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#26
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I can call the clinic and ask her to call me. After I make the call to the clinic, I can drop her an email saying I called the clinic. That's in case the clinic drops the ball or gatekeeps, which they sometimes do. She doesn't reply to emails.
I find the calls helpful though I don't use it often. We'll talk if it becomes too frequent, and it currently is maybe once every two months though I've called twice in two weeks. Each call is about 10 to 30 minutes and she doesn't charge. I use the calls usually only when I've been dysregulated for many hours despite all my coping skills. I can text her and she'll read but not reply. |
#27
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All that outside contact with my T was like a drug and caused me more problems than I expected. The more I talked to him between sessions the more I craved and I would come up with things, even petty, things to email him about to get the attention. I became so attached with heavy transference I had to fix it by getting attention in another place that might or might not be good for me.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
#28
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The majority of my outside contact has been positive but we talked early on about his limits and my expectations from emailing. There have been a few times when his replies (or lack of reply which is rare but does happen) have not went well but, on a whole, its been incredibly helpful to have the option of outside contact.
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