[Electric76]

In my previous experiences of therapy my therapists terminated with me once I was doing better and ran out of things to talk about. Now I'm in more of a long-term depth therapy orientation. Been seeing this T over a year and still have a lot of work to do. However money is about to get tight and I suddenly realized I want to end our work asap before I potentially get too attached while running out of savings. I want to end on good terms, I know this will surprise her. How many sessions should I have after telling her Im leaving? I want closure but don't want to drag it out either. What have been your experiences of terminating with therapists?

[Sarmas]

I'm not sure if there are a number of closures. I think it's based on what you feel is right and how quickly you want to end it. Closure can be done in one session but if you still want to process or address issues then you're looking at more sessions ahead of you. Perhaps before you even think of terminating you can speak to her about your financial issue and see if you can work out somethings with her. Some Ts have a sliding scale. I'm guessing it's best to be open woth her about your situation than to terminate being that you still have things to process.

[ThunderGoddess]

I'm sorry you are facing this struggle, I hope you are able to keep seeing her somehow if you really vibe well! Ask if she can do a sliding scale fee because you are running low on funds, she may be able to help

In my experience, I was able to choose when I wanted to terminate with my psychotherapist.

In a pre set agreement and commitment that I had through a state ran hospital the last session was the day I terminate. Don't think they gave a crap and I didn't fit well there anyway.

You don't necessarily need to have a so-called "termination process" or even a specific "termination session" with therapists. I never had these. If you like, simply just don't go back from one week to the next. It is not unethical or inappropriate or anything. Based on what you describe in the OP (wanting some closure but financial reason not to drag it), maybe one last session?

I wish I knew the answer. I've not been able to do it yet after 5+ years even though I've tried more than once. I'd told t last month that I wanted to take a break this month because we have a month of mandatory overtime at work, and I couldn't even be assertive enough to not be talked into making an appt for this weekend. Gah.

I never had real "termination" sessions, and honestly I think it was better that way for me.

With my first two, we knew the last session was coming due to circumstances that we knew in advance. We pretty much just carried on as normal with a bit of discussion about whether I was going to continue on in therapy with someone else or not and how to go about finding help if needed (I chose to leave that up in the air at the time). Our last session I think I gave them a card and a note of thanks, we said our goodbyes and that was it. For me, that was better than spending weeks on drawing out the goodbye.

With my most recent, we actually never really terminated. I simply stopped going because I didn't see the need to go anymore. He never inquired as to why I stopped coming; he knew I was ready. I could go back to see him again if needed; we left it open. I actually did go back a couple of times, but found I only thought I needed his help; I was really very okay managing on my own. It was rather revealing to discover that I had gained that independence from therapy.

[ABC1357]

Did you talk about your financial situation with your t? I know many of them offer sliding scale. If you want ton continue working on, I think it's worth talking it before you terminate it.

[luvnola]

It's up to you how you do it. I've never had termination sessions or closure session because I don't need them. The times I've left, I've just told the t that this will be our last session. Other ts who I didn't see very long, I just never went back. Current t I've been with 8 years and I just stopped going for a year, then went back for a session and now see her only when I need to, like maybe once every couple of months. So never terminated with her, but just see her infrequently.

[Lauliza]

As a client there is no protocol for terminating. You can simply never return if that works best. You can tell your T your financial dilemma and see if there is a way they can help. If they can't help, then you can tell them you can't afford therapy and won't be able to continue. That's not uncommon and most Ts will welcome you back if the situation changes. You don't need closure seasons, especially if you can't afford it.

[Electric76]

Thank you for everyones reply. She already gives me a discounted rate (2/3 of full rate) I can't possibly ask for less. Maybe if she offers it but even still! I know theres more than money making me terminate at this time and seems like an interesting conversation

[SuzyQ12]

Originally Posted by Xynesthesia

You don't necessarily need to have a so-called "termination process" or even a specific "termination session" with therapists. I never had these. If you like, simply just don't go back from one week to the next. It is not unethical or inappropriate or anything. Based on what you describe in the OP (wanting some closure but financial reason not to drag it), maybe one last session?

I tried that one, and was called up by my T, and ended up agreeing that I was in the wrong and needed to go back to him. That speaks volumes about me and my desire to please, I guess. But the point I wanted to make is, it's not always so easy to just stop seeing your T.

Originally Posted by SuzyQ12

I tried that one, and was called up by my T, and ended up agreeing that I was in the wrong and needed to go back to him. That speaks volumes about me and my desire to please, I guess. But the point I wanted to make is, it's not always so easy to just stop seeing your T.

It's not so easy especially if we are that way(people pleaser) inclined or if there is an attachment.
Do you find your t helpful?
I really don't think it is our ts decision on whether we leave or decide to stay. Maybe your t made some valid points about why he thinks that you should stay but I wonder why you didn't trust your own instinct and judgement here. Perhaps it is people pleasing or not trusting your own opinions or a combination of both.

[MariaLucy]

I think if the T has been helpful, it is common decency to inform them, either by phone or letter or a last session with a card if you are being really polite. They are human too and it is hard on them if we just walk away. I have never just walked away. It didn't seem polite. I have always explained my reasons and then given a small gift and a card. Just seems like the decent thing to do.