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View Poll Results: Does your T allow contact when they're on vacation? (choose as many as apply) | ||||||
My T always allows contact on vacation. |
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13 | 20.97% | |||
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It depends--length of time they're gone, how client is doing, etc. |
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9 | 14.52% | |||
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They never allow contact while on vacation. |
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8 | 12.90% | |||
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They allow email and generally will reply (just might take longer) |
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9 | 14.52% | |||
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I can email them, but they won't reply till they're back. |
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3 | 4.84% | |||
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I can text, and they'll reply. |
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5 | 8.06% | |||
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I can call (or arrange a phone call), and they'll talk. |
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7 | 11.29% | |||
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They let me come on vacation with them! |
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0 | 0% | |||
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They don't *let* me come on vacation, but I stow away in their luggage. |
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1 | 1.61% | |||
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If a work/professional trip, yes. If a family/personal trip, no. |
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1 | 1.61% | |||
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My T provides a backup T for contact while they're away. |
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8 | 12.90% | |||
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My T doesn't allow outside contact while in town, so why would they allow it while away? |
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4 | 6.45% | |||
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I've never asked because I wouldn't want contact while they're away. |
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15 | 24.19% | |||
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My T never takes vacation. |
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1 | 1.61% | |||
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Other (please explain). |
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10 | 16.13% | |||
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Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 62. You may not vote on this poll |
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Thread Tools | Display Modes |
#26
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Quote:
Oh, I recognise this! You have said elsewhere that you idealise him, how easy would you find it to challenge him about his inconsistency? I cower away from raising this because I want us to be cosy and close, even though the reality is that I am prickly and unwelcoming. |
#27
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The first time my T went on vacation he told me he wouldn't be available at all, so since then I have assumed that's the case. I haven't asked, though.
I might ask for a phone session next time I go away for more than a week, but I'm not sure. TBH I don't always mind having a break from him. |
![]() LonesomeTonight
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#28
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I loved those books. I read all of them.
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![]() LonesomeTonight, unaluna
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#29
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Haha...for me waa easier to be a stowaway when not on vacation. And lives a mile and a half from me. We had therapy at her home....so
__________________
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![]() LonesomeTonight, unaluna
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#30
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I also loved Nancy Drew!
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![]() unaluna
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#31
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Quote:
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__________________
Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
![]() unaluna
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#32
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My T researched therapist burnout for her doctorate and as a result she maintains really firm boundaries of her personal time. She only responds to texts emails and calls during working hours. I once sent her an email about a serious issue at the beginning of a weekend and she did respond immediately so I know she does read outside of working hours (at least occasionally) but I know from conversations together she would never agree to have back and forth contact during a vacation time. She is super protective of her personal time. But she's an excellent therapist in other ways, so I can deal.
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![]() Chyialee, LonesomeTonight, seeker33, SlumberKitty
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#33
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he has yes. he doesn't say I'm not allowed
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#34
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he even said he missed me one time! when I told him I miss him
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![]() SlumberKitty
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#35
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Awwww. I told mine once, in an email, that I hoped it wasn't weird but that I had missed him. He responded that it wasn't weird and that he had missed me too. It was after a vacation and then he was sick immediately after so we missed some more sessions. I was ready to see him again!
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![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() junkDNA, LonesomeTonight
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#36
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Quote:
__________________
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![]() NP_Complete, SlumberKitty
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#37
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I've told my former T that I missed her, even when she was my T but I don't remember her ever saying she missed me. I wonder how I would have felt if she had? I guess we'll never know. Kit
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Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
![]() NP_Complete
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![]() junkDNA, LonesomeTonight
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#38
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One of 'em basically encouraged me to contact her on vacation, cuz she was addicted to being needed. Creepy in hindsight.
The fact that most therapists dictate these sorts of rules and boundaries to clients... man, tells you a lot about how f-d up some of these people are, or become given a little power. |
#39
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Mine does, however she is often on vacation where there are no telephone or internet services. She likes to get really isolated and far from the world on vacation. But if there is a way to contact each other, we do.
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![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() LonesomeTonight
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#40
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My response is I’ve never asked because I wouldn’t want contact while they’re away.
I would be absolutely mortified if my T was talking to me instead of enjoying every moment of her vacation.
__________________
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there. ~Rumi |
![]() LonesomeTonight, seeker33
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#41
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I guess I'd be allowed to message and she'd probably respond but I wouldn't do it. I don't think it's appropriate unless I'm in a serious crisis.
__________________
Complex trauma Highly sensitive person I love nature, simplicity and minimalism |
![]() LonesomeTonight, Under*Over
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#42
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I am encouraged to reach out whenever I feel the need to. Though responses (whether he is on vacation or not) are spotty at best. One exception being if I call and leave a message on his cell phone voicemail. That is part of my safety plan, and me leaving a message in his voicemail means I am having significant difficulty and he will respond as quick as he can.
__________________
"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second." "You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. |
![]() LonesomeTonight
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#43
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My current T encourages me to call him if I "want or need to" during the two times he's been on a vacation since I started seeing him over the summer. The first time was over Christmas break and I called him once when everything went to he ll. He is currently on vacation this week and told me that his access to his phone would be limited but I could still call and he'd get back to me when possible. I told him as long as no one dies or gets murdered again that I would be fine for the week so i haven't called at all.
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![]() LonesomeTonight, Under*Over
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#44
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Quote:
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![]() Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight
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#45
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No, I personally see vacation as their personal time. I would never ask to contact them during their vacation. I would figure something else out if I was in an extreme crisis or something. I am not even really comfortable contacting them between sessions. That just feels too invasive to me really. They deserve their own time off the clock- their entire life shouldnt revolve around me.
But I feel Im kind of the extreme. Ive had multiple professionals tell me they wished I would contact them if I really really need to- that its better to contact than do something impulsive that could cause larger problems than ha... just taking 2 seconds to send a silly email Last edited by Under*Over; Feb 23, 2019 at 06:32 PM. |
![]() LonesomeTonight, seeker33
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#46
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I answered Other because I don't currently see a therapist. When I did see one, it never occurred to me to contact them while they were on vacation. I was never close to any of them.
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![]() LonesomeTonight
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#47
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I'm struck by the wide variety of responses to the poll. There doesn't seem to be one basic way T's handle this issue. My T is less strict than he used to be, because we have been through so much together and are both more invested well into year three. However, I still wouldn't contact him over his vacation; I don't want him to resent me or get stale on working with me.
__________________
Living things don’t all require/ light in the same degree. Louise Gluck |
![]() LonesomeTonight
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#48
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Mostly, my T has made a point of saying that if something urgent came up, I could call her. She has had 2 vacations (in almost 5 years) during which she arranged for a backup T to handle her urgent calls. Typically, she takes a week vacation in the spring, 1-2 weeks in the summer, 1-2 weeks in December, and a smattering of long weekends.
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![]() LonesomeTonight
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#49
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I don't know what the big deal is. All they have to do is not check their email.
I still get work emails, even work texts and calls when I'm on vacation. I usually don't check my emails while on vacation but sometimes I have no choice due to responsibilities. And I never would avoid a text because that means it's urgent. Why would therapists be any different in that regard. I wouldn't just start texting him for the fun of it or anything like that. I am a loss for understanding why therapists are different from the rest of the working world. |
#50
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My current therapist always lets me know before he leaves whether he'll be out of the office but checking messages as usual (so voicemails will get a call back, emails may or may not get a reply depending on content and urgency) or whether he'll be out of contact and having someone else cover his practice (so not checking voicemail or reading email during that time at all). It's always seemed completely reasonable to me. I've only really contacted him about medication-related issues while he's been on vacation, but he's always had his usual level of responsiveness on those occasions.
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![]() LonesomeTonight
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