[Crook32]

My T is very big on ethics and boundaries. Which has always been fine but lately out of the blue it feels like she is making them tighter. It makes me feel like I have done something wrong. At our last session she informed me that she was going out of the country and wouldn’t have access to email but the whole time she is saying it I felt like I was being scolded. Also she would normally say if a trip was for work or vacation and she remained tight lipped.

So when I got home that night I emailed her and said we needed to talk. I never heard back from her. That is another new thing in the last two weeks of her not emailing back. I mean they are only one or two sentences I am not expecting a novel.

So now I have to figure out what to say.

[Amyjay]

It seems like you want to make sure the relationship is okay? Its hard when boundaries are tightened because it feels like they are going to leave!
Can you just email her and tell her what you noticed and ask if you guys are still "okay"?

My T and I don't talk about the relationship but have a set of "markers" that let me know where we stand with each other. The markers are always there in place and they are our "barometer" so to speak. I know when T has suddenly shifted these without explanation it completely throws me off and I feel like I don't know what the heck is going on anymore. That's when it helps to talk about it and say exactly what I've noticed and how it makes me feel.