[dreamrunner]

For those that have been in therapy or perhaps even give therapy this question is for you.
There has been a few times during therapy that it seem a single word gets my T's attention.For instance my T asked me, to ask my mom, to describe what kind of young girl I was growing up.During this convo I had with mom she said she felt she"sheltered"me as much as she could .When I repeated this convo to T he asked if "sheltered" was the word she used....I said yes and then he moved on.
Does the word"sheltered"mean more than just that?
I noticed hes done this with other words too....
Whats up with that? Anyone got an idea?

[WinterRose]

I'd ask T those questions - his responses might be really interesting.

Words mean different things to different people and for each person there are different associations and emotional content. I would think your T would be asking you about your reaction to the words. Wonder why he doesn't...

[majella]

From my understanding of that conversation you had with your t, I guess if I were in the t's position, I would have been asking if 'sheltered' was the word that your Mum actually used too, because it does seem like an odd word to use given the context of the conversation and question you asked your Mum.

I can imagine the word protected being used by a Mum .... but sheltered seems to say alot about your Mum's view of the world that you grew up in ... ie - that the world was a big bad place, and that her role as a Mum was to prevent you from seeing and being exposed to this badness.

It is kinda an unusual word to use if I understand the context of the conversation you had with your Mum ... and it would kinda get me wondering exactly what was going on in your childhood and in your Mum's perspective of things, that was so awful that a child would need sheltering from.

That's just my perspective on it, but then again, I dont visit this website much, so I dont know anything about you or your situation at all.

[dreamrunner]

majella
I think you hit the nail on the head.There was lots at home to shelter me from.....things were bad for a very long time.Too bad you cant shelter everything frm a child.
thanks

[Christina86]

Hey dreamrunner - I remember reading this thread, but didn't respond before!

Just wanted to let you know that my therapist does the same thing a lot of the time... asking about a word, then he moves on. Then some of the time he asks about my emotional reaction to a word.

I guess it's just a matter of whether he thinks the word is important. It would probably be more important to you if he asked for your emotional reaction to any specific word.

Is there any sort of connection to some of the other words he asks about? Do they share a commonality?

[dreamrunner]

Canders and WinterRose,
Thanks for the advise,Im gonna ask him why next time He does this.

There are certain words that the "therapy" ear is just trained to pick up on. They are words in which:

a: the therapist had a pretty good idea of what the underlying meaning is, but wants to the patient to be able to reach that insight his/herself.

b. the therapist really has no idea what the word refers to and needs more information. EX: when doing group therapy today, one of my patients said, "I'm afraid to go back home because that's where I flipped out." Immediately, I picked up on that term. I ask him, "Flipped out?" I need more information. Very often, patients will use quite extreme terms and the therapist is trained to pick up on these cues to get more information.

I don't mean to make it sound like a special list of words or anything. It's just that as you do therapy, there are just those cue words that you know you should ask about. It's funny, too, because in my own therapy... I will use a word, then realize it, and then literally be able to countdown... 3...2...1.. to when my T is going to repeat the word in a question form because I know he has picked it up as a "cue" word.

[dreamrunner]

Thanks Pink ! I figured you would have a pretty good idea of what it was.

[MsLittleSister]

I think therapists are trained to pick up certain words, depending on their orientation. There is an area of psychology: Lanconian, that looks very much at word choices and underlying signifiers. So much of how we talk comes from our families of origin and it can tell a therapist a great deal about your background. I know we talk alot about nonverbal communication, but I think verbal slips and blurted thoughts really do mean something.

[MissCharlotte]

He's probably an analyst ... they read into everything. My T is an analyst, It used to bug me sometimes but now I don't care. he can analyze away, it's his job.