[wheeler]

Do you have a picture of you and your T? Have you ever asked? If so, why did you want one?

I asked my T for one today and she said No. I’m trying to process both the answer and the question. It’s complicated.

Thanks

[SlumberKitty]

I don't have one of me and my T but I do have a couple of pictures of my former T that I got from her Psychology Today page and also from her website. I stored them on my phone. Kit

[susannahsays]

No. I hate having my picture taken, so there's no scenario in which I would request that to occur - with her or anyone else.

I saved prev t's pic from her psych today profile. I never asked her to let me take a pic of us. I am 110% sure she'd have said no. I wish it were possible though. I just want it. Not really sure I can explain why.

[wheeler]

I know I could google her and get a picture but that won’t work for me. I guess I
Want something more personal, which is where she draws the line. It’s like if it didn’t mean so much to me, she would be ok with it.

[Elio]

I have pictures and videos of my T from the web. I have not asked to take picture of her. I did ask to have time alone in old office to take picture of things before we moved. I didn't tell her until after that I took pictures of things.

[susannahsays]

Could it be a touch thing? If she is a no contact therapist, it would be hard to take a picture of both of you without touching.

Otherwise, I don't see why it's such a big deal.

[DP_2017]

Yes, many of them but It's not common for T's to allow it, so don't feel bad. I had a weird relationship with mine, I wanted them because it was like having pictures of a friend.... not a T... and he even offered me to take them sometimes, so it was completely ok but generally I see T's say no.

Maybe yours has a photo online on her website or something you can see?

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

I only have a picture of him without anyone else, from his website. I have never asked for a photo together with him, I think I would in certain circumstances (like if I knew he'd leave soon for a long time or permanently). I'm not sure how he'd respond either, I could see it go both ways.

[ScarletPimpernel]

I have pictures from her psychology today page and FB (just her; not her family or friends). She knows this. I don't have any pictures of us together because I hate my picture being taken.

I have quite a few pictures and videos of us together. we do things such as eat lunch somewhere or go feed birds, etcetera, and always take lots of photographs. We also have some very ridiculous looking selfies.

[coolibrarian]

I have pictures of T, her office, etc., but
none of the two of us together.

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by Starry_Night

I have quite a few pictures and videos of us together. we do things such as eat lunch somewhere or go feed birds, etcetera, and always take lots of photographs. We also have some very ridiculous looking selfies.

That sounds more like a friendship. I've not heard of T's taking clients to lunch and such.

[circlesincircles]

I asked for a photo with a former T upon termination (I was moving out of state). She agreed to it. That was 15 years ago. No idea where the photo is now, but I was relieved she was ok with it. I'm not sure how my current T would respond to that request.

Did you tell your T why you want the photo?

[scorpiosis37]

My ex-T and I took pictures together a couple of times. Granted, she also had boundary issues so i don’t know that she’s a role model to folllw. But I did appreciate having the photos when things were good— later on I took the pic of us down from my shelf when things were not good.

[nottrustin]

I never asked because it was not something I was interested. I do have a couple of pictures of her and her son at his wedding, plus one of just her. She emailed me the pictures. Since we had such lax boundaries I am sure she would allow it. As I said, though, I disnt care to.

Originally Posted by wheeler

Do you have a picture of you and your T? Have you ever asked? If so, why did you want one?

I asked my T for one today and she said No. I’m trying to process both the answer and the question. It’s complicated.

Thanks

No, never asked or thought much about it.

Why would she say no?

[rainbow8]

Yes, I have a photo of T and I together. We went for a walk outside during the summer and I asked if we could take a selfie together. She said yes without hesitation, and she took it. It's a really nice photo of both of us. I printed it on a regular sized paper.

Why did I want it? I suppose because I feel close to my T and I like her. It helps me to keep in mind that we have a real relationship even though it's a professional one.

I know that many Ts would think it's crossing a boundary to take a photo with a client, or that it's confusing because it's a friendly kind of thing. Did you discuss your reaction when your T said no? If not, it's probably a good idea to do so.

I asked my T about a month ago if I could take a photo of her in the therapy room. I explained why I wanted it. She said no, right away...

I've found some photos of her with her colleagues and friends.

[koru_kiwi]

i have a few photos of ex-T and me together. one is of us sitting on the floor with his dog the first time he brought his dog to a session and another one was taken as we sat next together celebrating my graduation from therapy...one of the benefits of having hubby join me in my sessions and he took the photos for us. the dog photo is my favourite out of all of them because at the time i did not realise that my husband was taking the photos on his phone and the joyful exchanges he captured of the moment between my ex-T and me are very authentic and natural....not forced poses.

[wheeler]

I started off the session by asking her if we could take a picture together. Actually I rambled for a bit fist, kind of telling her how I even came up with the thought. So because we do psychoanalysis she wanted to have a much more in-depth conversation about why I wanted the picture, what it meant to me. And then later in the conversation she wanted to know how a Yes or No answer would feel.

Funny, going into session I figured I had a 30% chance of her saying Yes, but the second after I asked I felt the air leave the room and knew her answer was No. Because she didn’t actually say No right away part of me felt like I had to come up with the ‘right’ answer to convince her to take the picture. That was hard. For my sake I knew I had to be honest and say exactly what I was thinking and feeling.

Even though she hadn’t actually said No yet I could feel myself getting angrier and angrier and I was starting to shutdown, which is what I usually do. I was aware of it and mostly kept myself from going down that path. I have to say I’m pretty proud of myself for staying in the conversation, that may be a first for me.

Even though I didn’t completely shutdown I didn’t take in everything thing that she said, but I think basically her reason for saying No was because it was too personal and there really is a valid reason to not cross that boundary. As she is going away for 2 weeks starting on Wednesday, we are meeting again today and I know we’ll continue this conversation and maybe I’ll get a better understanding of why she said No. And hopefully it will sit better with me.

[Lemoncake]

Nope not of us together, I've never asked though. I see him mainly online and in person only when I'm back in London. I tend to be a huge crier though so probs wouldn't be up for it xD.

I have loads from his website, but mainly from his wife's facebook page.