[MRT6211]

I saw this article from the Might about mental illness being treated like a crime, and it brought up some memories for me:
https://www.facebook.com/MentalHealt...16574898611217

Many of us have probably been there...afraid to tell our T or even seek out therapy to begin with because we don’t want to disclose our suicidal thoughts and be unnecessarily involuntarily hospitalized.
I know, for me, my first ever experience with the mental health system was nothing short of traumatizing. I had been seriously struggling with depression and anxiety while in college, and the first time I went to a counselor at the counseling center, she told me to “just get more sleep.” She knew from the forms I filled out that I had suicidal thoughts, but she didn’t care. No follow up appointment scheduled or anything, just instructions to sleep more, which I couldn’t do because of stress, not having time, and crippling anxiety.
A few months after that, as I was struggling tremendously, in a rage fit I had told a roommate of mine that I was contemplating suicide. At that point I was moreso passively suicidal than actively suicidal. But no one bothered to even ask me about that. Instead, when my roommate went to the counseling center to talk to someone about it, they immediately called the police to come and get me, without any attempt to reach out to me first. I was taking a nap, finally having a few hours before I went to teach that night to get some much needed sleep. I wake up to extremely loud banging on my bedroom door. It’s an officer. He asks me to step out of my room. I am very confused, especially because I had made that comment to my roommate 4 days before this happened. They told me that I didn’t have any choice but to go to the hospital with them. I started to cry, they told me “crying won’t help you here.” They told me it was my best option to go with them without a fight. I did. But I was escorted through my apartment building by police as people I knew looked on. I was also handcuffed once we got out to the car and all the way into the hospital. It was humiliating and nothing up to that point had ever made me want to die more, honestly. But obviously at this point, I wasn’t going to tell them that.
Once I was at the hospital, I was treated like a criminal. Forced to give blood and urine without my consent, watched by a security guard who yelled at me if I cursed when I was on the phone with my mom. At one point I said “you can’t possibly keep me here against my will, I didn’t commit any crime and I’m not a danger to myself.” The nurse replied “we can do whatever we want to you, because suicide is a crime and you threatened to commit suicide, so really you said you were going to commit a crime.” Everyone there just yelled at me and no one even tried to comfort me. I was taken into a room and a nurse was talking to me and assessing me, throughout which I just kept saying “I really don’t want to kill myself, I just don’t really want to be alive. But I have no plans to kill myself. I just wish some external force would take my life.” The nurse left and went to talk to a doctor. The doctor, who had never seen me, wanted to admit me. When the nurse told me this, I FREAKED out, as this would ruin everything with school for me, and probably jeopardize my ability to get into medical school later. I told her she was making everything worse. I had her call my friend, he assured her he didn’t think I was a danger to myself, and that he would look after me if/when I got out. She eventually convinced the doctor to let me go. They discharged me with a script for Vistaril and no further care. I wasn’t set up or referred to a therapist, psychiatrist, or any help whatsoever. I didn’t have a primary care doctor. I had no support, but no one cared, they did their part.
Did the school counseling center ever reach out to me? Nope. No one even attempted to help me. Several weeks later, I schedule another appointment with them, and got paired with the same counselor as the last time. Once again, all she said was “get more sleep.” And as I was trying to explain the problem, she cut me off and ended our session abruptly.
The mental health system failed me. Luckily, the next semester I was able to get in with a counselor who really helped me, and then another one after that who was even better. When I left my university for my medical school, I got paired with an awful therapist (you can read my previous posts about her), and I ended up being hospitalized 4 times, the last time after a very serious suicide attempt. I think things wouldve gone better had I been hospitalized sooner the first time, but of course I was scared and resistant, given my prior experience.
I feel like the mental health system frequently fails people, especially because we treat mental patients like criminals. Even if you look at how the hospital works, it’s literally like a jail. You have limited to no rights and privileges, most of your stuff gets confiscated, you get strip searched, you are told when to do what with little choice, you are watched 24/7, if you act up they either strap you down and sedate you or put you in solitary confinement, you have limited to no outside time, and they can hold you against your will. I get that most of that is for our own safety, but I feel like there are better and more sensitive ways to treat people with mental illness. It would be nice if they actually did real therapy in the hospital, too. In my experience, hospitals either offer very little individual work, or none at all.
Anyway, that’s my rant about how bad our mental healthcare system is (at least in the US). My food for thought is this: what about if in mental health crisis centers, they actually had therapists that you could talk through your crisis with, rather than just people to evaluate you? I feel like most of my crises could have been dealt with in that way, rather than just being sent to the hospital unnecessarily for 1-2 weeks. Alright, I’ll get off my soapbox now....

[dlantern]

At the very least, there are sharing a negative that you can at least say that .....they aren't perfect

[Fuzzybear]

This sounds appalling, to say the least

It reminds me of the phrase “man’s inhumanity to man”....

[downandlonely]

That sounds awful, MRT. I have found shortcomings with the mental health system too. I tried to voluntarily hospitalize myself because of depression and was told I couldn't stay because I wasn't suicidal. I just wanted a place where I could get the right medication, do therapy, and recover without stress. The hospital wasn't that place. I don't know if there are any places like that in the US anymore.

[junkDNA]

I was handcuffed and hauled 4 hours away by 2 strangers when I was 16. I was put against my will into a troubled teen wilderness facility where they physically and psychologically tortured us. it has since been under investigation for child abuse and was bought out by a different company and is a much better place now from what I've heard. I was trapped there for 8 months. I could write a whole book about that place and what they did to us and what I experienced and witnessed.

[here today]

It's no longer called "mental health" in many locations and doctors'/therapists' offices -- they call it "behavioral health." This is unfortunately the trend.

[tecomsin]

I am terrified of the so-called mental health system where I live. I have been hauled away numerous times and locked up against my will for a month at a time. This is in Canada. You have many more rights in the US than we have here.

I have never threatened or intended or even thought of suicide, nor have I threatened other people.

[The_little_didgee]

I was 'emotionally butchered' in an adolescent psychiatric unit in the 1990s. The place was all about delivering punishment, so we clients would conform to their 'image' of how a person was supposed to be. All I ever heard was how flawed I was along with my family which was BS. Being misdiagnosed and put on medication also contributed to what happened.

The unit psychiatrist was awful. What was she thinking trying to do psychoanalysis on teenagers?

I left that hospital profoundly hurt. The memories of that place still sting. This is felt beyond the client. My mother is also haunted by what happened. She admitted to me how helpless she felt when she witnessed me decline in that place.

I wish I could sue that hospital.