[Blue Fish]

I've been seeing my new counselor for almost 2 months; I think he's great. I'm in counselling for the death of my daughter. I've shared a lot with him and even talked a bit about my childhood but skipped right over some trauma that happened a few years ago. Last session we were talking about my depression that has been fairly constant since the trauma a few years ago. He asked me when my depression started so I said a few years ago, so he asked if there was something that triggered it so I said yes. He asked me if it was because of something that I had already talked about or mentioned to him so I said no. He then said he felt a bit manipulated by me because there's obviously something significant that happened in my life that is probably still affecting me and complicating my grief for my daughter. I told him that I was there to talk about my daughter and not the other stuff so I never brought it up. He said it's all related and things from my past are going to keep affecting my life until I deal with them. He said maybe if I'm ready I could share some of what happened at some point with him.
It wasn't my intention hide my trauma from him but I was just so focused on my daughter. I've been in trauma counselling before so I feel like it's kind of pointless to talk about my trauma again. So I don't know if I should try and talk about it again or if I should just tell him to leave it alone. I also don't know how long I get to see him for so I don't want to bring it up and then have my sessions run out.
The word manipulated keeps running around my head and makes me feel kind of bad.

[kecanoe]

Well, it certainly is up to you to decide what you do and don't want to share with t. Although it does make sense that if you have been depressed since the trauma, that your trauma/depression are going to affect your grief.

Is there a way to find out how many sessions of therapy you can have? Would talking about the trauma perhaps make it so you get more sessions? Does your t have experience helping people to recover from trauma?

[SummerTime12]

From what you've written it doesn't sound like you manipulated him.. I wouldn't appreciated my T using that word either, I'm sorry :/ In fact, you were quite honest and straightforward by telling him the truth when he asked you about what triggered your depression. It really is up to you what you want to process with him. He should respect that. If you feel like the trauma is holding back your progress, it might be a good idea to at least touch on it. If not, don't feel like you have to talk about it just because your T wants you to. Do what is best for you

[magicalprince]

That almost sounds like gaslighting from your T. I would tell him it makes you uncomfortable at the least. He shouldn't be pressuring you to talk about something until you feel ready.