[annielovesbacon]

Has anyone ever gone to therapy with the knowledge that it would be very short term? I am moving to another state for three months, and a friend suggested I find a new therapist while I am there, until I can come home and see my regular T.

I'm not sure how I feel about that. It takes me a long time to open up, and I don't want to potentially develop an attachment when I know I'm going to leave. How much progress can be made in three months, anyway? Is it worth paying for therapy just to go and rant?

If anyone has experience with this, or just advice in general, I would love to hear.

[WarmFuzzySocks]

annie, do you think it might be worth it for a backup? If you start feeling like you need extra support while you’re there, you’d already have established at least a working relationship with someone who could provide it.

[ElectricManatee]

Given how much you have struggled at times lately, I absolutely think you should do it. The extra support could be helpful while you're in a new place. I think you could think about it as an experiment. Maybe you want to try to see if you can open up more quickly. Maybe you can see what it's like to go once a week. (I used to go every other week at my university counseling center, and going more often now that my T is in private practice makes a HUGE difference.) You could try a different style of therapy or a male T or an older T. You could decide on one specific goal or issue that you think you can work on in a few months.

Anyway, my point is that there are a bunch of reasons to try shorter-term therapy. I bet you could even get the appointment scheduled now so you don't have to wait to get started when you get to where you're going.

[malika138]

Hi
During a 6 month academic sabbatical in another country, I saw a t. I used it to help balance the day-to-day challenges that overwhelm me. Both the t and I knew it was short-term. I also sent an email to my regular t once a month with brief updates, as a way to stay connected with her. Seeing a t during this short term (albeit twice as long as your interval) was definitely worth it to me.

[LonesomeTonight]

I think you should try it. When I started seeing my current T, it was only intended to be a month or two, for consultation on stuff I was struggling with regarding my marriage counselor (and a bit with ex-T). I thought it would be hard to open up to someone new, but I actually found it much easier than with ex-T because I'd been in therapy before. I'd already shared much of my story and embarrassing, shameful things with someone else (really, two people, since also with ex-MC), so it was easier to open up to a new person. Plus, it's like I knew which things were more important to share, since I'd already addressed much of it before (like, I knew what was more resolved vs. what is still a major issue for me).

As I mentioned, I had initially planned to see now-current T for a limited amount of time to address specific issues. So maybe that's something you could do with this T--say, "I want to focus on getting help with x and y." Or if it's that you want general support, but don't want to go into your whole life story, I think that's another way to go.

Definitely worth a shot though.

[AllHeart]

I can see where a short term t would be good to lend support to help cope with daily stresses and what not for the 3-months. It might be a nice safety net to have a t in place. Knowing it would be a short term gig, you wouldn't have to delve into the deep stuff and you may not be as prone to become attached to the t.

On the other hand, do you think you would benefit from a 3-month therapy break? If so, would your regular t be willing to do Skype or phone sessions with you once in a while if you needed them?

[annielovesbacon]

Originally Posted by AllHeart

On the other hand, do you think you would benefit from a 3-month therapy break? If so, would your regular t be willing to do Skype or phone sessions with you once in a while if you needed them?

I actually just got back from a three-month break -- I was abroad and just got back. I thought I would get to see my T for two sessions before I leave again, but I only got to see her once (unless she has any cancellations). I think that, while it was good for me to be on my own for a while and think through my problems without therapy, I don't need another break.

[annielovesbacon]

Thank you everyone for your advice... I really am considering seeing a short term T. Would it be weird to talk to a new T to work out problems with my current T? For example there are many things I want/need to talk to my T about, but I am too afraid or feel weird about it because I feel like it's "too late" (silly, I know). Would it be weird to talk through that with another T? I feel like it's weird to see a T just to talk about another T.

For me at this point of my life. I'd not bother or need short term therapy.
Because of the length of time I've been in therapy already, I'm quite resilient now. Plus, it's about the relationship now more than not being able to cope.

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by annielovesbacon

Thank you everyone for your advice... I really am considering seeing a short term T. Would it be weird to talk to a new T to work out problems with my current T? For example there are many things I want/need to talk to my T about, but I am too afraid or feel weird about it because I feel like it's "too late" (silly, I know). Would it be weird to talk through that with another T? I feel like it's weird to see a T just to talk about another T.

Nope, not weird. I mean, a main reason I went to see my current T was to talk about my MC (and a bit about my ex-T). When I initially asked if he was open to meeting with me on a short-term basis to deal with some of those issues, he said he'd done similar "consultation" things with clients before. So I don't think it's that uncommon. You would also have the advantage, since you'd be in a different location, that the short-term T most likely wouldn't know your current T, so you could talk very freely. (Even if she did somehow know her, she'd have to keep your info confidential unless you gave her consent.)

Also, I wonder if talking about these issues with a short-term T might make it easier to bring them up to long-term T once you're back in town. Since then you've already shared them.

[ElectricManatee]

Originally Posted by annielovesbacon

Thank you everyone for your advice... I really am considering seeing a short term T. Would it be weird to talk to a new T to work out problems with my current T? For example there are many things I want/need to talk to my T about, but I am too afraid or feel weird about it because I feel like it's "too late" (silly, I know). Would it be weird to talk through that with another T? I feel like it's weird to see a T just to talk about another T.

I don't think it's weird at all. I know some people think that talking in therapy about therapy is pointless or self-indulgent or whatever, but I could not disagree more. I find that I can get to the deepest core stuff about myself when I'm analyzing the therapeutic relationship, either with my T or with somebody else. Talking about why I can't open up about something or where my T and I have gotten stuck or why I disagree with her so vehemently about something has been really powerful. People are relational creatures, and that's part of what can make the therapeutic relationship a useful focal point.

I agree with LT that you would have the added benefit of knowing that Temp T wouldn't know Regular T personally. That might help you feel confident that Temp T can be more objective.

[katydid777]

Originally Posted by annielovesbacon

Has anyone ever gone to therapy with the knowledge that it would be very short term? I am moving to another state for three months, and a friend suggested I find a new therapist while I am there, until I can come home and see my regular T.

I'm not sure how I feel about that. It takes me a long time to open up, and I don't want to potentially develop an attachment when I know I'm going to leave. How much progress can be made in three months, anyway? Is it worth paying for therapy just to go and rant?

If anyone has experience with this, or just advice in general, I would love to hear.

I haven't had a temporary T, but I am like you. It takes me a long time to open up. It took my last T almost 2 years for me to open up to her, then she had to move, so I start with a new T Fri. I hope we can connect. Anyway, my answer would be no I wouldn't do it. If I had a problem while I was away, I would ether call my T, or the hotline.

I guess it depends what the purpose of the therapy is. I did not when I first entered therapy and, for a good while, I planned it to be long-term. From my experience and all I know about therapy now, if I ever chose to do it again, I would only do short term. Go with a specific problem/goal, focus on that, and leave when I think therapy no longer adds anything to that process. I would use it as consultation and would stop when I am not learning anything useful. If I primarily needed support, I would rather try to find it in my everyday life.

I don't think anything is weird to talk about with a therapist if that's what you want. I am also one of those who would not use therapy to resolve another therapy conflict but many people find it useful and discussing problems with another T might be a very specific goal that may not take ages, so perhaps short term is ideal for that?

[katydid777]

Originally Posted by katydid777

I haven't had a temporary T, but I am like you. It takes me a long time to open up. It took my last T almost 2 years for me to open up to her, then she had to move, so I start with a new T Fri. I hope we can connect. Anyway, my answer would be no I wouldn't do it. If I had a problem while I was away, I would ether call my T, or the hotline.

I already know that if I am not doing paperwork this first time, we will be talking about my MIL. She has caused nothing but trouble from the day she was brought here, and yesterday is my breaking point. I took her to a eye Dr. she wouldn't get her eyes dilated, she has cataracks, and needs bifocal glasses. The biggest part was she lied about all 3 of those, and said the Dr. and her, she said things weren't said, and more or less called me a lier. She has one more apt. next week with the Pdoc. and if she don't go she won't get her meds, that she wants so bad. After that I am done, except to get her out of my house. We are going to try to pressure her to get her eyes dilated, so the Dr, can see how bad her eyes rily are.

[annielovesbacon]

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Nope, not weird. I mean, a main reason I went to see my current T was to talk about my MC (and a bit about my ex-T). When I initially asked if he was open to meeting with me on a short-term basis to deal with some of those issues, he said he'd done similar "consultation" things with clients before. So I don't think it's that uncommon. You would also have the advantage, since you'd be in a different location, that the short-term T most likely wouldn't know your current T, so you could talk very freely. (Even if she did somehow know her, she'd have to keep your info confidential unless you gave her consent.)

Also, I wonder if talking about these issues with a short-term T might make it easier to bring them up to long-term T once you're back in town. Since then you've already shared them.

I actually thought of you when considering seeing a second T! Thank you for responding, I really appreciate your perspective.

[amicus_curiae]

If your disorders are short-term, I don’t think that short-term therapy would be out of contention. This is maybe/future; Lech Wałęsa, your past, all is past, old man Lech.

When it’s dusky-days-a-leavin’ you need to grieve more than you think possible, now, and you need every minute of a comforting voice. That’s now. Like, wow, you really mean it, Harold.

Is there anything in the short-term that you could do that would make a positive statement with tomorrow’s tales? That’s the future.

Yesterday, today, tomorrow. Not three different times, but three durations. Time is the hands on your watch. Durations flitter/flutter like my flumby heart.

It all comes down to what you need.