Needing an answer to a question but T still ignores you.

She said she "really needs to know." In my opinion, she is placing too much weight on her therapist's advice. Sure, she's allowed to ask for advice, but in my experience, professionals are wary of clients who lean too heavily on them in decision-making - and for good reason. I understand if she wants to know what her therapist thinks, but this should not be a case of NEEDS to know in order to make a decision.

I don't think comments asserting that OP should make the decision instead of relying on the therapist are about blaming OP and giving the therapist a pass. I would feel the same way if OP had received a response. The therapist is irrelevant. I do think she could have done better to respond and say, "I don't know. It's your decision," but that's clearly not what OP is looking for. That's what mine did when I asked her something difficult yesterday. But I don't think there's anything illogical about suggesting that OP is relying too heavily on someone else to make a decision - especially when that someone else isn't even involved in the outcome.

We've come down to two questions here. One, whether the OP/people have the right to expect their therapist to make decisions for them and two whether the OP has a right to have their email replied to.

I agree with some of the posters here that it isn't wrong for the OP to include their therapist in decision making. It is one thing to consult your therapist but to expect them to make the decision is a bit much. And I have the impression that this is just what the OP was alluding to. We are all ultimately responsible for our choices and actions. Asking for guidance is okay but asking another person to choose for you is shirking your responsibility.

The whole email debate has been going on strongly since I joined PsychCentral. I've made it clear my own views on this. Regardless however of which side of the fence you sit on you have got to realise that this has got to be in agreement between the two parties. Unless the therapist has suggested this as an accepted means of communication it would be unfair to expect them to do so. Has the OP been clear on this point that email is an agreed upon form of communication. If not, I suggest it is being unfair to the therapist.

So these are things however that the therapist does bear some responsibility for. If the OP has relied upon them in the past to make decisions, the therapist ought to have addressed this in therapy. And, as for the matter of emailing, the therapist I believe should have also sat down the client and discussed at some point their professional boundaries.

Also I wonder if there is more to this and that the Op is just testing the waters.
The OP seems to think they are not talking, have they had a rupture, if you are not talking to your t why would you send her such an email?
I think that it’s just a way of making her talk to you and your t feels manipulated. I am not sticking up for either but if I wasn’t on the best of terms with someone and they sent me an email wanting me to make a decision I would feel manipulated.