[WishfulThinker66]

I am done with the pussying around and merely skirting my issues. For goodness sake, let's just get to the meat and potatoes of my problem. Can we not simply address the elephant in the room? Can we not just identify the problem (I can tell her what it is, I don't need her to do so) and go straight to making a coping and or recovery plan?

I was sent to this woman in order to work on my PTSD and Anxiety. We have done a little on the later but we haven't even broached the subject of my past and the traumatic experiences causing it. At this point I just want to make change and get on with making things better in my life. Can we not make a commitment then and create an action plan to try and do so? I am ready. I want to improve things in my life. Stop beating around the bush then and let us finally address my problem. I am grasping at straws.

[LonesomeTonight]

Could you try just telling her this?

[Anne2.0]

I had to ask my T more than once for helping me with avoiding something, to "push" me, in my words. I was very specific. He was reluctant to be pushy, saying that defenses are there for a reason, yada yada, sometimes there is wisdom in reluctance, blah blah. And afterwards when I was again deft at avoiding something, I asked him to push the next time. He checked in and asked the next time, "Is this the kind of situation where you want me to push?" Me, yes. It was just fine after he "pushed", really more just made a statement of encouragement, "you said you would like to move forward and say something more about this" and then just gave me space.

So in my experience, it was critical not only to ask for help with avoidance, but to ask again when he failed to do it. None of my T's have ever been pushy and like I think you are now, I just didn't want to stay stuck. I knew what the thing was I was trying to approach, and it was so very much better after I talked about it.

[Taylor27]

Can you go in and tell her you are ready to deal with what brought you to seeking therapy. Some therapist let the client decide when they are ready, also they are careful to not trigger up so much emotions at once. It's overwhelming and painful. My t wont allow me to develge to much into my ptsd from childhood sexual, psyichal, emotional abuse because it can take over my life and feel overwhelmed. We do address it in small steps that im able to handle. It's very hard work and so rewarding, I think you are very brave to deal with it, hope your T will be on board.

This is the whole reason I’m so reluctant to try counseling again. In my experience it was like I had to push to work on things... I felt like the counselor forgot everything we spoke about the week before. I’ve been saving money and thinking about going...but when I walk away feeling like they really didn’t help me it feels like an emotional letdown and a waste of my hard earned money.

I am often very upfront addressing something I want to and initiate it directly without sugar coating or hesitance. I started many of my therapy sessions in that way. But I can be similarly skilled when I want to avoid something and escape... this is only one reason why I like people who are insightful, can cut through BS, and discuss it confidently and respectfully. I've never found that in a T that I paid unfortunately. I did once before in someone who used to be a T before retirement; I did not meet him in that capacity but our interactions were very therapy-like and I found it tremendously helpful and compatible.

[WishfulThinker66]

I think you are right and thank you. I just wish I had the guts to do so. I will have to build up my confidence. I don't do confrontations.

[Anne2.0]

Originally Posted by WishfulThinker66

I think you are right and thank you. I just wish I had the guts to do so. I will have to build up my confidence. I don't do confrontations.

Why is asking for what you want a "confrontation?" Call it a request if that helps.

[SlumberKitty]

Maybe write it down and give it to T so it doesn't feel so confrontational? I don't think asking for what you need is a confrontation, but I get that it can feel that way. I hope you are able to talk to your T about what you need, or write it down and start the conversation that way. HUGS Kit

[Fuzzybear]

I would write down something similar to what you’ve shared in this thread and give it to the therapist.