[junkDNA]

Has anyone dealt with jealousy or dislike from your therapists spouse

I know some might chalk this up to paranoia but , my therapists spouse runs his practices Facebook business page

She blocked me from liking the page or any posts on the page, and from commenting on any post.

That's honestly super passive aggressive

I've been working with my therapist for almost 10 years, and have, at times, been in a lot of communication with his spouse, as I met them both at a residential treatment center in which he was the clinical director and she was my "lodge advisor"

I have at times wondered if his spouse is somewhat jealous towards me and my therapy with my therapist, I dont understand why though.

It just feels ****** to me

Anyway just venting I guess

[sarahsweets]

Does she do that with all the clients or just you?

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

Does she do that with all the clients or just you?

I dont know about other clients honestly

I'm his longest running client

[junkDNA]

I see his other clients like and comment on her posts tho

[Xynesthesia2]

Based on just what you shared in the OP, it is not clear what the spouse would be jealous of, could be many reasons. Did you comment on the page before the blocking? Do you have an idea why she would be jealous?

[unaluna]

You know, just ask him about it. A lot of ts are NOT facebook friends with clients. I would say its more about protecting your privacy.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by unaluna

You know, just ask him about it. A lot of ts are NOT facebook friends with clients. I would say its more about protecting your privacy.

It's not their personal Facebook its the business FB page for his practice

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by Xynesthesia2

Based on just what you shared in the OP, it is not clear what the spouse would be jealous of, could be many reasons. Did you comment on the page before the blocking? Do you have an idea why she would be jealous?

I was able to comment on it like years ago.

As far as what she's jealous of I dont know. I dont even know if its jealousy . It definitely seems as if something is going on. I mean why would she block me for no reason .

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by junkDNA

It's not their personal Facebook its the business FB page for his practice

Why does the world need to know youre his client? Im just saying, if you can be found in news clippings etc, then blocking you is for your and his privacy.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by unaluna

Why does the world need to know youre his client? Im just saying, if you can be found in news clippings etc, then blocking you is for your and his privacy.

I dont think you understand what I'm saying. And when did I ever say the world needs to know im his client . Its their practices Facebook page , where they post inspirational images and articles related to recovery and wellness and also events they hold

I'm not calling you toxic!
Therapist have a duty of care.
I was standing up for you.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by junkDNA

I dont think you understand what I'm saying. And when did I ever say the world needs to know im his client . Its their practices Facebook page , where they post inspirational images and articles related to recovery and wellness and also events they hold

So you can still read the page, just not comment?

I meant the world would know by you leaving your facebook name on the comments.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by unaluna

So you can still read the page, just not comment?


I meant the world would know by you leaving your facebook name on the comments.

Yes. My point is that I dont understand why I've been banned from commenting or even liking the page . I dont comment on it and I found this out after I tried to like a post and the option was removed. I haven't commented on the page since like 2015

Over 1000 people like the business FB page . Many of his clients do comment often and like the posts. As far as outing myself as a client by just commenting or liking a post,I am not concerned about that

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by The mouse

I'm not calling you toxic!

Therapist have a duty of care.

I was standing up for you.

My therapist isn't the one who blocked me. It was his spouse. My therapist doesn't use Facebook and he's told me before that it is his spouse who manages the page

[Xynesthesia2]

I was thinking that perhaps she didn't like something you commented (that is probably the most common reason people block others on social media), but if it was years ago and you only got blocked recently, that would not make much sense. I would just ask the T. I really think most therapists who use social media (including strictly business pages) do not manage them super consistently and democratically. I know this not only from observing but also because one thing I do as private work is managing professional social media for clients. They pretty often ask me to do things and deal with other users in ways that do not make any logical sense to me and are quite discriminating. This includes some mental health professionals. There is also the added layer if someone else is handling the pages and they have freedom to do things on it, they might not always adhere to policies the owner would have, strictly. Why is that? As I mentioned, IMO (and experience) it can be many things, even just as ordinary as an error or unintended click. The latter happened to me a couple times and it resulted in deleting an important contact, purely by mistake, which I did not even notice until much later. Other thing that happened, when handling many social media accounts from one computer, is posting something on the wrong page, for the wrong user, because I was not logged in to the correct account. That can be even more annoying even if it gets deleted immediately. None of these were in FB for me but others where it is easier to make mistakes, but can happen.

I can easily imagine jealousy from a Ts spouse as well, especially if they are in situations like you describe, know the client well etc. But I agree with you, it should not be managed in this way. If they choose to handle the profession in this way, which is a bit unconventional, I think they should be super responsible for not acting out impulses that may come with the nature of the situation. This is why I would ask the T directly, instead of speculating and getting too upset. If you don't want to express the upset, could maybe just say something like "You know I sometimes look at your professional FB page. I've just noticed recently that I'm blocked from it. Do you know why?"

Originally Posted by junkDNA

My therapist isn't the one who blocked me. It was his spouse. My therapist doesn't use Facebook and he's told me before that it is his spouse who manages the page

I know that. But just knowing a t's spouse. Having friends all connected to ones therapy.

Can you not see there's a better way. A more private way.

[InnerPeace111]

It could be jealousy. That’s entirely possible. I suppose there are any number of reasons for it. You get his undivided attention. You get his utmost compassion. You get his validation. He is always kind and patient with you. In other words, you get the very best side of him. However, that’s not what it’s like for her at home simply because he’s not her therapist.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by The mouse

I know that. But just knowing a t's spouse. Having friends all connected to ones therapy.


Can you not see there's a better way. A more private way.

I went to a residential treatment center for 5 years. It was a progressive healing farm . There were 36 residents and we lived there on campus. There were 3 lodges . My therapists spouse was my lodge advisor meaning she lived there with us as well as other staff that lived on campus. My therapist was the clinical director of the program and also my individual therapist. Mt therapist resigned along with his wife and opened the private practice. I was discharged and continued seeing my T in the private practice. His wife also works within the practice managing social media accounts.

This is how I know my therapists spouse

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by InnerPeace111

It could be jealousy. That’s entirely possible. I suppose there are any number of reasons for it. You get his undivided attention. You get his utmost compassion. You get his validation. He is always kind and patient with you. In other words, you get the very best side of him. However, that’s not what it’s like for her at home simply because he’s not her therapist.

Thanks I feel it has something to do with that

I dont meant jealous in like a romantic way

I guess it just feels really passive aggressive. And kinda makes me feel bad about myself

[here today]

Originally Posted by junkDNA

It's not their personal Facebook its the business FB page for his practice

Then if you're blocked it is the business that has blocked you. It might be hard but it seems like you could tell your T that you are blocked and ask what is the reason. Matter of factly, It's business. Maybe he knows, maybe he doesn't, maybe it is all a mistake. It's his business, It's up to him.

[Omers]

I’m sorry you are struggling with this, it sucks. My T’s wife has a very small bit that she does with his practice and I am afraid of the day I meet her. If you look at our interests and such you would think we would be instant friends if we were to meet in public. However, knowing more about her from google diving (T did not provide this info, nor does he know I have it) mt personality would likely set her off in a heartbeat. Sadly though right now this is all assumptions on my part and even if something were to happen it would be hers to figure out. I am not a threat to her or her relationship to her husband.
T’s web page has a blog that is done through a program that automatically give people the option to comment. No one ever has but I really wish there were opportunities for dialogue with others (clients or not as it is a public page) about some of the things on there. Personally I don’t care who knows I a working with my T as I believe everyone can use help at some point in their lives. Were my T to have a Facebook page like what I am imagining your T’s page to be I would feel disappointed that I was blocked. If T’s wife was office manager I can also totally see my T not knowing that/why I was blocked but I would ask about it.
I can also see where this is ethically “messy” with potential to be harmful. I have chosen to be in those “messy” places before and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. It is a risk we can only decide on for ourselves.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by Omers

I’m sorry you are struggling with this, it sucks. My T’s wife has a very small bit that she does with his practice and I am afraid of the day I meet her. If you look at our interests and such you would think we would be instant friends if we were to meet in public. However, knowing more about her from google diving (T did not provide this info, nor does he know I have it) mt personality would likely set her off in a heartbeat. Sadly though right now this is all assumptions on my part and even if something were to happen it would be hers to figure out. I am not a threat to her or her relationship to her husband.

T’s web page has a blog that is done through a program that automatically give people the option to comment. No one ever has but I really wish there were opportunities for dialogue with others (clients or not as it is a public page) about some of the things on there. Personally I don’t care who knows I a working with my T as I believe everyone can use help at some point in their lives. Were my T to have a Facebook page like what I am imagining your T’s page to be I would feel disappointed that I was blocked. If T’s wife was office manager I can also totally see my T not knowing that/why I was blocked but I would ask about it.

I can also see where this is ethically “messy” with potential to be harmful. I have chosen to be in those “messy” places before and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. It is a risk we can only decide on for ourselves.

The whole thing makes me feel insecure and weird about going to his practice now

[atisketatasket]

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