At a Loss for Words

I'm not sure where to put this. I guess this is the closest next best place. I see a dietician for an eating disorder. I have seen her off and on for 3 years. The other day I bought an x-acto knife so that I'd have something sharp when I felt the need to self-harm. I knew it wasn't a good idea, but the urge out weighed my wise mind at the time. I told my friend and the people at the A.N.A.D. group I attend, and they incouraged me to give it to my therapist. I went to my dietician appointment the next day and what I did came up in conversation with my dietician. She said I could give it to her after our session, which I was hesitant about. After session, she followed me to my car and I gave it to her. She then gave me a hug and said she loved me and to have a good holiday. I did not know what to do or say about her saying she loved me. Is that something that happens? Has anyone else had their therapist or dietician say they loved you? I never heard those words when I was growing up, so I get really uncomfortable. I want to say it back to people when they say it to me, but it's like I just freeze. I don't feel like those are words that I'm able to say.

I think therapist should never say that to keep good boundary, but dietitians are not mental health professionals. I would be super confused if doctor, dietitian, or anyone who I only have professional relationship hug me, though.

She may be "I love you all" type person. I also freeze whenever someone gives me hug and say they love me, but I know several people who hugs nearly everyone and use the phrase "I love you" like "hi." I don't know what she really meant, but hope it makes you somehow less confusing.

She's never said that to me before, and that was the first time she had ever hugged me either. We text each other a lot sometimes, but it's always about food stuff. Suicide has also come up in convo lately b.c. I had been suicidal 8 months ago and wasn't honest about it. I don't know if she's just trying to let me know someone does care about me?

My long term therapist said he loved me and it was healing, not inappropriate the way he approached it. Other people are bound to care about you if they are working with you on these deep issues.

my t and i say i love you and hug quite often.
and when i had a dietician back in my anorexia days, she and i used to say it also and she would hug me.
always means so much to me.

It's not something I never hear from anyone, so it took me off guard. I told my previous T one time that I felt like everyone hated me and that I didn't matter to people. She told me that I was very easy to care about. My dietician has also said that I'm a great client. I just thought that dieticians and therapists and doctors weren't allowed to care about or love their clients.

My T Dosent say it. I don't expect get too. I think if a person has positive genuine regard for a client, that comes through over a time. I think saying goes that, detracted from the gesture you were making which needed therapeutic recognition. The handing over of the knife.

They're definitely allowed to care. And I'm sure some of them love their clients, but might feel uncomfortable saying the word for various reasons (personal or professional).

My T has indirectly said she loves me--a few months ago, I said I loved her, then added that I knew she couldn't really say it back, that the therapeutic relationship was kind of weird like that. She agreed that it was a unique relationship, adding, "Not that I don't love you, too." (I've been seeing her almost 5 years, and the last time I said I loved her, she just said "That's very sweet," which bothered me.)

My marriage counselor hasn't said the L word (though he's said it was OK when I said I loved him and asked if that was OK and has been accepting of other admissions of love/attachment.) But he's told me before that "I genuinely care about you." I also had said to him at one point that he just cared about me because I paid him and it was his job. And he said, "You can pay me to do my job, but you can't pay me to care" (meaning he cared by choice).

With the T I saw for over 5 years, we started saying "I love you" about 3 or 4 years into therapy. Now, she isn't my T anymore but we have coffee once in awhile and say "I love you" every time. For me, it feels sweet and comforting and lets me know that someone cares.

I'm sorry you're feeling confused. I'd feel confused, too.

No, that's not true. I'd probably punch my T in the nose. But then I'm hardly the paragon of healthy interpersonal relations.

Sounds like a great thing to process in therapy. Hope you feel better, soon.

My T and I say it all the time. My T is very careful about using it around self harm/suicide issues as my mother basically wanted me to kill myself so i have very complicated issues around love and self harm.
But we say it all the time.

No, he won't say it because of my past.

He says I care.about you very much