Do you ask the therapist to change things in their office for you?

you would run screaming from my T's office. Technically it isn't hers, and all of the stuff is another T's things...but it is filled with stuffed animals (in a basket) and all sorts of tchotchkes all over the place. In one of the first sessions I asked my T if she saw kids, but she doesn't! haha. I like to have stuff to look at, so it doesn't bother me, but I could see how it could drive some people crazy.

With my last T, she kept the office pretty sterile, so over 5.5 years, all i could stare at was the same effing pattern in the oriental rug. I joked at one point that I could draw it from memory.

Yeah, I like to adjust the lighting. And sometimes the angles of the chairs have been all wrong, so we need to work on that before I can begin.

Yes. There was some creepy *** medical equipment in there. Gave me the willies. He moved it.

No, I have never asked a therapist to change something for my comfort, but my last two therapist have changed things on my behalf. The first one was a clock in a sculpture and without my glasses I would see three WWII dictators. The other one had an animal calendar with many cat portraits. She knows I am not fond of cats. My next session she had a wildlife calendar of mostly exotic birds. She loves animals and I did not mind the cat calendar. I would focus on it when I was being wily but those days are gone.

Everybody here seems so meek. I told my former therapist that I couldn't stand having the radio played (softly) in the waiting room (his office manager had had the bright idea of subjecting us to that) and the next time I came it was gone and it never came back. He never needed suggestions about lights or blinds. Just a squint worked.

I don't see it as other posters are exhibiting meekness - which sounds a tad judgmental. People approach therapists in different ways. I don't change anything at a therapist's office. I would not change anything at anyone else's office. If I dislike the office that much, I change therapists. Otherwise, I deal with it. I did not have the familiarity with the therapist I hired to change anything. And I do not believe in asking therapists for favors. To me, that sort of thing leads therapists to think they have bonded with you or worse, you don't know the cost of it hanging over your head. Also, I never thought it was all that good of an idea to get comfortable at the woman's office. I understand others use and see therapists differently than I do.
So, for example, in your music in the waiting room problem - I solved my hatred of her waiting room by simply going in exactly on time or 1 minute later so that her door was open and I walked in. I dislike the idea of a therapist summoning me.

I never asked my T to change anything but for a while now she has been turning her clock around so I don't see it during the session! I used to look at it too much because I didn't like how fast the sessions went by.

I've asked him to close the blinds a few times, but that's about it.

This is interesting. I guess I have a slightly different view of the space and ownership. I generally make whatever minor adjustments I need to be comfortable: shifting a pillow, moving a coaster or kleenex box. I do have an issue with fluorescent lighting--it makes me feel ill. Apparently, some people can see the flicker and others can't. Those who can often have a sensitivity to headaches, eye strain, fatigue, and anxiety. So I explained this to the T, and she was fine with my request to turn off the overhead light. She has no other lighting in the room, but it does have 2 large windows with blinds that I open slightly. I would not go as far as bringing her a lamp--though I wonder why she doesn't bring one in.

I usually make the adjustment while asking her if she doesn't mind? Now when I arrive, the overhead light is usually off already. On a few dark winter days I have mentioned with a laugh that perhaps I should bring a flashlight?

But I don't see the consultation room as "her office." I see it as a shared space. There is a door in her waiting room that is marked "private" that is her office where she keeps files, etc. I would never think to trespass there. So since I see the consultation room as a shared space, I don't see minor adjustments as her doing me a favor. Nor do I see it as bonding--maybe more like a dog marking territory???

But I see examination rooms in medical offices in much the same way. Like my former gyn practice always used paper half gowns and lap drapes, and I hated them. Always felt unnecessarily exposed and cold. So I would ask the nurse for a longer gown. My practitioner would always complain about the excess--and I really didn't care! Happily my current practitioner uses not only knee length gowns, but cloth, too! When I mentioned it, she laughed and said she insisted because she hates the short paper gowns, too!

The ones I hired only had the one room and they both referred to it as their office. It would not have mattered to me if their space was partitioned off differently, but I can see how the idea works.

He doesn't have anything in the office that would need adjusting! It's just two chairs, a poster a desk and a clock.

But I think I'd ask first though.

Both my Ts had multi-room spaces, except for former T's Univ office. But even in that room, which was pretty large, his desk was in a different area than the recliner chairs, so seemed like a separate space.

No I don't but I do request that we don't meet in his actual office

If we have to meet in his office he will crack the door. I never asked him to do that but it does help me. I get triggered by being in his office alone w him feeling trapped

No. Both of my Ts had decent offices and I never had an urge to change anything even though, if they were my offices, I would decorate them differently. My last T's couch in one of his offices (he uses two at two locations in the city) was not the most comfortable - too soft for my taste. But I usually found a spot on it that felt okay and never said anything. There was also a pretty strong smell always lingering in the waiting room from some product the cleaners used, but I could not smell it in the actual T room. Too bright lighting would bother me but none of them had that. I sometimes asked the Ts about some of the objects but merely out of curiosity, not because I meant to change them.

I think if the office had too many toys and kids' stuff, especially all over the space, that would bother me. Probably because I am not used to that, don't have kids and never worked in places that had anything to do with kids. My last T had some toys neatly tucked away in a corner and that did not bother me.

One of the very few things I liked about my first T was how he had his own artwork (paintings) hanging on the walls. I did not particularly like his art but did like how he used it to make the space an expression of himself, it had a good balance as otherwise the office looked quite professional and traditional for a T office.

I once interviewed a T whose office was rather quirky and artsy - one wall had a large graffiti (one really interesting and nicely done) and the general furniture and decoration was also pretty unconventionally artistic but had nothing distasteful and cheap, everything looked high quality and harmonious. I liked that office a lot and would have loved spend an hour there weekly, but I did not like the T himself so never went back. I also liked a few other offices that had a sort of high-end business feel.

One feature that would really bother me to the point of not going back in a T office is messiness or dirt, but I have never seen any.

Regarding offering something to drink, my last T sometimes had either a small water bottle or a plastic cup filled with water upon my arrival. I grabbed the bottle once and never opened in the office but took it with me - why not? Otherwise I never touched the water unless I was genuinely thirsty.

I don't like when a T makes elaborate interpretations based on whether or not a client criticizes or asks for something in the office (or never asks), I think it can be very superficial and misleading. For example, one of mine once got into a monologue when I did not take an envelope he offered to put the insurance form in, how it was interpreted as my not needing/accepting help. In reality, I simply did not need the envelope as I had a folder in my purse and was not planning to mail the paperwork but submit online. But when he did the same later, I just took the envelope as I did not want to get into that irrelevant talk again. I guess if a client had a repeated tendency to criticize, refuse, or want to change something in the office, that can be interesting to discuss but pushing sophisticated interpretations on it and using it as a test is a stretch IMO.

I voted 'Other' bc I used to move my chair closer to T's chair, which always seemed too far away. I didn't ask - I just moved it. Now, I'm not moving my chair bc T angered me by asking why I measured closeness in inches? The physical distance between us is sometimes too great and I have trouble feeling close to T.

Two sessions ago, T's phone 'toned' six or seven times during our session. That's never happened before, but I knew T's birthday was the upcoming weekend and I figured friends and family were coming in from parts unknown. I thought I ignored the tones fairly well, but realized later that I didn't ignore the distractions as well as I'd thought. I told T yesterday how distracting it had been for me, but didn't ask for the phone to be silenced. T turned the phone off.

I guess I could have answered 'No, it's T's office', but in a small way, I asked T to turn the phone off by relating how distracting it was the week earlier.

Other. I told t a sign in her office triggered me so she offered to take it down before I come in. I was too nervous to ask but she was nice enough to offer.

It seems I'm often complaining about one thing or another. Sometimes she accommodates; other times, she shrugs because she doesn't give a flying flip. Once, I brought in a heater because it was cold and her portable heater was anemic. The other day, I had an injury and she brought her desk chair around for me. I tried it out, but didn't like it so went back to being miserable on the couch.

I have asked T1 to change things a few times. I told him that I didn't like a game box and he moved it right away. He sometimes has a space heater on near my chair, and has told me to feel free to adjust it, so I do that if I am hot/cold. I have asked for a coaster. And I have asked him to move his chair closer when it has been pushed back.

I also move pillows in any Ts office if I think I would be more comfortable. I figure that is why the pillows are there. And I would probably ask to have blinds closed if the light was in my eyes.

One T asked at my first session if there was anything in the room she could adjust to make me more comfortable. I thought that was kind, but there was no way I was going to say yes at that first session.

T3 is always cold and always has a space heater on; summer or winter. I know that, and I dress accordingly. I would not expect her to freeze.

I guess if it is a matter of my comfort, I ask for the change. After all, the customer is always right!

During the time you're in the office it's a shared space. Therapy is easier if you can feel comfortable there. There's probably nothing you can do about the furniture or floor covering or ugly desk or crappy artwork, but I think you're allowed to ask about the things that can be fairly easily changed. Even in my office at work I used dim florescent lights and a lamp--which made everything friendlier.

Nothing really to change, but we have adjusted seating arrangements and also heating, like I will say if too hot or cold.

No, I tend to not interact with anything in his office unless prompted to. He seemed a little bit too excited when I asked to use one of the books from his bookshelf, so I haven't done it since.

I don't think I have ever asked a therapist to change things in the room. Actually I wish the therapists I saw had paid more attention to the confort of the room for their clients' sake. I saw a therapist for two months and she practiced from home. I would see her in a room that looked like her library (which I liked because I love books and love looking at what people are reading ) but her whole house always smelled of food, like she had cooked a big stew right before my arrival. Awful. I hate food smells. I never asked her if I could open the window because she didn't seem very agreeable (and she wasn't). I also saw a male therapist (only once thankfully) whose office smelled of pipe smoke and actually there were all kinds of pipes hanging on the walls. He was collecting them I guess. The fact that he never thought that this could inconvenience his clients is baffling.

No never, I would like to change everything in her room. It’s a horrible therapy room, like Simone projectile vomited all over it. The colour schemes, the paintings everything is wrong, I thought I would grow to like it but no. My t obviously likes it. Her chair is very far away from mine, sometimes I wish it was closer. I seen her in another office a few times and her chair was too close.

Omg dictators! Who were they really? I assume they weren’t actually them!