[rep97]

I am currently looking online and I chose her because she was specializing in trauma and ptsd but I also chose her because of her age and face lol. She is young and I believe she could hold up against me. But she doesn't have BPD on her profile and that is a big let down. I emailed her and told her that trauma is fine but she doesn't have bpd on her profile and if she will work with me.

Should I look for other therapists who specialize in both bpd and trauma or work with her if she says yes? Also do you look at the face and age or specialization or both?

If you can, see more than one before you make a decision. I think specialisms can be helpful but I wouldn't discount someone who doesn't list BPD, particularly if they list trauma. My advice would be to go along and ask her whether she has any experience working with people with BPD. You get much better sense of a person when you meet them face to face.

lucky dip... always so much fun to see what you get when you are not paying..

[rep97]

Originally Posted by Coming up tails

lucky dip... always so much fun to see what you get when you are not paying..

This is a private therapist. I'm gonna be paying her actually.

[toomanycats]

So, my therapist has the crappiest online profile ever ...it doesn't at all outline everything he does or covers. I never would've picked him via PsychologyToday because his profile doesn't match anything I was looking for.

I have found most of my Ts the way you are doing - via PsychologyToday profiles. However, with this one, I knew that I needed something specific: someone who would do adult attachment trauma work and allow between-session contact. So, I actually emailed around to a few practices with a fairly extensive email detailing my situation and what I knew I wanted to have (namely, the outside contact).

One practice emailed back with two names of people I'd never heard of or seen in my PsychToday searches. I then reached out to one of them, and he is now my new T. I felt far more confident choosing him, also, because I had been referred to him -- colleagues knew his name, he was known in the community. This was helpful for me after coming out of a damaging, unethical therapy relationship.

[kecanoe]

None of my Ts has been on Psychology Today. I think they have to pay to be listed there.

At this point in my treatment, I know that I want a specific technique, and I have searched on that website for Ts in my area-and the only one is the one I am seeing. But if I quit with her, I will probably go direct to someone with the technique.

In the past, I have gone with referrals.

I think it is definitely worth asking the potential T if they have experience with BPD. I have heard that some Ts like to limit the number of cases they treat for certain issues. So maybe they wouldn't advertise a specific diagnosis. I would think that a person who treats trauma would be familiar with treating BPD.

[Moment]

I think if I looked at the face and age of my therapist, I never would have picked him. But he's been great for me.

I met with another therapist who described herself as doing trauma work, and she was terrible for me, and I really did not understand how she worked with people who had experienced trauma.

I'd try to talk to three or four therapists and see which one you feel most comfortable with. If you have past therapy experiences, good or bad, ask if they will do (or not do) whatever bothered you or whatever you thought was helpful. For example, what are their policies about between appointment contact? Email? Texting? Do you like their office/support staff? Their personal style? I think if you just pick a random therapist based on proximity to your home, it's going to be a real crap shoot as to whether you get someone who is going to be good. Are you on medication and, if so, can your medication provider give some referrals? Or even your general physician?

[RaineD]

I went to a psychotherapeutic institute's website and looked up members in my geographical area. It's an institute for a type of therapy I wanted to try.

I don't consider people's appearance, but I do intentionally choose older therapists in order to avoid erotic transference. Regular transference is bad enough.

I also can't imagine seeing a therapist who is younger than me so age is definitely a factor for me.

[stopdog]

I believe in interviewing several/many of them before making the decision to hire any of them. I choose older than I am women who are straight (I am a lesbian) so as to cut down on the possibility that I will run into them in my community.

[Marsfx]

I think if I were looking for a new one, I'd def look at someone specializing in anything I wanted major help in. I realize that my therapist doesn't specialize in ADHD, so a lot of the time I feel the need to remind her.

Would prob get a male therapist if I left my current one, only thing I'd be unsure about is age.
I'd go off just my initial comfort. Also I think I'd definitely meet with a few before choosing. I think it'd give you something to measure your initial feeling of whoever you'd choose.

[rep97]

She emailed me back and said she doesn't work with BPD clients so it is not a right fit. Seems like a disappointment because I was looking forward to her as I have multiple traumas and I thought she could work with me if she made an effort to treat my bpd as well.

But I will email another T who is older and treats bpd and trauma but she is older and that is not something I like. I like younger female therapists because I connect with them better. So we will see. A disappointment nonetheless. Every time I look forward to a therapist this happens, they turn me down.

[rep97]

Btw my complex ptsd and bpd are not diagnosed I am going by what I have seen online and the symptoms etc and it seems I fit the criteria mostly.