt or enjoyed the writings of Laura Schlessinger.

What if he favored catch-and-release? You know, so the fish he releases can or can't be eaten by beavers later?

Argonautomobile · Sep 26, 2016, 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

What if he favored catch-and-release? You know, so the fish he releases can or can't be eaten by beavers later?

Hahahaha! I should harass him about that.

objectclient · Sep 27, 2016, 08:04 AM

1. History of abuse or betrayal of clients (e.g. embarking on sexual relationships, dual relationships, emotional blackmail/manipulation, massive betrayal of trust and confidentiality such as discussing clients down the hair salon etc)

2. History of involvement with criminal/immoral history whether convicted or not (e.g. murder, sexual assault, theft, fraud, GBH)

3. Having affairs, sexual deviance etc.

4. Shoots animals, fox hunts, supports Trump etc.

Sep 27, 2016, 10:35 AM

If I find out she's a fundamentalist, evangelical Christian - the kind that loves James Dobson, Michael and Debi Pearl etc

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What could you learn about your therapist that would make you think less of them?

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