[jessebnov]

I posted a while back about choosing between two therapists.. I ended up ditching both of them because that's what I do I suppose 😡

I started online therapy out of curiosity and have been "seeing" this gal since the beginning of February. It's been going good. She's surprisingly good at calling me out and literally reading between the lines, especially when it comes to attachment issues.

Here's the thing: she's on vacation all this month. She told me weeks ahead of time, no big deal. I told her it was fine because I'm not attached yet. Right before she left I told her I was anxious about it and talked about things I've done in the past in this situation. I assured her I'd be fine while she was gone etc. I just wanted to reassure myself that I'm better than I used to be. She reassured me as well and wrote some stuff about caring about my feelings which seemed kind of off topic but she usually has a point when she seems off topic so I didn't think about it much.

I didn't hear from her the first two weeks and now I'm getting short notes daily and pictures. It's not a conversation really. I'm not talking about myself or soliciting info. I make comments on the pictures - such as looks fun, have a good time etc. - but I'm respectful of her vacation and am not therapy-ing or asking her to work. She's still sending them though!

I might be paranoid, but is this her way of checking up on me? Or being there sort of? I don't get it. I'd never impose on her vacation and didn't expect to hear from her at all but I can't tell if I need to keep the coversation going or just thumbs up the pictures or if she's giving me an opening to check in?

Just so confused! I know this might not be relevant to many people because it's different in face to face therapy, but any ideas? Do therapists usually check in on extended vacations? Is this a protective thing to make sure I'm ok while she's gone...without fully opening the door to therapy time? How am I supposed to feel?

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

I am not sure about online therapy. But I can say that some Ts in face to face therapy offer something like a check-in call once a week if they are on vaccation and similar things. However, certainly not daily pictures and notes. On the one hand because the client sees the T once a week, maybe twice, and doesn't suddenly need 7 days a week just because T is a bit further away. On the other hand it's also because one important part of therapy is that you learn to also be on your own. Nobody can check up on you 24/7 and that's an important lesson to learn. I think getting a picture a day would be inappropriate for face to face therapy, and I can honestly not see why online therapy should be different.

I don't think there is a 'supposed to feel'. How do you feel about it? Think about whether it is overall helping you and whether you think this is an okay and good thing to do. I can tell you that I would not feel comfortable with such a situation, but that doesn't mean it can't be okay to do.

[MoxieDoxie]

Yes my therapist always sent me pictures of him and his wife on vacations from kissing a sting ray to hanging on the beach. I had a problem with object consistency and that really helped.