Most of you know who I am so I won't bother waving.

So when I was last here. I'd moved. Cut back to one a week. But decided that really wasn't sufficient to do the work. So I had gone back to twice a week, only to decide again, that no, once a week would be enought for me.
It's true, twice a week really kept the stuff at the forefront. But after so many years in therapy, I felt confident that once a week could work.

Even though the decision was mine. I was angry at T for a few weeks for what I felt was her abandonment of me EVEN though it was my choice. T said, that's because feelings aren't rational and cutting back will bring up those early wounds.
It will feel like abandonment.
So we talked about it for a few weeks.
We worked out that if T just contacted me by email on the day of the dropped session, that worked as as form of containment for me. Lessened the feeling of abandonment.
So that's where we're at.
T asked today how I'm feeling now about the dropped session.
I said, in getting used to it now. I've asked myself if I want to go twice a week, and I don't.
Don't stuff did tend to go back to sleep in too the dark recess if the unconscious before it gets a chance to stretch its legs in a session. But I feel I push myself quicker to keen up in the one session I do have because I value it more now. Know there's less time to "man up" and really get into the nitty gritty.

I'll be back with more of my therapy tales

**exits stage left? Right? Walks straight through the curtains*

[unaluna]

Nice to see you back. I like the way your T said the feelings aren’t rational. Mine are like that too, my feelings feel so unreasonable at times.