Confront T or not

So I feel stuck. My kids T has great potential in being a great therapist. I don’t think she takes my kids seriously. When I approach her about certain things she gets defensive. I feel that she’s not addressing their needs. She sees them now every two weeks because she’s bumped them out of her schedule because now she has so many more clients that she has taken on. My youngest video taped her on his phone and was showing me how she was texting during his session. I can’t really switch therapists because my ex husband is really good at playing the role that he’s a victim and I’m this crazy person. This therapist tolerates me. I’m afraid that a different therapist would believe him. I also feel that she has more dialogue with him based on the info that my son comes out of session. with. I’m not sure if I should approach her about the video or not. I’m thinking somehow she would get defensive and upset with me. She might at that point terminate with the boys just because. My T tends to side with her being that my T and their T are best friends. This is not a good equation. It was too much for me to handle this week with the video and everything going on. I cancelled with my T indefinitely.

A good therapist won't take sides between you and your ex-husband. A good therapist will do more than just tolerate the parent. A good therapist will put the needs of your kids first -- not her own. This t doesn't seem like a good t, nor has she been for quite some time. Her disrespect seems harmful to the kids and you. You can't get unstuck unless things change. You've been trying for change for a while now. I'd confront her. She was wrong to be texting during your kids therapy time (heck, your kid even knows it was wrong). I wouldn't care if she got upset or defensive when being called out for not doing her job.

Good for you for cancelling with your t indefinitely (assuming it was the same one you were having trouble with a while ago)!!

Why do you say “My kids T has great potential in being a great therapist”? Everything you say after that suggests the opposite.

A therapist should know not to take sides or text in session. I read nothing redeeming about her in your post.

You’re so right. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt but she really doesn’t deserve it. My son took a video of her for some time and then pictures and she didn’t even bat an eye.

She’s been worse since she can back from her maternity leave. Her scheduling is everywhere. I was shocked when I saw the video. It’s something else for him to tell me but when I actually saw it and she didn’t even pick up her head once. She was so focused on her phone in the video. I was almost going to show it to my T but then I knew that I would gain nothing from it. They support each other.

Yes you’re right it’s the same T. We were doing a little better and then a couple of things she has going on outside of session I really don’t believe in. She’s in the media at times protesting. It’s complicated. Then my T sides with her and tells me that she’s not siding with her. When I complain then she tells me that I’m making the whole case about me and that it’s not about me but them. It’s all a psychological game.