Why cant it stay good

I have been hVing a pretty good week. My meds have kicked in so that helps my mood. Every evening I have had dinner or gatherings with different friends. One evening we even went to Ts favorite restaurant. I recognized it and smiled.

This morning I went to breakfast with my best friend. Then I went shopping and was enjoying feeling like I was getting things accomplished. Then out of nowhere it was like I was hit in the stomach by a baseball bat. Like that T popped into my head and it made me sad and had to go home.

I walked in the door and I read something about depression medications. Then I heard T say that she believed in our lifetime the mess will get better and there will be bloodwork that will tell them what you are actually suffering from and the meds that will help you. Then the tears came because it didnt happen on her lifetime. She was so optimistic and was looking forward to seeing this happen. She wanted to see me consistantly feel better.

I'm so sorry. This is so hard.

Just sending hugs...

I think the good times and good thoughts are 'real', and I hope that gradually it can become easier to hold onto them when the bad thoughts and feelings hit