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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2017
Location: Here
Posts: 1,731
7 1,505 hugs
given |
#781
We don't celebrate Christmas here, but we have long New Year holidays, so I'll have to spend about 2 weeks at home with my abusive parents without seeing you or my dear coworkers. I can't even think about it. I don't know how to survive.
I also quit my meds again. It made me feel worse. I didn't tell you yesterday.
Possible trigger:
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Blueberry21, chihirochild, ElectricManatee, Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, Out There, Purple,Violet,Blue, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Anonymous45127
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 2,164
6 1,834 hugs
given |
#782
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chihirochild, ElectricManatee, Lemoncake, Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, LostOnTheTrail, Out There, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Tweaky Dog
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 4,861
12 3,170 hugs
given |
#783
The Compassion Question (yes, that's what we're calling it now) contributed to keeping me awake last night. Intellectually, of course I believe I'm deserving of 'compassion, kindness and love', but...everybody is. And 'everybody' includes them. Bastards.
__________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#784
Today was better mainly because I spent 3 hours studying in my local Starbucks.
£80 (therapy fees) to spend guilt free... I hate Christmas. __________________ Last edited by Lemoncake; Dec 23, 2019 at 12:57 PM.. |
Lonelyinmyheart, Out There, SlumberKitty, zoiecat
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#785
I've played that song by the band you like
multiple times, but still don't feel connected to you at all. It's like what I said before: HIn the movie the day after tomorrow when the dad says : " I will come for you". How could he find his son if he didn't know where he was. I don't know where you are. __________________ |
chihirochild, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty, unaluna
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Member
Member Since Apr 2017
Location: Parts Unknown
Posts: 333
7 77 hugs
given |
#786
Thirty years later and I'm still not ready to tackle this topic. I hate talking about it because I feel so alone. I can't handle it and I still don't feel like I have the support to get past it. I feel lost and stuck and overwhelmed. Thanks for trying, but I think I give up on this one.
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Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,751
(SuperPoster!)
7 8,984 hugs
given |
#787
Do you actually like me? I mean I know our sessions always go good so I guess that’s what really matters. And we do connect. But do you like me. And why do I for some reason not really care if you do yet am wondering?
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Member
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Space
Posts: 73
5 11 hugs
given |
#788
Oh I don’t know. I just would like to talk to you, but without seeing you. Come back.
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Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Member
Member Since Sep 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 394
9 25 hugs
given |
#789
You were in my dream the other night. We were sat on a bench in a park. It was cold so I was huddled up to you. You were talking but I couldn't hear you, you realise so stop taking and put your arm around me sort of tucking me inside your coat. I put my cold hand up in between your jumper and shirt, you laugh and and put your head on top of mine. Then we just sit there warm and safe, watching the leaves fall and sky eventually darken.
On the one hand it was lovely and made a nice change from the horrific nightmares I've had lately, but on the other hand it sort of cut more deeply. Reminding me how much I miss you and miss working with you. |
Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#790
See I don't need you. I dont need anyone.
__________________ |
chihirochild, Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2008
Posts: 7,361
15 25 hugs
given |
#791
T: this is painful. just a few hours w my mom and i have nothing to say. SEE: i AM an empty shell.
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SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,906
(SuperPoster!)
9 75.2k hugs
given |
#792
Dear T,
Well, Christmas Eve dinner has been survived. Now have to get through tomorrow. Hopefully I can sleep a bit better tonight compared to last night, but having my doubts...It would be nice if I could not have any dreams about that man from my past or cats or people attacking me--that would help, I think... Miss you. Love, LT |
SlumberKitty
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Legendary
Member Since Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,950
(SuperPoster!)
12 5,477 hugs
given |
#793
T,
I have to do more than 1-2x a month. I changed companies to see someone more often than 2x a month. __________________ Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
SlumberKitty
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#794
Quote:
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SlumberKitty
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captgut
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#795
Counting down the days till I leave again.
(9 ) I know I keep making the same mistakes over and over again with regards to coming back. __________________ |
chihirochild, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, SlumberKitty, unaluna
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Anonymous45127
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#796
13 days left until you come back and oh yes that exam on the same day, which I haven't exactly been studying for.
~Options: a) I could email you now to say "hi". b) I could act out and cancel our next upcoming sessions after all you did choose to leave after all. c) send no emails for now and carry on watching random youtube videos and the current one about stars whose careers were damaged by regular people. __________________ |
LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Anonymous45127
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Member
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Space
Posts: 73
5 11 hugs
given |
#797
I’m doing quite well. I’m low on words though. Low on mood, too. But I’m managing quite well.
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Anonymous45127
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2008
Posts: 7,361
15 25 hugs
given |
#798
T: That was the LONGEST two days. I really hope you still plan on working on tuesday.
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Blueberry21, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Anonymous45127
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Grand Member
Member Since Apr 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 916
7 409 hugs
given |
#799
Well Christmas did not go as well as Thanksgiving. I guess she was no longer just happy to see me after 3 years away. She an push my buttons in an instant. I am not looking forward to seeing you tomorrow and I am sure you will not be happy to see me or hear about the state of my head. I am not in a good place and I am not in the mood to discuss it with you. Just be grateful that you did not have the childhood I had or have to still experience the fallout of a lifetime of abuse. Holidays are the absolute worst time of year. Why can't we include holidays in the PC culture of the US right now. The constant pushing of "holiday happiness" gushing out of every inch of the media and society is extremely disturbing for some people and there is currently only one way to avoid it. I know this will never happen but I wish the world could be more sensitive to people struggling during the holidays.
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Blueberry21, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Anonymous45127
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,786
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#800
18 days off work just for Christmas?
“Goodbye and good luck.” __________________ |
Blueberry21, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete, SlumberKitty
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Closed Thread |
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