Couch 155: The International Operator

My boss just asked: Hey capt, how are you doing? Everything is fine?
Capt: No
Boss: It's okay! Just stay positive! Life is good!

I know he's trying to be friendly, but I feel like crying again

Wow, your boss obviously has no clue

I'd say definitely serious enough. Please get checked out...

Can’t sleep so I am watching youtube videos of drum and pipe parades.

Edinburgh Military Tattoo?

Thanks for the explanation Luc...I have uploaded a few pictures into an album. These are pretty much the way my brain works right now. No faces, because I can't draw faces...and anyway, I think they'd detract from what I am really trying to 'say' here. I haven't yet shown R, but I intend to. I think they might be important.

https://forums.psychcentral.com/album.php?albumid=5338

Hey, Demunie, blood in urine sounds very bad. Please go see a doctor.

Capt, sorry that you had to suffer in pain.

*hugs to couchies who want one*

My year end staff appraisal is due. My boss is leaving end of this month. I'll have to disclose my regular "leave work early once every two weeks to one month for therapy" to my new boss who might not be my new appraisal boss. :/

I hope they're understanding, QM.

Thanks for sharing, Lost. I found your pictures quite affecting. I hope you will show R, sounds like there's some important stuff there for you.

QM, I hope the appraisal goes well and that the new boss is understanding.

Demunie- I think you should go to the doctor.

Lost- Nice art!

Everyone-

What a crappy night that was. Nightmares, insomnia.

And on the agenda today is dealing with a mega-drama queen. Serious scenery-chewing. Beavers create less sawdust.

My son decided to tell me the other night that he got a tattoo.... he showed me, it's a little pineapple near his ankle. As his mother, I'm glad it's someplace he can cover it up easily, since one of his goals is to get hired on at a big local company where I am pretty certain tattoos are verboten. I'm cool with it overall I suppose. I mean, i want to get one, I just haven't decided what or where yet so... and besides he'll be 19 in like 2 weeks or so. I can't really tell him what to do anymore.

I'm just glad he's still talking to me and sharing things about his life with me as much as I messed up as a mother when he was young... seriously I look at him now and wonder how on earth he came out so good as messed up as I was when he was little....

morning couchies and hugs /headnods around.

Called 3 doctors

one is on vacation
other two don't take on new clients

yeah. no. no. no.

Maybe you can try an urgent care clinic? Probably not as good as going to a doctor but maybe they can help until the one gets back from vacation.

I forget where you live, but are there walk-in clinics there? We call them urgent care centers here. Kind of a step between a doctor's office and an ER. Could be an option.

Switzerland...

There are but I feel far from stable enough to sit around in a stupid waiting room for the next 4 hours. Maybe it will resolve itself.

Maybe call and see how long the wait is? Could be something like a urinary tract infection, where they could just do a quick urine test then give you antibiotics.

Hugs Demunie

Amongst others.

This latest change to Tapatalk is weird...

I was talking last night to the concertmaster of the orchestra that fired me for missing a rehearsal. I like him, he is very supportive of me when there's absolutely no obligation for him to be so, at all. He is the one who rehearsed my apology letter and got me back to play a concert with them in September after I'd been cut from the roster.

Apparently he was talking to the conductor about me last week, trying to get me considered again for a tenured position. The conductor said he doesn't want me, because I was "unengaged" at that second-chance September concert.

That was the week I had to call a suicide hotline and M had to spend half an hour with me on the phone during break to talk me out of my plans.

I was pretty impressed I made it through alive. But I was not being an engaged section player.

Ok. You know what, **** this.

Meanwhile, there are people who show up late and drunk to every rehearsal, people who get lost mid-piece and can't match the section to save their lives. But I came in highly recommended and caught this jerk's attention, and then I dared to be "unengaged."

I'll throw in a minor kvetch in addition: I was really looking forward to the shakshouka I packed for dinner but the smell of the egg is KILLING me.

....I don't get a break and I feel bad for the student who always gets me eating dinner. At first I thought I might try to alternate whose lesson it was, but then I thought maybe if this kid's experience is always me teaching and eating, he won't know the difference? Is there a difference? Eh.

That sounds like such a load of bollocks, Anais... I don't see how they can ask more of you than showing up and playing. Eurgh.

The smell of egg tends to bother me too, even though I like eating them. I doubt the kid minds that you're eating, but it sucks that you don't get a proper break.

And agreed that the whole "engaged" thing sounds ridiculous. Pretty sure I don't generally look too engaged when I'm doing work...(Which...also maybe is part of why I want to change careers...)