[junkDNA]

wanted to get some info on other people's therapy

does your therapist ever talk about the end of therapy? how do they talk about it? how does it make you feel? throughout your whole time in therapy was it discussed that it would end at some point? was there a timeline or deadline given?

my t has never mentioned the end of therapy for me. I find it a bit odd as we are going on 8 years now. however I am also glad because if he were to bring up the end of my therapy I would most likely be devastated. I also feel that my t and I are still doing a lot of work on my recovery and it doesn't make much sense that its even near time to end therapy

I'm just wondering what is typical.

does it seem odd my t has never brought it up? I wonder what he sees for the future with my therapy. is he ok with us going forever? does he think I'll be in therapy with him forever? and what is it that I actually want? of course child part wants t forever

Yes for me a timeline was given (a "we can only give you this number of sessions" thing) (((((junkdna)))))

[Echos Myron redux]

We've touched on it a tiny bit but not much. I don't like talking about it. He said he wants to help me work through everything "however long it takes" and I guess your T feels similarly, that he has an open mind about how long that will be. Bringing it up would likely trigger fears of abandonment and that probably doesn't feel necessary as he has no intention of abandoning you.

[DP_2017]

I won't allow the topic. Stirs up too many emotions

It's pretty much only me that brings it up. If she does it's only to talk about why I am routinely trying to quit when everyone else under the sun (except for me) knows that I don't want to ever. Eta: oh and we just passed the 6.5 year mark)

[CharlieStarDust]

She'd bring it up randomly and very abstractly in the beginning-one particularly bad day, I freaked on her when she brought it up. Since then, we've discussed how therapy is helpful, and if it continues to be helpful to me, then why stop. She agreed, and that was the end of that. I have no plans on stopping any time soon.

[ElectricManatee]

We've talked about it a little bit, in terms of her goal with all her clients being to get them to where they don't need to come in anymore. I don't feel like she has a timeline, even though I feel like my progress is incredibly slow. She said that it took thirty years to get to where I am, so I'm not going to get better overnight.

I also know that her door is always open as long as she's still practicing, so it's okay if I decide I'm done and then come back later when/if something changes. I've already done that once, so I do have a sense of what it's like to be done for the time being.

[stopdog]

I brought it up from the beginning. I never had a therapist who wanted to talk about it.

It used to come up but it would send me in a downward spiral. Now we just never talk about it. It's my therapy at my pace and she never pushes me to stop or space out my sessions and I appreciate that from her.

[LonesomeTonight]

Current T has talked about the end in general terms, not regarding me in particular, when I talked about termination with ex-MC. He said if a client is coming in and they regularly run out of things to talk about after 10 minutes or if they're just chit-chatting and not really working on anything for multiple sessions, that tends to suggest the end to him. But that it tends to be up to the client. Ex-MC only talked about it if I brought it up and would emphasize he wasn't trying to get rid of me/us, but say how "when" we thought was about time for it, could discuss it, maybe spacing out sessions, etc. How we're always welcome to come back (which he also said when we eventually did terminate a month or so ago). Ex-T never really talked about it, except to say, when I asked, that she was OK staying in touch over e-mail with a client who terminated.

[zoiecat]

I am always the one to bring it up and ask him how long before I am better. He always gives a generic answer and tells me it is a process. I have DID, PTSD, and MDD so I know it will take awhile. I just don't want to be in therapy forever.

I am currently starting another denial phase where I am telling myself I just made it all up so I can convince myself there's nothing wrong with me and quit therapy. He is patiently waiting for me to come around again we've been down this path before. I swear he has the patience of a saint.

[lunatic soul]

I had free sessions for a month and I asked to give me one more month but they didnt and I find out that other patient who I knew got it.
I was really mad and desperate because I needed to search for new T because she said she cant see me even if I payed her.
But it differs from your story. I knew it at the begining.

I left my former t without saying it because I was mad at him. Then I left my next t because he annoyed me.
So I havent been in longterm therapy.
I really like my new T but I have issues with money so I dont know how long I could see her but I like her better than those previous Ts (except the T who was my T for 3 weeks)

[ruh roh]

Mine is going to retire and move away sooner than I would like. She doesn't know how my therapy will wind down, that she doesn't know what she'll be doing and lacks details. When I asked if I need to start cutting down at some point or will it be just a sudden end, she said she hadn't thought through that. It's very stressful, but she doesn't seem to be all that interested in talking about it since there isn't much to say. She is not psychodynamic or relational, so on her end it's probably more about wrapping up and turning off the light switch. Although she said at one point she might work one day a week wherever she lives and we could do some kind of electronic session. But that is not firm.

I imagine you'll see your therapist as long as you want/need to and even if you decided you don't need to, he seems like the type to leave the door open for check ins. He's got a baby, so he'll be working for a long time to come to put baby t through school and college.

[ScarletPimpernel]

We've talked about how we're going to taper down, and how therapy will be. We've talked about what happens when she retires or if she moves.

[velcro003]

not really. one of my fears (much less now) is that she'll get sick of me, or tell me i am hopeless and end therapy with me. she has told me over and over that if i keep coming and find some value in it, that she will be here. she still has a weekly phone call with a client when she lived in a different state yearrsssss ago.

[Fuzzybear]

The therapy (uk) was supposedly open ended. But the t turned ..and abandoned me.

I’m happy you have a good therapist

[precaryous]

We’ve talked about the end of therapy since she’s in her 70’s. T says she will tell me a year in advance of her retirement.

the only thing mine has said is that we will always talk and always be part of each others lives.

Actually now that I think about it, last week when we were kinda on the subject (talking about how I routinely try to "leave her before she can leave me") she said that most people eventually get to a point where they say "I can do my own work now, let's just do check-ins sometimes." But I go back and forth between wanting to come more often but not letting myself and wanting to quit at regular intervals.

[toomanycats]

No timeline.
C and I have talked about it a ton because the traumatic end of therapy with S is one of the biggest reasons I'm in therapy with him now.
C has said he will see me up til he retires if I want (and tells me that's still a long way off)..and that I never have to progress or anything even.
I progress anyways, of course.

[nottrustin]

I once asked her a question (don't remember what) and she interpreted it as me asking about her thinking I waa in therapy so long and asking her of.she wanted to quit. She told me that she will not quit unless I want to or if she felt I was no longer making progress. Some I am still making process she want going to quit. That was not what I was asking but I appreciated the information.

The only she mentioned finishing therapy always in one of my bee first appointments she made a joke thay included if I as still seeing her in 10 years My husband would come knocking on her door asking what kind of therapist is she.... that was 11 years ago...when she didn't know the depth of a lot of my issues. T is still very supportive of me seeing her because he sees steady but slow progress.

[Elio]

We talk about in general ways and in terms of my fears around it. We've also talked of never really ending.

[nottrustin]

Emdr T and I have never really discussed it. I went in thinking it would be very short term. She thought so because of how I put on such a good face and talk like I am emotionally better place than I am (T filled her in because sh was confused by what I was saying didn't fit what she was seeing). So we have both agreed it will take a while but will work through it together.

[Mully]

I bring it up a lot more than my T does. She’s acknowledged it in the past but I probably bring it up a few times a year now. I didn’t even think about it until we started dealing with tougher stuff and then her husband very suddenly passed away and she was MIA for six months. It was understandable that she needed time but it was so unexpected and triggered all of my abandonment fears. She is also older so I became obsessed with the idea of her retiring.

That said, she always tells me that all of the biggest transitions are behind her now, and she’s still here. She reduced her days in office after he died and she says it was so that she could keep working for longer, and that as of now she has no plans to retire in the next five years. She understands that my particular issues are long term and she’s optimistic we can make serious progress in the time she has left. I hate it all, though! I don’t want to be in therapy forever but I also can’t deal with life without her at this point.

[amicus_curiae]

For me therapy ends when I go up in smoke. I see therapy as ½ of my treatment, medications being the other one-half. Therapy is similar to my ICD — pacing the beats of my heart, quite shocking at times. Am I a therapy addict? I’ve never been addicted to anything, but I could be a therapy addict.

Ending therapy isn’t one of my goals. Never had a shrink mention it and I’ve never asked.