[Inner_Firefly]

For my 10th therapy anniversary, I made a booklet for T.

Each page has a photo and a sentence about how she helped me, how much she means to me, etc.

She didn't smile much, just looked through it, said "it's lovely", then changed the subject back to my life problems.

Was my booklet too sentimental?

Or was she trained to react like this, because of "boundaries"?

Or was she just eager to help me with my problems?

I felt embarrassed, like I was "naked" emotionally and she was covered in armour? I couldn't tell what she was thinking.

[growlycat]

Maybe it really touched her but she didn’t want to get emotional in front of you?

[Inner_Firefly]

Originally Posted by growlycat

Maybe it really touched her but she didn’t want to get emotional in front of you?

Oh, never thought of it that way! Thank you so much Growlycat, you're good at thinking outside the box. How nice to have your perspective. I assumed I was "too gushy" and made her feel yucky. I'm glad to hear your idea.

[growlycat]

My current t has said that the more emotional a situation is the more likely a t will seem more serious. He has admitted to holding it together until a patient leaves. You can always ask your t.

[Ididitmyway]

I understand the feeling of embarrassment. I've been in those types of situations in therapy when you feel that your expressions of appreciation should've been received with a reciprocal appreciation by a therapist. When it doesn't happen you feel humiliated. It could be quite traumatic actually, even though technically the therapist didn't do anything wrong.

You didn't do anything wrong either. I do think though that your therapist could've had a warmer reception of your gift and could've expressed appreciation by saying that she was touched by it or something like that.

[Wonderfalls]

I think she might have been embarrassed by it, as we often are by high praise. After 10 years I don't think it was over the top and I think she really will appreciate as she looks it over again later.

[Inner_Firefly]

Originally Posted by Wonderfalls

I think she might have been embarrassed by it, as we often are by high praise. After 10 years I don't think it was over the top and I think she really will appreciate as she looks it over again later.

Wonderfalls, thank you so much your comment means a lot to me. I'm glad you pointed out that everyone responds to praise differently. Yes, you're right, maybe she appreciates it but was just caught off guard. Thank you again!

Originally Posted by Ididitmyway

I understand the feeling of embarrassment. I've been in those types of situations in therapy when you feel that your expressions of appreciation should've been received with a reciprocal appreciation by a therapist. When it doesn't happen you feel humiliated. It could be quite traumatic actually, even though technically the therapist didn't do anything wrong.

You didn't do anything wrong either. I do think though that your therapist could've had a warmer reception of your gift and could've expressed appreciation by saying that she was touched by it or something like that.

Thank you for understanding, I really appreciate your comment. Just hearing your thoughts makes me feel less alone!

Originally Posted by growlycat

My current t has said that the more emotional a situation is the more likely a t will seem more serious. He has admitted to holding it together until a patient leaves. You can always ask your t.

How interesting, thank you for sharing! I wonder if this has to do with boundaries, blank slate, or something... I'm afraid to ask T for fear of seeming needy of approval.