[Christina86]

I had a psychiatrist appointment this morning.

It went really well. I like him, he's someone I genuinely can get along with and seems to understand me. He's also funny and sarcastic, so it's a good combo since I'm the same way. I saw him twice in April when I was in a group he ran (which I'm restarting again next week). He wanted to see everyone, so I went.

I went back this time on the urging of some people here, some of my IRL friends and my T all agreed I should go talk to him.

And I did.

We had a good conversation, discussed how my mood and everything was and how my summer was. Basically I said my life was miserable.

He says he sees me as someone in a bad situation because of my disability. Something not many people would consider, but sometimes being 'disabled' can be pretty bloody depressing.

So he won bonus points for even saying that. Hehe.

He seems to get me too much. I'm also far too honest around him (yes, it can be a detriment when I don't like people knowing me too well, attachment issues).

But what can I say... nice guy.

He told me that it has to be pretty bad for me to seek help, since I'm not the kind to ask for help unless I'm desperate. I am, I just never thought of it like that.

He asked me when I would consider meds, when I had suicidal thoughts, when I was back to SIng again, when I flunked a course, when I was so miserable that I couldn't get out of bed... when would I accept help?

I said I wouldn't until it got to that point.

Hence the problem, because then it's almost too late.

... started talking about meds.

So Christina is now on meds. Joy of joys.

He said it was a low dosage, and a drug that he thought would work the best with the least amount of interaction with another drug I'm on (for the disability).

I told him I didn't know anything about psychopharmacology (except what they teach in your undergrad degree in psych) so I'd let him make the decisions, I'd try it out and if I didn't like it... would deal with that when the time comes.

So I go to get the prescription filled, took my first pill (it's a once a day thing) and now I'm freaking out.

So I get to go to T in just over a week and say I'm on meds now.

Unless it's a good idea that T knows now, rather than later.

Or makes me see this rationally. Meds aren't bad, they do work for people...

But I'm so conflicted right now.

But at least the psychiatrist is a nice guy who'll try to help me out.

(If anyone knows anything about meds, I'll make a post after this one about the med I'm on in the Drug forum asking for people's opinions and the like since this is the first time I've ever done this)

[Soidhonia]

Hopefully the meds will help you become more stable. For me they were a life saver. I hope the best for you in the future. Take care. Soidhonia

[Perna]

I'm glad you're giving things a try, being proactive, and seem to have a good relationship with the pdoc.

[Christina86]

((((((((((Soidhonia)))))))))))))

(((((((((((Perna)))))))))))))))

Thanks both of you.