My Therapy Session - Part 4

It makes total sense that it's a trigger, as we are in our most vulnerable place when in a crisis. So why not change the availability of the trigger itself?

Next time you're in a crisis, don't email your T. Call and ask for an emergency appointment. Rely on your husband for support until you can get in and see your T. Most importantly, discuss the plan with your T. Distractions and self soothing can be used until you can get in to see her. Or otherwise set up a crisis plan that doesn't involve her except for scheduling.

I think it is difficult to get what you need in the way you are trying to get it. It's like setting yourself and your T up for failure.

Either that, or don't have another crisis

This is just a thought & please dismiss it if I’m not on your wave length. It sounds to me like you may have outgrown your t. If you’ve been with her for 15 years, maybe a new & different perspective might be exactly what you need. Maybe a break from current t for say 6 months, see a new & different t & then re-evaluate. A new approach may be just what you need to help your direction.

I was thinking this, too. I'd been seeing T1 for 6 years and started feeling like I'd gotten as far as I could with her (plus we've had some conflicts). I started with a new T about 6 weeks ago, and he's been really helpful. First session was kinda scary, and the first time I really opened up to him and cried in front of him was *really* scary. But getting a different perspective and seeing someone with a different personal style of doing therapy has been really helpful.

I was technically just trying T2 as a sort of consultant, thinking it would likely be short-term, then I'd go back to T1. But I think I'm going to stick with him. You could just try someone out on a short-term, just for even 2 months, see how it feels to get a different perspective, different personality. You may have to try out a couple (I lucked out with this one, though I also researched lots of T's on Psychology Today before calling him and one other one, so it's not like I picked him at random.) Worth a shot, I think...