[wanttolivebetter]

I love fashion and shopping, so I have a lot of nice dresses, blouses, high heels, accessories, etc. However, I rarely get to wear them because I hardly ever go anywhere more exciting than the grocery store due to my anxiety and depression, combined with my almost complete lack of friends. Sometimes when I'm getting ready for my therapy sessions, I'll see a fun, unique pair of shoes that I never wear or a fancy (not like cocktail dress fancy haha) dress and think about wearing it just because I'm actually "going somewhere" for once. I always stop myself and slip on a plain pair of jeans and flats instead because I don't want my therapist to think I'm trying to send her a message or impress her or whatever.

For the record, by "attention-drawing," I mean just unique items that tend to get noticed by strangers if I wear them to the mall or wherever, like I have a pair of 4-inch heels with a crazy design on them. I don't mean club wear or anything haha.

[fille_folle]

Inappropriate? No. But if you suddenly start wearing completely different stuff, your T might wonder what's up.

[Argonautomobile]

I don't see what th problem is. Wear whatever you want. Sounds nice. We can never know what another person might privately assume. Which is an excellent topic for therapy.

[toomanycats]

Not inappropriate
I mean... I wouldn't show up in something TOO fancy, but wear what makes you feel good.

[Travelinglady]

I see nothing wrong with it if that's the way you are and what you enjoy!

[growlycat]

When I wear nicer clothes or more jewelry than usual t notices but also makes the assumption I am doing better than I am. So if I’m trying to hide a depressive funk I’ll dress up a little more and wear more makeup than usual

[maybeblue]

I actually dress up a little for therapy. I am not in love with my therapist, and I don't really do it to impress him. I do it because if I feel like I look ok then I feel more confident and it is easier to open up. I even wear makeup, which I hardly ever do otherwise.

If you feel confident and happy in flashy clothes go for it. Your therapist will probably comment on it, but I doubt she will make it the focus of the session.

[wanttolivebetter]

Originally Posted by maybeblue

I actually dress up a little for therapy. I am not in love with my therapist, and I don't really do it to impress him. I do it because if I feel like I look ok then I feel more confident and it is easier to open up. I even wear makeup, which I hardly ever do otherwise.

If you feel confident and happy in flashy clothes go for it. Your therapist will probably comment on it, but I doubt she will make it the focus of the session.

I'm kind of the same. I don't wear full makeup very often, but I'm extremely uncomfortable if I don't wear it to therapy. The idea of sitting that close to someone for so long with all of my skin imperfections, dark under-eye circles, sparse eyebrows, etc. on display makes me extremely uncomfortable and self-conscious. I seem to have this counterintuitive need to present myself to people whose job it literally is to help me with my problems in a way that suggests I'm feeling and doing much better than I really am. I do it with doctors too. They'd probably take my concerns more seriously if I came into their office actually looking like someone who isn't feeling so hot. Yet, shortly before my appointment, I find myself grabbing for my makeup bag and hair straightener to cover up all of the signs that I'm feeling unwell. Go figure. I don't get it.

[Nammu]

Why don't you tell you T just what you said here? That you need a place to wear your fun clothes, I'm sure your T would encourage it.

[wanttolivebetter]

Originally Posted by growlycat

When I wear nicer clothes or more jewelry than usual t notices but also makes the assumption I am doing better than I am. So if I’m trying to hide a depressive funk I’ll dress up a little more and wear more makeup than usual

Yep, this is exactly what I do. I really don't get why I'm so self-conscious about letting someone whose job it is to help me feel better see the visible signs that I need help, yet I have no qualms about walking into the grocery store looking like a hot mess for dozens of people to see. The only thing I've been able to come up with is that I'm going into the health care field, so maybe I subconsciously want people like doctors, therapists, dentists, etc. to perceive and respect me as someone who has their stuff together.

[downandlonely]

I think it's ok to dress up a little. Sounds like a good topic to talk about with your T.

[atisketatasket]

I had a therapist show up once dressed to go clubbing. So I say dress how you like.

[LonesomeTonight]

I think it's OK to dress up a bit. I mean, not like you're going to a wedding or prom or something, but otherwise OK. I tend to accessorize more (necklace, bracelets, etc.) when going to T to give me something to fidget with, but from the outside, could look dressed up. And I'll wear fairly casual dresses sometimes in the summer because it's hot.

[Wonderfalls]

For a few years I had appointments in the middle of my work day, so I was coming to therapy in a suit with jewelry and makeup. When I left the job I reverted to jeans, never going as far as a tee shirt with pictures or writing, which is what I would rather do.


But once in awhile I dressed up for my appointments. I think you definitely should. He may be surprised at first but you can just tell him honestly that you need somewhere to wear your fancy clothes, if you want.

[satsuma]

Sometimes we kind of "practice" or learn things in therapy which then transfer over into the rest of life. So if you start with wearing your nice clothes to therapy, maybe after a while you will feel comfortable wearing them to go other places as well. Since you chose then, it seems like it would be nice if you could wear them to go out to places?

[annielovesbacon]

Originally Posted by maybeblue

I actually dress up a little for therapy. I am not in love with my therapist, and I don't really do it to impress him. I do it because if I feel like I look ok then I feel more confident and it is easier to open up. I even wear makeup, which I hardly ever do otherwise.

If you feel confident and happy in flashy clothes go for it. Your therapist will probably comment on it, but I doubt she will make it the focus of the session.

I feel the exact same way, feeling confident makes it easier for me to open up, and I feel more confident when I feel pretty and well-dressed. Sometimes my T will compliment my outfit or my makeup which makes me feel good and is a nice start to a session. She has never asked why I look nice or anything but if she did, I'd just tell her exactly what I just said

[Lemoncake]

I used to dress up everyday when I had school in my 2nd year rather than just T-shirts and jeans. It really made me feel so much better.

Do the small thing that make you happy.

[greentires4me]

I wear concert tshirts and digi camo pants...I flashy flashy but comfortable.

My norm is to wear attention-gathering clothing; hippy like wear with plenty of bright scarves and boots. When warm enough I like to show off my tattoos across my chest and down my back. I usually have pretty wild hair too - faux hawks and colourful. This is the norm though. When it comes to attending therapy and psychiatric appointments I dress really down; even quite dowdy. No make up and flattened boring hair. Why the difference? I suppose I don't want the therapist or psychiatrist to associate my 'out-there' appearance with mania. I also don't want them to misconstrue my attention seeking with a sign my confidence and self worth are healthy and stable when in fact it is the opposite (the best defence is a good offence sort of thing).