Signs of abusive therapist?

What are some signs of an abusive therapist?

/ What are some things that therapists should NOT be doing that aren't so obvious to therapy newbies?

and how common is abuse by therapists?

You could Google red flags in therapy for a signs of what they could be , if you have concerns about something people here are quite experienced to ask as a safety check. I see you are new so welcome to the forum !

I follow this rule for myself: If something doesn’t feel right or doesn’t sit well with you, it’s probably not a good thing for you. Trust your gut. Follow your instincts. Listen to your intuition. You might even feel a physical effect in your heart (peaceful) or stomach (sinking). Love and trust yourself. Always.

I realize these are not specific things like you are asking for but maybe you will still find something helpful in my response.

Unwarranted touch.

A T who poses as the expert authority and whose judgment ought not to be questioned.

A T who engages in mind games.

Lack of ethical boundaries and professionalism.

Trust your gut instincts..

50 Warning Signs of Questionable Therapy and Counseling

Thanks @stopdog I was looking for that article for this post and here you posted the link. Thanks

I don't think that abuse by therapists is common. I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I am now on my 12th therapist. None of them were what I would consider abusive. A couple of them had questionable boundaries, by which I meant that they talked way too much about themselves. I hate that. If they want to talk about their problems they should go hire their own therapist. If they want to talk about how wonderful they are and how they solved their own problems they should write a book or something. I don't care.

I think that a therapist talking about themselves too much is a sign that things could get worse. I think any touch that is more than a handshake and is not requested by the client is a red flag. There are a lot of things that I don't like that they do sometimes, like being overly bossy and talking too much in general, but that's a preference of mine, not really abuse.

This is very encouraging, thank you!

My first T was questionable. I had no clue about therapy at that stage. I mean no clue.
She seemed nice enough. Saw her weekly. Then she took quite a bit of time off because her dog died.. OK. I love dogs but...
So after about 6weeks she came back. We met, she told me about her thought processes over taking time off... How the dog meant everything to her and she needed to take care of herself.. (, thanks for reading this, far if you have and you've not died from laughter )
As I say, I'd no idea what was appropriate. I knew I felt hurt inside. Felt abandoned. Never did how I feel come up (alarm goes off)

Do I'm desperate for love, to be cared for at this stage (just stopped drinking after 25yrs)
I kept seeing her. She said I want to send you something (no idea if that says the done thing at that stage in my life) she sent me HER feelings on her childhood. On note paper. (might have been sprayed with perfume)
Reading it meant nothing to Is there a Swedish word for picking up dogshit through a bag but there being just too much so that when you try and pick up the last bit, you drop the previous bit and when you pick that bit up again you drop the other bit, and so on until you shout “**** off!” at the dogshit?. I'd never got in touch with my own feelings at this stage.
I just felt a bit weirded out by it, but wanting someone to love me was strong. I didn't know this wwrong. That the T her post herself was not fit to practise.
Eventually I put her to the test and said I think I'm OK now, and will leave.
She let me

When look back now. How naive I was. How she was allowed to practise!

Now whrn I hear purple say they're trained in the mental health field I pay close attention. 99% turn out to be big ego manics with 1% real knowledge.

@out there:
I think its more common than you think. If you look around here you will see threads that are pages and pages long of people's experiences.
Personally, I feel that a red flag would be a therapist( not a psychologist, I mean a basic therapist or social worker) who diagnoses you with a mental illness. Therapists Im sure are good at labeling things and some know their stuff but more and more I hear about people that were told they were bipolar and after a psychiatrist visit they are told they do not, or that they have a different mental illness. That is not to say that they would be wrong or do not know mental illness just that I personally would go to someone that has actual training to diagnose mental illness.

I know it’s not meant to be funny but I couldn’t help it, I laughed. Notes on her childhood? On a note paper? No disrespect for dog lovers but 6 weeks bereavement? 6 weeks?

Thank you for your response , but as I like to work on how my perceptions are and what I either think or feel people have said , I would offer this for you to consider. @ Out There " I think it's more common than you think " Notice how I did not comment on how common abuse is in any way ? I never mentioned it all in what I wrote. But you are perceiving me to be thinking that abuse is not common , and that you know what I think. I'm not having a go at you , and I'm not overly bothered by it , I'm just bringing it to conscious awareness for you.

Edited to add , on rereading the thread , the post you seem to be responding to was actually made by Maybeblue and not by me ?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Out There Thank you for your response , but as I like to work on how my perceptions are and what I either think or feel people have said , I would offer this for you to consider. @ Out There " I think it's more common than you think " Notice how I did not comment on how common abuse is in any way ? I never mentioned it all in what I wrote. But you are perceiving me to be thinking that abuse is not common , and that you know what I think. I'm not having a go at you , and I'm not overly bothered by it , I'm just bringing it to conscious awareness for you. Edited to add , on rereading the thread , the post you seem to be responding to was actually made by Maybeblue and not by me ?

Yes ! So sorry. And I’m not trying to stir up trouble. I was just trying to share what other people have said they experienced. When I first joined I didn’t know there was such a thing as abusive therapists. Then when I was made aware of it I started to think these few people had chips on their shoulders. Then I was made aware of how pervasive frequent it seemed to be and my beliefs and attitude changed. In fact I had to apologize and make amends for the dismissive way I talked to people. Sorry for the confusing comments.

Thanks Sarah , I do recall what you mentioned happening , it's all learning and growth , and I appreciate you responding to me as you have. I know you're not trying to stir up trouble , no worries

here is a link to another site with a pretty extensive list that breaks down the warning signs into different categories:

Treatment Abuse Checklist – Surviving Therapist Abuse

I don't think abusive therapy is necessarily all that common, although I think it happens a lot more than that profession admits. I think mediocre uselessness is a more common occurrence those people also do not admit and dismiss because clients just fade off.

I agree. Theres a lot of abuse in mental health. It may not always be intentional but the negative effects are real.
Also part of the problem (In the US) is that these therapists need to use the DSM to code for billing so people get lables thrown on them they dont deserve

I agree that it may not be intentional but the negative effects are very real. I'm not having a go at anyone here , but there have been responses and responses to responses on this thread that include a post and a perception that I never made but which are referencing my user name. Could other members please be mindful of this if they wish to comment further as I'm finding it a little upsetting. Thank you.

I don't have a mother. My first therapist took it upon herself to include me into her family. We went on vacations together. Spent holidays together. We celebrated each of our children's birthdays with big parties. I was over ever Sunday for a meal. Then I became psychotic and had repeated trauma reactions from a traumatic childhood. She decided I was too much work. I was admitted to a psych hospital and she ended contact. I spent an entire year in patient.

So, the answer is yes. There are some horrific therapists out there. If you are vulnerable, they are very hard to detect.