[sunrise]

So in our couples session earlier this week, T was telling about how two of his clients are friends and sometimes get together for a drink. And one time they were discussing how they both see T for therapy. One guy comes more frequently than the other, and he said for him it was just like going to see a mechanic for a tune-up. Seeing T every so often was essential, a mental health tune-up. Then T said he had known one of these guys for 15 years!!! He didn't say he has been my client for 15 years, but do you think that could be? Most people don't know a T in another context and then become their client, do they?

I am thinking of how in one of our first sessions, T told me that he doesn't do longterm therapy, which he considers anything over 3 years. So I have had this message in my mind that the longest I could possibly see T was for 3 years. I am at the 13 month mark right now, which is almost halfway to 3 years. Now he drops that 15 year comment. He's given me hope.

Do you think he would see someone for 15 years? I would love to not have to completely say good-bye to T one day. Maybe I could just come for "tune-ups" every few months after I am out of my intense therapy phase.

[MissCharlotte]

Gee sunny,

I worry about ending also. But if I see T for 15 years, wow, we will both be over retirement age. LOL

I do know he was seeing one guy for 5 years because he mentioned it, in the context of scheduling.

I do think tune ups are an excellent idea and a good way to keep in touch with the love of your life!

[ECHOES]

I think probably his 3 years statement was a general rule or an average of some kind. And sometimes they have to say things like that for insurance, though I know your insurance doesn't cover him.

My former therapist, a psychologist who did hypnotherapy, talked about her clients leavning and then coming back when they needed to. It sounded pretty open-ended.

Will you ask him about this, do you think?

[Perna]

I saw my T for 9 years, we terminated for 9 years and then I saw her again for another 9 years! Theoretically I knew her for 27 years :-)

Lots of people see a therapist off-and-on in their lives; my high school girlfriend who is a T sees her therapist that way; when she has a problem. So maybe you won't see your T for more than 3 years at a stretch but over time. . .

Too bad my T retired in 2005; now I'll have to find another T for 2014 :-)

[Mouse_]

My T said it takes as long as it takes and that some people like to come back every 3months or so for a tune up. She said it depends on how far down the mental illness ladder you are as to how long it can take.

15 years? That's it? lol.... I expect to be seeing my T for 115. My T acts as though there is no limit to therapy, as if he will never retire, and termination is not really needed. I am still obsessed with him dropping the bombshell one day that he is leaving. He believe that there doesn't necessarily have to be something "wrong" with you in order to keep coming to therapy. But then again, at the rate I'm going, I really don't need to be worrying about being cured and terminating as a result, haha...

Sunny, have you ever spoken with your T about this? With the type of relationship you two have, I can't imagine you not going to see him as long as needed. I used to see my 1st T for "tune-ups" as well. Or I would just call her when I needed. It was a really nice "insurance" to have, you knoww what I mean?

[ECHOES]

hmmm. Thinking about those "tune-ups".

I think this old jalopy called ECHOES will require weekly tune-ups.

...

[sunrise]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
pinksoil said:
Sunny, have you ever spoken with your T about this?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Hi pink, yes, well he spoke to me about it in one of our first sessions, over a year ago. He told me he does not do longterm therapy, which he considers anything over 3 years. It seems like he was being upfront with a new client and clearly laying out his boundaries. But now he has told me he sees a client he has known for 15 years. 15 years of therapy? (Or maybe he knew the guy for 12 years first outside of therapy and has only seen him as a client for 3 years?) And this guy comes for regular tune-ups. So now I have hope I could see T for longer then 3 years. I like your analogy of being able to see the T occasionally as "insurance." I would like that someday too.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
pinksoil said:
He believe that there doesn't necessarily have to be something "wrong" with you in order to keep coming to therapy.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">I agree!

ECHOES, you always find the best pictures.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
ECHOES said:
My former therapist, a psychologist who did hypnotherapy, talked about her clients leavning and then coming back when they needed to. It sounded pretty open-ended.

Will you ask him about this, do you think?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">No, we have too much going on right now with the divorce to talk about stuff like this. For example, I had a major rupture with my lawyer the last week, and almost lost her. We need to deal with issues like that, not to mention the family issues right now surrounding the separation, and the financial issues too. As I said in another thread, I long for the simpler days of therapy when we could talk about stuff like this. Maybe one day we will be there again.