[Rive1976]

My T told me she didnt want to go home as a child, she had kidney stones but her parents thought she was having sex and she wasnt, that her mom hit her, that she watched her friend get hit by a car and die as a child, that she sees a therapist for mindfulness and other things. Would that bother you?

[nottrustin]

It would bother me that I would feel horrible and even though I shouldn't, I would feel the need to protect her.

My Ts have both reviewed quite a bit over time but for the most part it didnt bring out the feelings if wanting to protect them

[Under*Over]

It depends on how long I have seen them- like with your example... id be more ok knowing all that after a couple of years- than knowing all of that after a couple appointments. People occasionally let something slip, it happens, but if the session is turning more and more about your therapists issues then thats where there is a problem imo.

Of course its also an issue if you just arent comfortable knowing that stuff. That would involve I think communication with the therapist so they can know what to change to help you more

[piggy momma]

It wouldn’t bother me. A lot of mental health professionals are drawn to the profession because of their own experiences with trauma. It can make them a better therapist and more relatable. It’s also nice to see their human side.

[stopdog]

It would more baffle me than bother me. The part that might bother me is why are they wasting my time and money on their issues. The baffling part would be what difference any of the info would make to me. I wasn't paying them to show me a human side and none of that sort of thing would cause a therapist to be more relatable to me.
The things listed by the op don't sound all that upsetting to me - just like a usual sort of life that most people experience, but I do think most of those guys become therapists because of how completely screwed up they are.

[Salmon77]

It depends on why the T is sharing that information and whether the client benefits from it or not. My T has shared some personal stuff, but I think it's mostly to make me feel more comfortable talking about things that are difficult. So if your T talks about her problems growing up, maybe she thinks that will help you feel like you can talk about yours?

[Lemoncake]

Nope, R usually doesn't. A teeny bit here and there. He did once say something that made me question how stable he really was.

The first dude I saw before R for maybe 3-4 sessions at the most practically told me his life history including the fact that he went to Cambridge, had two sons- one who lived in NZ. How much he earned and how many hours he worked a week (28 as he worked on Harley street so charged a bucket load, but charged students less) and that he'd been a mental health nurse before retraining. I never felt like we even talked about anything that brought me to see him...

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

My T almost never mentions anything about his private life. And if he does, there's always a connection to my own stuff. Like a few weeks ago he had to cancel due to his wife having to rush to the hospital. It bothered me a lot and he said that she's better now and on medication. But that's about the extend of what he'll share.

[velcro003]

That level of sharing might bother me a bit--and maybe not the level, but the content. That is some heavy stuff. My T does disclose, but when its relevant to the conversation at hand.

Originally Posted by Dnester

My T told me she didnt want to go home as a child, she had kidney stones but her parents thought she was having sex and she wasnt, that her mom hit her, that she watched her friend get hit by a car and die as a child, that she sees a therapist for mindfulness and other things. Would that bother you?

I like the disclosure. It feels like a more authentic setting when she shares her experience that relates to mine. I feel like she actually understands, which makes me more apt to trust her feedback.

[Carmina]

Not my current one but the last counsellor I had was awful for inflicting her personal stuff on me, I hated every minute and was glad to see the back of her. It felt like she was trying to invalidate everything I said with 'if you think that's bad, mines worse' type arguments.

[satsuma]

Originally Posted by Dnester

My T told me she didnt want to go home as a child, she had kidney stones but her parents thought she was having sex and she wasnt, that her mom hit her, that she watched her friend get hit by a car and die as a child, that she sees a therapist for mindfulness and other things. Would that bother you?

Dnster, my T shares personal things with me, and I like it. He didn't share much at the beginning but has shared more over time. I feel I know the 'real' him and it helps us to be connected.
But that said, if my T shared the things you have quoted here, I think I personally would find it too much. Maybe the mindfulness bit might interest me, but the other things seem like over-sharing IMO. I think they are quite serious things, rather than anecdotes or examples of this and that, so I feel like it would shift the focus of the session towards T and T's life story etc., which isn't right. And if the T did that often and seemed unaware, then I would think that they seemed very unaware for a T, if they were oblivious to the effect this sharing was having on me and my therapy.
Ultimately therapy should be about the client. I find sharing ok IF it is helpful to the client and contributes to what they want to work on in therapy.

[kaleidoscopeheart]

Some people might think its too much but I appreciate his honesty with me. It helps humanize him and keeps him off the pedestal I keep trying to put him on.